indulge me
ugh. i got this sudden attack of this crazy stupid depression. it was triggered by realizing that a formerly good friend hasn't friended me on facebook yet. we basically haven't talked all month. i guess he really is done with me now. he's a social network site whore. he accepts requests from anyone, whether he knows them or not, pretty regardless of whether he likes them. i sent a friend request like a week ago and he's friended other people since, and that sent me on this freak out.
see, he was my default buddy for a year and a half. when that quit it was still cool cause rinne was around. but now she's moved to ohio. those two were the only ones in my best friend circle who still lived here, everyone else is elsewhere. now the people i'm closest with, or could be closest to have other priorities, like school or crazy hectic jobs so i rarely see them.
i have friends i can call up and go out with, but i realized i don't have anyone that i can call and just go watch a movie with on their couch. and that's what i need right now because i'm broke. i can't afford to go out.
i probably do, but i'm hysterical right now so i sure as hell can't figure out who they are.
i'm even at the point where i might put up with cats again. i hate cats. everything about them. well, everything that comes with touching them. i'm allergic to them, so they make me sick, and i hate picking cat fur off my clothes. after dumping mac i decided that i wouldn't ever date another guy who has cats. i'm still firm on that. but i decided that no matter how cool someone was, if they had cats i wouldn't go to their house. after like 5 years that's finally not working out so well anymore. it was fine up until now. i've met lots of awesome cool people lately who i maybe could hang with, but they have cats. guess i have to suck it up and start carrying a lint brush. at least i had 5 glorious relatively cat hair-free years.
i'm the most socially active person i know, how can i not have any friends?
that's part of it, though, everyone knows i'm really social, so no one thinks to invite me out because they assume i already have plans. gr. not true. not friggin true. if i haven't called you inviting you somewhere it's probably because i don't have anything to do!
this also wouldn't be such an accute problem if i had my own place. i'd have people over all the time. as it is that's not an option. le sigh.
so, please, indulge me. if we can hang on your couch watching movies, maybe make cupcakes, and it doesn't have to be a wild exciting time, just comfortable and happy, forgive me that i've forgotten or overlooked you and let me know.