Love and Tango
I went to Portland for Tangofest, the first time I've ever been to the event, and only the second time I've ever danced in Portland. So while I had a blast dancing constantly for about two days, the part that really made it interesting was running into my ex-girlfriend, Laurel.
I hadn't even seen her for about 4 years. In that time, we exchanged a couple perfunctory emails, but I basically lost track of her. I had heard from her brother that she had started dancing tango, and I knew she was attending Reed. But she was also a traveler, and for all I knew, she was in Italy again, or maybe on The Moon. So I figured that if I ever did make it up to Portland, there was a chance that I might run into her. That idea both terrified and excited me. Our final meeting hadn't gone very well, and I didn't fancy seeing her ever again after that. But then... she was fucking hot, and you can't have a loving relationship like we did and not keep at least some part of that with you for the rest of your life.
So I went to the first event on Friday night not knowing if I wanted to see her there or not. My anxieties were answered about as fast as I could ever hope for, she walked in right after I finished putting on my shoes. She actually spotted me first, which saved me the trouble of deciding how to approach her.
I guess cutting things more to the point: she was still fucking HOT, and on top of that, she had become a sexilicious dancer. Any awkwardness fell away quickly and I once again felt totally comfortable with her. I don't want to give the impression I'm still in love with her, that's not at all how I feel. But I felt something unique dancing with her. It was both exciting to be dancing with someone new, someone that I had a prior intimate relationship with, and just comfortable, because even after 5 years of being apart, I still felt warm and content holding her.
I think I learned this weekend that some kinds of love go past silly changes in relationships. That after I've been as close to someone like Laurel, I'll always feel her connection in me. I kinda like that.
I hadn't even seen her for about 4 years. In that time, we exchanged a couple perfunctory emails, but I basically lost track of her. I had heard from her brother that she had started dancing tango, and I knew she was attending Reed. But she was also a traveler, and for all I knew, she was in Italy again, or maybe on The Moon. So I figured that if I ever did make it up to Portland, there was a chance that I might run into her. That idea both terrified and excited me. Our final meeting hadn't gone very well, and I didn't fancy seeing her ever again after that. But then... she was fucking hot, and you can't have a loving relationship like we did and not keep at least some part of that with you for the rest of your life.
So I went to the first event on Friday night not knowing if I wanted to see her there or not. My anxieties were answered about as fast as I could ever hope for, she walked in right after I finished putting on my shoes. She actually spotted me first, which saved me the trouble of deciding how to approach her.
I guess cutting things more to the point: she was still fucking HOT, and on top of that, she had become a sexilicious dancer. Any awkwardness fell away quickly and I once again felt totally comfortable with her. I don't want to give the impression I'm still in love with her, that's not at all how I feel. But I felt something unique dancing with her. It was both exciting to be dancing with someone new, someone that I had a prior intimate relationship with, and just comfortable, because even after 5 years of being apart, I still felt warm and content holding her.
I think I learned this weekend that some kinds of love go past silly changes in relationships. That after I've been as close to someone like Laurel, I'll always feel her connection in me. I kinda like that.