why say i love you?

[schmerz_pain]

why would someone say i love you and knowing that it doesn't mean the same
you feel as if you heart is ripped out of your chest
while there holding it laughing
as you stumble back
into the grave they dug up for you

all happieness is now gone
from your sight
your eyes
and you now only focus
on the pain

it may seem only trivial to most
but what if it doesn't to you
you just sit there in pain
looking at a blank screan
wanting to type and spill

i'm in fear that you see
the pain and only try to help
but you don't realize is that your hurting me
more and more every day
i cannot stop now

time
ha
i give it one laugh
for i believe i cannot stop
loving you

god if i have to wait then i will
if i have to see you date others i will die
deeply inside and walk away
let you be and let you see
that i care enough to know janelle

it's my time to leave?