News on TTAV and a Pity Party
Hey guys, I’m really sorry I haven’t updated To Tame a Viking in quite a while. Believe it or not, I’m working on the new chapters now. Long story short, my main issue has been college. I am an English major, so I do a lot of reading and writing. As a result, I am busy. I want to get a scholarship for next semester, so I am working hard to keep my grades high.
During this time of the semester, professors begin to realize that their time is halfway through. So for the past couple of weeks, wild midterms have been appearing left and right. While I love writing fanfiction, school takes priority.
Like I said earlier, I’m working on the next chapter right now. I initially planned to complete and post it tonight, but I’m afraid I’m very upset tonight and will have to postpone it until later this week. I feel a bit bad about doing this. I know that I’m by no means the greatest writer in the world, but I also know that there is a little group of people who read and enjoy this fanfic. I get antsy when fanfics I like aren’t updated in a while, and I just want you guys to know that it’s not a “dead fic”.
Just a heads up: the next part of this journal entry will be my trivial venting and bitching. I feel like an attention whore for doing this, after all, I’ve posted this to DA and LJ. I will justify it, however, by saying that this bullshit has been stored up for a long time and has pretty much exploded tonight. I would call up some of my IRL friends, but it’s late and I’m sure their busy. I don’t want to bother them with my stupid, 19-year-old first world problems. They, unlike you, don’t have a back button. If I were to call them up, they would feel obligated to listen, an obligation that people over the internet don’t have.
Now that I’m done justifying my obnoxious journal posts, I’d like to say that my first (trivial) problem is coming out as Bisexual to my parents. I’m out to pretty much all of my friends, but it kills me that I can’t even try to tell my parents without wimping out. I’m really close to them, and I don’t want to lose that. I guess there are two reasons why I’m afraid: 1. they make homophobic/biphobic comments as “jokes” all of the time and 2. I came out to them in high school and they basically didn’t believe me, so I crawled back into the closet. So yeah, I have to come out to them, AGAIN. I wish I could, because I love them and they deserve to know.
My second silly problem is the fact that my forever alone-ness is making me downright depressed. I’m single. I have been single for a long time. My only relationship was with my ex-GF, who was cruel and emotionally abusive. We’ve been split for two and a half years, and I have fallen HARD for one of my old guy friends from high school. He’s sweet, smart, honest, caring, funny and heartbreakingly handsome. Now, we go to different colleges, but these colleges are close by. Hell, he may even be transferring to my college next year. Over the summer, he told me that he thought I was pretty and regretted not dating me when we were in high school. Last month, we even conspired to hang out over a weekend because we missed each other sooooooooo much. For those reasons I thought I had a chance with him. Nope. Fate, the fucking bitch, jut won’t let me be happy and in love. I logged onto Facebook today and what did I see on my newsfeed? Yep, pictures of him and another girl kissing, cuddling and holding hands. I don’t know the girl, and I bet she’s a wonderful person of he’s dating her, but I can’t help but be jealous. It’s a pretty asshole-ish emotion on my part: the poor girl probably doesn’t even know who I am and has done nothing wrong. And, obviously, he’s happy. I want to be happy for him, but I can’t.
Those of you that actually read this, I’m sorry for wasting your time and being an attention seeker. I just had to let it out.
During this time of the semester, professors begin to realize that their time is halfway through. So for the past couple of weeks, wild midterms have been appearing left and right. While I love writing fanfiction, school takes priority.
Like I said earlier, I’m working on the next chapter right now. I initially planned to complete and post it tonight, but I’m afraid I’m very upset tonight and will have to postpone it until later this week. I feel a bit bad about doing this. I know that I’m by no means the greatest writer in the world, but I also know that there is a little group of people who read and enjoy this fanfic. I get antsy when fanfics I like aren’t updated in a while, and I just want you guys to know that it’s not a “dead fic”.
Just a heads up: the next part of this journal entry will be my trivial venting and bitching. I feel like an attention whore for doing this, after all, I’ve posted this to DA and LJ. I will justify it, however, by saying that this bullshit has been stored up for a long time and has pretty much exploded tonight. I would call up some of my IRL friends, but it’s late and I’m sure their busy. I don’t want to bother them with my stupid, 19-year-old first world problems. They, unlike you, don’t have a back button. If I were to call them up, they would feel obligated to listen, an obligation that people over the internet don’t have.
Now that I’m done justifying my obnoxious journal posts, I’d like to say that my first (trivial) problem is coming out as Bisexual to my parents. I’m out to pretty much all of my friends, but it kills me that I can’t even try to tell my parents without wimping out. I’m really close to them, and I don’t want to lose that. I guess there are two reasons why I’m afraid: 1. they make homophobic/biphobic comments as “jokes” all of the time and 2. I came out to them in high school and they basically didn’t believe me, so I crawled back into the closet. So yeah, I have to come out to them, AGAIN. I wish I could, because I love them and they deserve to know.
My second silly problem is the fact that my forever alone-ness is making me downright depressed. I’m single. I have been single for a long time. My only relationship was with my ex-GF, who was cruel and emotionally abusive. We’ve been split for two and a half years, and I have fallen HARD for one of my old guy friends from high school. He’s sweet, smart, honest, caring, funny and heartbreakingly handsome. Now, we go to different colleges, but these colleges are close by. Hell, he may even be transferring to my college next year. Over the summer, he told me that he thought I was pretty and regretted not dating me when we were in high school. Last month, we even conspired to hang out over a weekend because we missed each other sooooooooo much. For those reasons I thought I had a chance with him. Nope. Fate, the fucking bitch, jut won’t let me be happy and in love. I logged onto Facebook today and what did I see on my newsfeed? Yep, pictures of him and another girl kissing, cuddling and holding hands. I don’t know the girl, and I bet she’s a wonderful person of he’s dating her, but I can’t help but be jealous. It’s a pretty asshole-ish emotion on my part: the poor girl probably doesn’t even know who I am and has done nothing wrong. And, obviously, he’s happy. I want to be happy for him, but I can’t.
Those of you that actually read this, I’m sorry for wasting your time and being an attention seeker. I just had to let it out.