In Response to the Despicable Wave of These...
You know you're from ACHS if...NO, YOU'RE A WHINY LOSER!
- you have developed anger management issues: So you're now able to manage your anger?
- you know that if youre not black you can not get away with half the stuff they do: I brought a nail clipper in with a dull knife attachment and pulled it on a kid as a joke. I was let off the hook whereas I'm sure a "nigger" would've been suspended.
- you have wondered how in the HELL people in J wing know there is a fight down in C wing in less than 10 secs: I've never wondered since the superior architecture of the school allows one to see all the way down the main hallway from J to C wing.
- you have had to hide behind a pillar or another obstacle to avoid being trampeled when a fight broke out: I'd do this anywhere if a fight broke out, not that I've needed to.
- you know that our school holds alottt more ppl than is legal: The legal limits are posted outside of every room and I assure you that when added, we are below full capacity.
- you have wondered if that strange kid is really an undercover cop: I've never seen anybody strange enough to suspect, and even if there was, why complain? He's protecting you from all of the dangers so vividly pointed out in the rest of this list.
- you have been amused by reading the graffiti on the bathroom stalls ... "it never rains da hood" "shaniqua was here" <--- "shaniqua is a motha fuckin bitch yo, watch yoself nigga": I've also been amused reading similar grafitti in alleyways and other city buildings, not to mention that Brigantine skater punks account for a large amount of the bathroom grafitti as well.
- during class, at least one nigger has walked up to the door and knocked on it while staring in: This has happened. Apparently, the "nigger" wanted to speak with the teacher concerning an assignment he'd missed.
- you have wondered how at times there are more ppl in the hall than in classes: Could it be since it's between periods?
- you have been a part of or have witnessed Gym AP: The new gym sucks.
- you love how most ppl are scared of niggers and avoid being around them but u walk right next to them hoping to brush them so theyll yell and u will have probable cause to yell back: Why do this if you're afraid? Why even be afraid? I think it's just dickheads looking for an excuse to yell at black people for some petty reason.
- you have said "nigger" with as little as 3 black ppl around: As long as you're not racist, nobody minds. It's very similar to me being called a cracker or whitey.
1. You've bitched out a black girl.: I find myself bitching out snooty white bitches with twice the frequency and ferocity.
2. When you hear "ooohhhhhh!!" You immediately look around and follow the swarm of people.: I'd look around for the cause of a riot in any situation.
3. You have spent the better part of a period walking around with no specific destination in mind.: This is because you are lazy and dumb.
4. You've "gone to guidance".: Since we're priveleged enough to be provided with a guidance office open all period of the day, I see no reason not to go there.
5. You've actually gone to guidance more than 3 times in one day.: This can also be attributed to laziness and stupidity of the individual going to guidance to escape class.
6. You know the difference between "niggers" and "black people.: Black people have bad days. This does not make them niggers. White people have bad days and are twice as ornery and confrontational as "niggers" at the time. What does that make them?
7. You hate "niggers".: I do not officially recognize "niggers" as a class in and of itself.
8. You walk through the hallways between classes defensively.: If you didn't constantly assert the fact that you hate "niggers", you wouldn't need to be so defensive.
9. You've "shared answers".: You mean cheated? Students have done this for decades across the country.
10. You have blatantly cheated on a test and didn't get caught, or the teacher saw you, but just didn't care.: You are either a good cheater, or your teacher is tired from reprimanding years' worths of assholes just like you.
11. You've been to a theory concert.: I have, they are ok.
12. You have taken Axelsson's psych class.: I have not.
13. You have dropped at least one class.: Kids drop classes all of the time, in many schools. Classes can be uninteresting or difficult to other students outside of Atlantic City.
14. You hate your guidance counselor.: She was good until she stopped working due to cancer. My new one's good as well.
15. Your academic records have had to be corrected.: People make mistakes. My record, for one, has been flawless.
16. You have had to buy a "temporary".: This is the most workable solution to keeping out those who do not belong and maintaing control at lunch periods, as well as a source of revenue for school improvement.
17. You have been hit with ketchup when walking out of the cafeteria.: I have not. Food fights have happened in other places as well, and re-enactments can be witnessed in the Saved by the Bell, and Boy Meets World Series, both aired before the new ACHS was even built.
18. You are prepared to stop on a dime, in case a black girl decides to bust a move in the hallway.: I'm prepared to stop on a dime since preppy assholes feel the need to slap hands and exchange words of endearment before moving on.
19. You've said ott, word, ayo, and nigga in one sentence, and it made perfect sense.: Considering that ott, word, ayo, and nigga were used in the previous sentence and it made perfect sense, I see no qualms here.
20. You've slept in the majority of your classes in one day.: Tired people will sleep anywhere, even if it requires you to be disrespectful and harmful to your own educational experience.
21. You have left school early and waved to the security guard as you drove away.: Do you want them to chase you on a golf cart? And when several Margate girls and Vahan and co. were caught leaving, they complained that there were worse things in school than them escaping, and berated security for stopping them/
22. You have developed an elaborate plan to kill Mrs. Tyson.: I do not know Mrs. Tyson, though she sounds evil.
23. You have become very talented in the art of origami thanks to Ms. Slater.: Origami looks very nice.
24. You've almost suffocated from the stench of Mr. Donharl.: I have never heard of him.
25. You have written a hate note to your teacher as the answer to a question on your homework and still got a 100.: I have never born witness to this happening.
26. You've laughed every time Ms. Callender completely rotates to write something on the board.: Yes, she is very fat.
27-40: lalalalauren84
27. You didn't do your paper, yet convinced your dumb teacher that you did it and that she lost it...so she gave you an A: This is due to laziness of the student, who would whine about the teacher as well if they gave them a 0.
28. You have walked through the metal detectors and had them beep (at least 1000 times) and the security guards did nothing: Yet so many complain when they pat you down and thoroughly search your bags.
29. You call the principle by his/her first names: This is simply disrespect on the part of the student, who I suppose feels superior for it.
30. You think that it is funny when the ugly prom queen goes to AA classes: This is funny.
31. You have come late at least 10 times yet it says 0 lates on your report card: Teachers do their students' favors, especially if it is something so petty as 5 minutes of class time that is generally unpivotal to their education.
32. You text all the time during your classes...sometimes even call: This is mere assholeishness on the part of the texter/caller.
33. You had a clear backpack...and tried ALL the time to get away with a nonclear one: Clear backpacks were an excellent step towards school safety, negated by the effect of mostly Ventnor, Brigantine, or Margate residents ignoring the rules and wearing normal bags in the face of authority.
34. You think it is funny, not scary, that ACHS was declared unsafe: I find it funny since I haven't experienced anything near what you'd expect for the 3rd most violent school in the county (or state?), and that the majority of fights are minor scuffles that would otherwise go unnoticed aside from being catalogued and used in the absurd rating.
35. You don't attend school dances (except prom), they are not for white people: Why was the junior prom queen white? And what's wrong with a mostly black dance considering that they comprise most of the population of ACHS?
36. You never listen to the annoucements, the people who read them can barely read anyway: If you can read better, you should have auditioned for the position. I, for one, can understand them perfectly, aside from the natural stumbles over words that we all experience.
37. You do your homework the period before its due, or sometimes during the period that its due: Procrastinators have been doing this across the country for decades. It is due to the laziness of the student, not the school.
38. You love fights. They are the best part of school: They are very good. I enjoy the fact that I have a good education more so, but they are entertaining.
39. You are clueless to the fact that we actually have a dress code: I'm aware of it, and haven't witnessed any dress that would be considered against it, aside from some especially revealing summer clothing equally enjoyed by asian, white, black, latino, and indian hos.
40. You have mastered the art of bullshitting: I am an awful bullshitter, and see no need for it as long as you complete your assignments and go to class on time.
41-42: artisticdork
41. you have actually spent more time outside because of fire drills than you have inside: This occurred no more than twice at the end of last year, when no classes were actually being taught and finals were done with.
42. you have went to literally all the bathrooms in school only to find their all locked: I have always been able to find one unlocked, or found a helpful security guard to unlock it for me.
43-59: jehoseeeventer
43. You've made up an allergy to bromine to avoid swimming in the pool: I do have an allergy to bromine, it gives me colds throughout swimming season. Considering that we are lucky enough to have the nicest high school swimming pool within a 20 mile radius however, I see no reason not to swim.
44. You've used someone else's ID to get into his or her lunch (and it worked too): Lunchroom monitors cannot be expected to differentiate the facial features of you and your similar looking friend from a tiny picture seen for no more than a half of a second. This is not an impossible or difficult feat by any stretch of the imagination.
45. You've made a job of leaving after 4th period by the end of senior year: This can be attributed to apathy and laziness of the students, at no fault to the school.
46. You're willing to take a different route to avoid walking past Arsenis' room, and if you had Khan you still take the different route: Having never had either, I cannot comment.
47. You've been late to class because downstairs G Wing 'flooded': I've never heard of the entire wing flooding, just the bathroom. Considering this is not directly in your path to class, I can't see why it would make somebody late.
48. You remember when the band was good? We miss Mr. Brown: The band was never good. Except for the nigger drummers, they've always been.
49. You've seriously considered breaking a leg to take the elevator: This sounds like the last resort of an idiot desperate not to take the stairs for some unknown reason.
50. If you're an alumni you remember the cat incident; if you aren't you've heard about it: Yeah, I'm not.
51. You've had something taken by security and gotten it back the next day to find the batteries missing: Security, in their infinite wisdom, took the batteries in order to prevent you from using the device in school, where it does not belong.
52. You never knew there was a payphone by the main entrance: I am aware of this. There's also a free one in the office.
53. You've had a regular class in E100: I never have, and cannot comment.
54. You see at least 2 different pregnant girls everyday: There are 1/2 million teens under 17 who are pregnant in the USA. I am proud that Atlantic City's continue with their education rather than dropping out.
55. You've stolen at least one magazine from the library: You know you are a thief, not an ACHS student.
56. You actually knew the ugly prom queen: Prom queens are students too. I'm sure many of us know them.
57. You've been to a football game just to watch the cheerleaders: Our cheerleaders are excellent. They bore, however, over the course of 2 hours. Our football team is entertaining as well.
58. Instead of checking your pass the security guards smile and ask how you've been: We all (aside from the blind) have the ability to see something out of the corner, or top/bottom of our eyes without directly looking at it. This includes security guards who give you the courtesy of a smile and a kind word.
59. You know all the gym teachers even if you've never had class with them: I do not.
x_crashcourse 59-
59. You ate your fries without condiments: Fries without condiments?!? I've never heard of a more terrible torture devised in all my years!
60. Instead of running to a place where they can't hit, you hid amongst the huddle of people during a food fight, only to find out, thats where it started: This logically means that you are a friend/acquaintance of those that started it, and were prepared to hide in the first place.
61. You were either: A)One of the victims of the infamous locker bathroom muggings/beatings B)The person who did the mugging/beating C)In the stalls and were too afraid to come out: D: None of the above. There have been, what, 3 bathrooom beatings? From what I heard those who were beaten deserved it. I never bore witness.
62. Skipped in Dr. Jack's class: I never had Dr. Jack.
63. Who remembers running in gym with ONE ghetto boombox in the middle playing music?: I remember, and appreciate the music as opposed to running around to nothing at all.
64. "Weight Room" -- enough said: It's a wonderful program.
65. You look interested in the lunch but the lunch guy said "You don't want that, trust me, we made it.": Perhaps he was being funny, considering I've never heard of anybody actually contracting food poisoning from the cafeteria food.
66. Have had traffic problems walking in the halls because all of the sudden, THEY JUST STOP AND BREAK INTO SONG AND JUST ... DANCE: Who? Oh, you must mean Maxine Patroni since she's always walking around singing shitty songs that she assumes all those around her want to hear. I don't.
67. You've witnessed the dead crickets/crawfish by C-wing bathrooms that were used for dissections: I haven't witnessed.
- you know that if youre not black you can not get away with half the stuff they do: I brought a nail clipper in with a dull knife attachment and pulled it on a kid as a joke. I was let off the hook whereas I'm sure a "nigger" would've been suspended.
- you have wondered how in the HELL people in J wing know there is a fight down in C wing in less than 10 secs: I've never wondered since the superior architecture of the school allows one to see all the way down the main hallway from J to C wing.
- you have had to hide behind a pillar or another obstacle to avoid being trampeled when a fight broke out: I'd do this anywhere if a fight broke out, not that I've needed to.
- you know that our school holds alottt more ppl than is legal: The legal limits are posted outside of every room and I assure you that when added, we are below full capacity.
- you have wondered if that strange kid is really an undercover cop: I've never seen anybody strange enough to suspect, and even if there was, why complain? He's protecting you from all of the dangers so vividly pointed out in the rest of this list.
- you have been amused by reading the graffiti on the bathroom stalls ... "it never rains da hood" "shaniqua was here" <--- "shaniqua is a motha fuckin bitch yo, watch yoself nigga": I've also been amused reading similar grafitti in alleyways and other city buildings, not to mention that Brigantine skater punks account for a large amount of the bathroom grafitti as well.
- during class, at least one nigger has walked up to the door and knocked on it while staring in: This has happened. Apparently, the "nigger" wanted to speak with the teacher concerning an assignment he'd missed.
- you have wondered how at times there are more ppl in the hall than in classes: Could it be since it's between periods?
- you have been a part of or have witnessed Gym AP: The new gym sucks.
- you love how most ppl are scared of niggers and avoid being around them but u walk right next to them hoping to brush them so theyll yell and u will have probable cause to yell back: Why do this if you're afraid? Why even be afraid? I think it's just dickheads looking for an excuse to yell at black people for some petty reason.
- you have said "nigger" with as little as 3 black ppl around: As long as you're not racist, nobody minds. It's very similar to me being called a cracker or whitey.
1. You've bitched out a black girl.: I find myself bitching out snooty white bitches with twice the frequency and ferocity.
2. When you hear "ooohhhhhh!!" You immediately look around and follow the swarm of people.: I'd look around for the cause of a riot in any situation.
3. You have spent the better part of a period walking around with no specific destination in mind.: This is because you are lazy and dumb.
4. You've "gone to guidance".: Since we're priveleged enough to be provided with a guidance office open all period of the day, I see no reason not to go there.
5. You've actually gone to guidance more than 3 times in one day.: This can also be attributed to laziness and stupidity of the individual going to guidance to escape class.
6. You know the difference between "niggers" and "black people.: Black people have bad days. This does not make them niggers. White people have bad days and are twice as ornery and confrontational as "niggers" at the time. What does that make them?
7. You hate "niggers".: I do not officially recognize "niggers" as a class in and of itself.
8. You walk through the hallways between classes defensively.: If you didn't constantly assert the fact that you hate "niggers", you wouldn't need to be so defensive.
9. You've "shared answers".: You mean cheated? Students have done this for decades across the country.
10. You have blatantly cheated on a test and didn't get caught, or the teacher saw you, but just didn't care.: You are either a good cheater, or your teacher is tired from reprimanding years' worths of assholes just like you.
11. You've been to a theory concert.: I have, they are ok.
12. You have taken Axelsson's psych class.: I have not.
13. You have dropped at least one class.: Kids drop classes all of the time, in many schools. Classes can be uninteresting or difficult to other students outside of Atlantic City.
14. You hate your guidance counselor.: She was good until she stopped working due to cancer. My new one's good as well.
15. Your academic records have had to be corrected.: People make mistakes. My record, for one, has been flawless.
16. You have had to buy a "temporary".: This is the most workable solution to keeping out those who do not belong and maintaing control at lunch periods, as well as a source of revenue for school improvement.
17. You have been hit with ketchup when walking out of the cafeteria.: I have not. Food fights have happened in other places as well, and re-enactments can be witnessed in the Saved by the Bell, and Boy Meets World Series, both aired before the new ACHS was even built.
18. You are prepared to stop on a dime, in case a black girl decides to bust a move in the hallway.: I'm prepared to stop on a dime since preppy assholes feel the need to slap hands and exchange words of endearment before moving on.
19. You've said ott, word, ayo, and nigga in one sentence, and it made perfect sense.: Considering that ott, word, ayo, and nigga were used in the previous sentence and it made perfect sense, I see no qualms here.
20. You've slept in the majority of your classes in one day.: Tired people will sleep anywhere, even if it requires you to be disrespectful and harmful to your own educational experience.
21. You have left school early and waved to the security guard as you drove away.: Do you want them to chase you on a golf cart? And when several Margate girls and Vahan and co. were caught leaving, they complained that there were worse things in school than them escaping, and berated security for stopping them/
22. You have developed an elaborate plan to kill Mrs. Tyson.: I do not know Mrs. Tyson, though she sounds evil.
23. You have become very talented in the art of origami thanks to Ms. Slater.: Origami looks very nice.
24. You've almost suffocated from the stench of Mr. Donharl.: I have never heard of him.
25. You have written a hate note to your teacher as the answer to a question on your homework and still got a 100.: I have never born witness to this happening.
26. You've laughed every time Ms. Callender completely rotates to write something on the board.: Yes, she is very fat.
27-40: lalalalauren84
27. You didn't do your paper, yet convinced your dumb teacher that you did it and that she lost it...so she gave you an A: This is due to laziness of the student, who would whine about the teacher as well if they gave them a 0.
28. You have walked through the metal detectors and had them beep (at least 1000 times) and the security guards did nothing: Yet so many complain when they pat you down and thoroughly search your bags.
29. You call the principle by his/her first names: This is simply disrespect on the part of the student, who I suppose feels superior for it.
30. You think that it is funny when the ugly prom queen goes to AA classes: This is funny.
31. You have come late at least 10 times yet it says 0 lates on your report card: Teachers do their students' favors, especially if it is something so petty as 5 minutes of class time that is generally unpivotal to their education.
32. You text all the time during your classes...sometimes even call: This is mere assholeishness on the part of the texter/caller.
33. You had a clear backpack...and tried ALL the time to get away with a nonclear one: Clear backpacks were an excellent step towards school safety, negated by the effect of mostly Ventnor, Brigantine, or Margate residents ignoring the rules and wearing normal bags in the face of authority.
34. You think it is funny, not scary, that ACHS was declared unsafe: I find it funny since I haven't experienced anything near what you'd expect for the 3rd most violent school in the county (or state?), and that the majority of fights are minor scuffles that would otherwise go unnoticed aside from being catalogued and used in the absurd rating.
35. You don't attend school dances (except prom), they are not for white people: Why was the junior prom queen white? And what's wrong with a mostly black dance considering that they comprise most of the population of ACHS?
36. You never listen to the annoucements, the people who read them can barely read anyway: If you can read better, you should have auditioned for the position. I, for one, can understand them perfectly, aside from the natural stumbles over words that we all experience.
37. You do your homework the period before its due, or sometimes during the period that its due: Procrastinators have been doing this across the country for decades. It is due to the laziness of the student, not the school.
38. You love fights. They are the best part of school: They are very good. I enjoy the fact that I have a good education more so, but they are entertaining.
39. You are clueless to the fact that we actually have a dress code: I'm aware of it, and haven't witnessed any dress that would be considered against it, aside from some especially revealing summer clothing equally enjoyed by asian, white, black, latino, and indian hos.
40. You have mastered the art of bullshitting: I am an awful bullshitter, and see no need for it as long as you complete your assignments and go to class on time.
41-42: artisticdork
41. you have actually spent more time outside because of fire drills than you have inside: This occurred no more than twice at the end of last year, when no classes were actually being taught and finals were done with.
42. you have went to literally all the bathrooms in school only to find their all locked: I have always been able to find one unlocked, or found a helpful security guard to unlock it for me.
43-59: jehoseeeventer
43. You've made up an allergy to bromine to avoid swimming in the pool: I do have an allergy to bromine, it gives me colds throughout swimming season. Considering that we are lucky enough to have the nicest high school swimming pool within a 20 mile radius however, I see no reason not to swim.
44. You've used someone else's ID to get into his or her lunch (and it worked too): Lunchroom monitors cannot be expected to differentiate the facial features of you and your similar looking friend from a tiny picture seen for no more than a half of a second. This is not an impossible or difficult feat by any stretch of the imagination.
45. You've made a job of leaving after 4th period by the end of senior year: This can be attributed to apathy and laziness of the students, at no fault to the school.
46. You're willing to take a different route to avoid walking past Arsenis' room, and if you had Khan you still take the different route: Having never had either, I cannot comment.
47. You've been late to class because downstairs G Wing 'flooded': I've never heard of the entire wing flooding, just the bathroom. Considering this is not directly in your path to class, I can't see why it would make somebody late.
48. You remember when the band was good? We miss Mr. Brown: The band was never good. Except for the nigger drummers, they've always been.
49. You've seriously considered breaking a leg to take the elevator: This sounds like the last resort of an idiot desperate not to take the stairs for some unknown reason.
50. If you're an alumni you remember the cat incident; if you aren't you've heard about it: Yeah, I'm not.
51. You've had something taken by security and gotten it back the next day to find the batteries missing: Security, in their infinite wisdom, took the batteries in order to prevent you from using the device in school, where it does not belong.
52. You never knew there was a payphone by the main entrance: I am aware of this. There's also a free one in the office.
53. You've had a regular class in E100: I never have, and cannot comment.
54. You see at least 2 different pregnant girls everyday: There are 1/2 million teens under 17 who are pregnant in the USA. I am proud that Atlantic City's continue with their education rather than dropping out.
55. You've stolen at least one magazine from the library: You know you are a thief, not an ACHS student.
56. You actually knew the ugly prom queen: Prom queens are students too. I'm sure many of us know them.
57. You've been to a football game just to watch the cheerleaders: Our cheerleaders are excellent. They bore, however, over the course of 2 hours. Our football team is entertaining as well.
58. Instead of checking your pass the security guards smile and ask how you've been: We all (aside from the blind) have the ability to see something out of the corner, or top/bottom of our eyes without directly looking at it. This includes security guards who give you the courtesy of a smile and a kind word.
59. You know all the gym teachers even if you've never had class with them: I do not.
x_crashcourse 59-
59. You ate your fries without condiments: Fries without condiments?!? I've never heard of a more terrible torture devised in all my years!
60. Instead of running to a place where they can't hit, you hid amongst the huddle of people during a food fight, only to find out, thats where it started: This logically means that you are a friend/acquaintance of those that started it, and were prepared to hide in the first place.
61. You were either: A)One of the victims of the infamous locker bathroom muggings/beatings B)The person who did the mugging/beating C)In the stalls and were too afraid to come out: D: None of the above. There have been, what, 3 bathrooom beatings? From what I heard those who were beaten deserved it. I never bore witness.
62. Skipped in Dr. Jack's class: I never had Dr. Jack.
63. Who remembers running in gym with ONE ghetto boombox in the middle playing music?: I remember, and appreciate the music as opposed to running around to nothing at all.
64. "Weight Room" -- enough said: It's a wonderful program.
65. You look interested in the lunch but the lunch guy said "You don't want that, trust me, we made it.": Perhaps he was being funny, considering I've never heard of anybody actually contracting food poisoning from the cafeteria food.
66. Have had traffic problems walking in the halls because all of the sudden, THEY JUST STOP AND BREAK INTO SONG AND JUST ... DANCE: Who? Oh, you must mean Maxine Patroni since she's always walking around singing shitty songs that she assumes all those around her want to hear. I don't.
67. You've witnessed the dead crickets/crawfish by C-wing bathrooms that were used for dissections: I haven't witnessed.