(no subject)
never have been a big fan of the holidays ever since my parents divorced. that stereotypical family around the dinner table, that doesnt apply to our family. my brother, mom and myself sitting in front of the tv eating our turkey. far from perfect, but better than nothing.
usually my brother and i go out and drink afterward. same goes for christmas eve. i drink to numb the hundreds of reasons why i should kill myself. i drink for the emptiness my father has left when he walked out of my life years ago. not all of my reasons why i drink are brought on by depression.
i hate the holidays. i become that person no one wants to be around. it would hurt my mom if i were to tell her that. so i keep it to myself. just another little secret to add to the vault.
keep forgetting that im human
constantly thinking im a machine
feeling as if im invincible
when really im just a mere mortal
just another nobody
whos got a superiority complex
ive got a gun to my head
did that get your attention?
another contradicting asshole
who vomits hypocrisy
and smells of lies
i am only human
but i wish i were a machine
i would be without emotions
usually my brother and i go out and drink afterward. same goes for christmas eve. i drink to numb the hundreds of reasons why i should kill myself. i drink for the emptiness my father has left when he walked out of my life years ago. not all of my reasons why i drink are brought on by depression.
i hate the holidays. i become that person no one wants to be around. it would hurt my mom if i were to tell her that. so i keep it to myself. just another little secret to add to the vault.
keep forgetting that im human
constantly thinking im a machine
feeling as if im invincible
when really im just a mere mortal
just another nobody
whos got a superiority complex
ive got a gun to my head
did that get your attention?
another contradicting asshole
who vomits hypocrisy
and smells of lies
i am only human
but i wish i were a machine
i would be without emotions