Solace
Disclaimer: not mine don't sue
She was angry. She was almost shaking with rage. It was the thing that would stick with her: hearing that Kara Thrace was dead. That and the terrible stillness of Bill's voice. It was something she had never heard from him before. He wasn't angry or sad or bitter. Hell, from his tone, he might have been talking about the weather but he was talking so quietly she knew even before he said it that something terrible had happened. Part of him died with her, she would later realize. She was his best, brightest girl and part of Bill died with her. It seemed like a violation of nature even to her. Kara Thrace was too alive, too lucky, too free to be dead.
As awful as Bill's voice had been, his expression was worse when he walked into her cabin. She stood up and took a step towards him but he stopped. She understood, he wasn't ready yet, he had a job to do here. Bill had come to tell Sam that his wife was dead. Bill needed to keep it together until he did that. So he sat in the chair by her desk and they waited what seemed like an eternity. Tory came in and put a fresh box of tissues on her desk but otherwise left them alone.
"I'm so sorry, Bill," she said, and he simply nodded and looked away.
Finally, Sam came through the door smiling, and he seemed to take up half the space in the room.
"What's up,?" he asked.
He was so light, so happy to see her, even though she gave him bad news half the time they met. She almost wished she had given some sort of warning, that this was about more than his job on the Salpica. It was funny, but Laura would remember that smile, how he seemed right before his world got blown to pieces. Barolay, a step behind him, stoic and watchful in contrast to Sam's good humor, Laura was glad she was here Sam would need all the comfort he could get soon enough. Then Bill turned and faced him and the realization crept across Sam's face and he asked, "What happened?"
Sam looked back and forth between them as Bill took a step closer.
"Is it Kara?" he barely breathed.
Bill stood in front of him and said terribly softly, "She’s gone. I'm sorry." Sam crumpled, tears falling silently, and Laura heard Barolay gasp like she had been struck. "She…she," Bill choked out, wanting to explain.
Laura stood up to go offer comfort to Bill, but Sam simply reached out and hugged him. Bill stiffened at first. Laura actually thought he might shove Sam away, but then his shoulders started to shake. After a moment, Bill moved back and Laura took his arm, and Barolay hugged Sam as they sobbed. Laura realized she was crying as they all moved over to comfortable seats. The tables were still littered with papers from the meeting Laura had been in when Bill called. For what seemed like hours, they sat and cried. Bill finally broke the silence.
"She went into the gas giant chasing a raider. She hit the hard deck, her bird was crushed. We're still not sure exactly what happened"
Sam nodded but he didn't really seem to be listening. (Laura would find out later that this was a highly embroidered version of events and that Bill was lying to himself about what happened.) At that moment, however, she just thought it sounded so inauspicious a way for "The Legendary Starbuck" to go out.
Sam blinked and wiped his face with his hand, trying to pull himself together.
"What do we do now?" he asked, and tears spilled over in his eyes before he even finished the sentence.
Laura dabbed at her face with a tissue and looked at Bill who was stone-faced once again
"We should go back to Galactica. The recovery team should have brought her back by now," Bill said.
Sam nodded.
"Yeah, that sounds like a plan,” he said, standing up. Laura held up the tissues for him, and he took a few and wiped the tears off his face again. Barolay shook herself and then blew her nose and stood up. Wordlessly, they filed out and headed for the raptor that would take them back to Galactica. On her way out, Laura signaled Tory to follow her. There would be quite a few arrangements to make and the press had to be dealt with, and Tory would be useful for that. The loss of Kara Thrace would reverberate throughout the fleet, and Laura knew that the grieving was just beginning for the fleet’s best and brightest girl.
She was angry. She was almost shaking with rage. It was the thing that would stick with her: hearing that Kara Thrace was dead. That and the terrible stillness of Bill's voice. It was something she had never heard from him before. He wasn't angry or sad or bitter. Hell, from his tone, he might have been talking about the weather but he was talking so quietly she knew even before he said it that something terrible had happened. Part of him died with her, she would later realize. She was his best, brightest girl and part of Bill died with her. It seemed like a violation of nature even to her. Kara Thrace was too alive, too lucky, too free to be dead.
As awful as Bill's voice had been, his expression was worse when he walked into her cabin. She stood up and took a step towards him but he stopped. She understood, he wasn't ready yet, he had a job to do here. Bill had come to tell Sam that his wife was dead. Bill needed to keep it together until he did that. So he sat in the chair by her desk and they waited what seemed like an eternity. Tory came in and put a fresh box of tissues on her desk but otherwise left them alone.
"I'm so sorry, Bill," she said, and he simply nodded and looked away.
Finally, Sam came through the door smiling, and he seemed to take up half the space in the room.
"What's up,?" he asked.
He was so light, so happy to see her, even though she gave him bad news half the time they met. She almost wished she had given some sort of warning, that this was about more than his job on the Salpica. It was funny, but Laura would remember that smile, how he seemed right before his world got blown to pieces. Barolay, a step behind him, stoic and watchful in contrast to Sam's good humor, Laura was glad she was here Sam would need all the comfort he could get soon enough. Then Bill turned and faced him and the realization crept across Sam's face and he asked, "What happened?"
Sam looked back and forth between them as Bill took a step closer.
"Is it Kara?" he barely breathed.
Bill stood in front of him and said terribly softly, "She’s gone. I'm sorry." Sam crumpled, tears falling silently, and Laura heard Barolay gasp like she had been struck. "She…she," Bill choked out, wanting to explain.
Laura stood up to go offer comfort to Bill, but Sam simply reached out and hugged him. Bill stiffened at first. Laura actually thought he might shove Sam away, but then his shoulders started to shake. After a moment, Bill moved back and Laura took his arm, and Barolay hugged Sam as they sobbed. Laura realized she was crying as they all moved over to comfortable seats. The tables were still littered with papers from the meeting Laura had been in when Bill called. For what seemed like hours, they sat and cried. Bill finally broke the silence.
"She went into the gas giant chasing a raider. She hit the hard deck, her bird was crushed. We're still not sure exactly what happened"
Sam nodded but he didn't really seem to be listening. (Laura would find out later that this was a highly embroidered version of events and that Bill was lying to himself about what happened.) At that moment, however, she just thought it sounded so inauspicious a way for "The Legendary Starbuck" to go out.
Sam blinked and wiped his face with his hand, trying to pull himself together.
"What do we do now?" he asked, and tears spilled over in his eyes before he even finished the sentence.
Laura dabbed at her face with a tissue and looked at Bill who was stone-faced once again
"We should go back to Galactica. The recovery team should have brought her back by now," Bill said.
Sam nodded.
"Yeah, that sounds like a plan,” he said, standing up. Laura held up the tissues for him, and he took a few and wiped the tears off his face again. Barolay shook herself and then blew her nose and stood up. Wordlessly, they filed out and headed for the raptor that would take them back to Galactica. On her way out, Laura signaled Tory to follow her. There would be quite a few arrangements to make and the press had to be dealt with, and Tory would be useful for that. The loss of Kara Thrace would reverberate throughout the fleet, and Laura knew that the grieving was just beginning for the fleet’s best and brightest girl.