YO
I don't even know how to start an LJ entry anymore b/c its been so long since I've actually written an actual, thoughtful post with meaning. I think that I've finally sorted out all the shit thats been swirling around in my mind making me stressed and irritable. I'm becoming more and more sure of my thoughts on ASU, on friendships here at Bryant, my relationship with my family, and all of you back at home (well at college now I guess). I find it very very difficult to realize that youas a person has changed, but let me explain. Throughout our lives we encounter many people, some of whom we become close to, and over a period of time, they change, and it's apparent, and we either deal with it or disconnect ourselves from them. I've gone through this many times, but this time its me who has changed and being aware of it is such a different feeling that one I've ever experienced. I don't know if I'm gonna do a good job explaining it, but here goes anyways. My perspective on life has changed quite a bit. Remember when Todd was that anal kid who took school way way way too seriously? Well, that mentality has taken a back seat to getting the most I can out of my life. I still focus on school and thrive to do well, but I'm not letting it consume my life anymore like I used to. Remember when Todd got mad at his friends for chilling with other people and thought that everyone I hung out with had to be present in order for it to be legit? Yeah, he's gone too. I have so many different kinds of friends here at school and I'm realizing that I chill with a different person every night, and none of them have connections to any of my other friends. I think a big part of that has to do with how our group of friends has changed and how I've had to divide my time in order to still be able to spend time with all of you. Remember when Todd thought drugs alcohol and cigarettes were bad for you? Well, they are, but Todd doesn't give a shit anymore. I'm an experimenter, a user, NOT an abuser and I'm absolutely stoked at how I can do everything in moderation and still go to the gym twice a day while keeping my work load under control. Remember the shy, quite, unconfrontational Todd who never said anything to people he didn't know? Gone too. My social skills are so much better now that I've had to be on my own and I think that will help me a lot this summer and in the future, especially if I go to AZ. I on't wanna ramble anymore, but I just wanted to let you guys know whats been going on in my mind lately, and that I'm in a pretty good place. Miss you guys, peace out.