begining of a year
here I am.
1:49 minutes into the year, and already I'm dissappointed in it.
this is probly just late night depression, so if you see this and worry about me, don't.
during the day, it seems like life might be worthwhile and all that nonsense.
but at night, deep in the night, when I can't sleep because life seems so bleak, thats when this part of me comes out.
my day self hates this part of me, but I hate him too, when I'm allowed out, I hate him equally as much as he hates me. of course, he's not really capable of hate, but whatever equivilent emotion there is, he has it for me.
days are too cheerful
thats why I love winter
cold, short days, ice, you don't have to see people's ugly skins, the sun doesn't beat down in that yellow intruding way. and no shorts, I hate shorts, no matter who is wearing them.
the only girl that loves me is over 500 miles away, there is no way to see her, likely I will never see her.
my parents don't know about her, and I'm not gonna tell them either, they already dissapprove of my lifestyle. they dissapprove of my reading material(if you get my drift), they dissapprove of my sleeping habits, they don't like my eating habits, or my attitude towards scouts.
I'm gonna buy them the stupid toner, and enough paper to last them months, just to shut them up about it.
I hate money. I hate it, it only causes trouble.
I hate relationships, they are too complicated, and the pain outways the reward.
--------
anyway, here I am, 1:58 minutes into the new year, and its already showing signs of being just as bad as last year, if not worse.
I doubt that I will experience anything new on the relationship front, so thats a step back
I doubt that I will learn anything new, I doubt that I will profit this year, in fact, I'm just going to try to break even. new freinds? doubtful they will last the year. old freinds will leave. I will fall in the respect of my parents, and I doubt that I will be able to move out.if I am faithful to my current girlfreind, I will be nailed to the floor this year in all respects, of course, even if I fail her, I doubt that there would be any movement.
national debt is rising, the war is failing to accomplish whatever it was supposed to
yep, this is going to be a sucky year, lets toast it *toast*
1:49 minutes into the year, and already I'm dissappointed in it.
this is probly just late night depression, so if you see this and worry about me, don't.
during the day, it seems like life might be worthwhile and all that nonsense.
but at night, deep in the night, when I can't sleep because life seems so bleak, thats when this part of me comes out.
my day self hates this part of me, but I hate him too, when I'm allowed out, I hate him equally as much as he hates me. of course, he's not really capable of hate, but whatever equivilent emotion there is, he has it for me.
days are too cheerful
thats why I love winter
cold, short days, ice, you don't have to see people's ugly skins, the sun doesn't beat down in that yellow intruding way. and no shorts, I hate shorts, no matter who is wearing them.
the only girl that loves me is over 500 miles away, there is no way to see her, likely I will never see her.
my parents don't know about her, and I'm not gonna tell them either, they already dissapprove of my lifestyle. they dissapprove of my reading material(if you get my drift), they dissapprove of my sleeping habits, they don't like my eating habits, or my attitude towards scouts.
I'm gonna buy them the stupid toner, and enough paper to last them months, just to shut them up about it.
I hate money. I hate it, it only causes trouble.
I hate relationships, they are too complicated, and the pain outways the reward.
--------
anyway, here I am, 1:58 minutes into the new year, and its already showing signs of being just as bad as last year, if not worse.
I doubt that I will experience anything new on the relationship front, so thats a step back
I doubt that I will learn anything new, I doubt that I will profit this year, in fact, I'm just going to try to break even. new freinds? doubtful they will last the year. old freinds will leave. I will fall in the respect of my parents, and I doubt that I will be able to move out.if I am faithful to my current girlfreind, I will be nailed to the floor this year in all respects, of course, even if I fail her, I doubt that there would be any movement.
national debt is rising, the war is failing to accomplish whatever it was supposed to
yep, this is going to be a sucky year, lets toast it *toast*