(no subject)
Here's exactly what I want to say to you:
I want to tell you something. You caught me in the midst of a huge incline in my faith. In my life yes, I've believed in God, I've said I'm Catholic, I've acknowledged myself with the Catholic faith, I've grown little by little, but in the last four months I've never grown so close so fast to God in my entire life. Part of it has to do with this group I'm in, called FAT. Faithful, available, teachable. Explain class... and another part of it is you. It's no secret that I like you and admire you. And I see how strong you are in your faith and I want to be that strong. I want to be that close to God and I want to show you that I can be. And at times when I'm reading the bible or listening to sermons or finding music I have to check myself, who am I really doing this for, God or Casey? God knows when your motivation is wrong and when you're doing things for Him or for what He promises (Abraham). So I just wanted to tell you that I need to pray about it and think about it and if I'm doing it for the right reasons, to get closer to God, or to spend more time with you and impress you.
I also want to tell you that I recognize you have been a God wing. After Christmas came I wasn't sure how much we'd be talking. I loved our conversation on Monday but had no idea what would happen after. And I said to myself that I shouldn't try to contact you a lot because I didn't want to feel like I was proving my faith to you all the time and that if you wanted to talk about it you would message me. And I prayed and I prayed and I prayed. Then the day after you sent me the article. And I was like OK God, thank you. He does want you to be in my life. And then I sent you stuff and you didn't send me anything back. And I was like ok, trying to prove too much again. And then there was dinner and hanging out with your friends and I felt like you invited me over to play games obligatorily and I decided I would delete your number and let you come to me if you wanted to. And I prayed and prayed and prayed and said God I don't know if you're trying to tell me I'm doing this for the wrong reasons or if I should keep pursuing sharing my faith with him and not give up or what, please give me a sign. And I convinced myself that you wouldn't even notice me not calling you for a while and I shouldn't get my hopes up that you would try and chat with me. Finally after settling my heart on that I get home and you call me. You call me. And I can't even tell you how many times I thanked God after that phone call. So yes, you are a God wing, but before I can fly away I need to make sure it is what God wants and not what I want alone.
I want to tell you something. You caught me in the midst of a huge incline in my faith. In my life yes, I've believed in God, I've said I'm Catholic, I've acknowledged myself with the Catholic faith, I've grown little by little, but in the last four months I've never grown so close so fast to God in my entire life. Part of it has to do with this group I'm in, called FAT. Faithful, available, teachable. Explain class... and another part of it is you. It's no secret that I like you and admire you. And I see how strong you are in your faith and I want to be that strong. I want to be that close to God and I want to show you that I can be. And at times when I'm reading the bible or listening to sermons or finding music I have to check myself, who am I really doing this for, God or Casey? God knows when your motivation is wrong and when you're doing things for Him or for what He promises (Abraham). So I just wanted to tell you that I need to pray about it and think about it and if I'm doing it for the right reasons, to get closer to God, or to spend more time with you and impress you.
I also want to tell you that I recognize you have been a God wing. After Christmas came I wasn't sure how much we'd be talking. I loved our conversation on Monday but had no idea what would happen after. And I said to myself that I shouldn't try to contact you a lot because I didn't want to feel like I was proving my faith to you all the time and that if you wanted to talk about it you would message me. And I prayed and I prayed and I prayed. Then the day after you sent me the article. And I was like OK God, thank you. He does want you to be in my life. And then I sent you stuff and you didn't send me anything back. And I was like ok, trying to prove too much again. And then there was dinner and hanging out with your friends and I felt like you invited me over to play games obligatorily and I decided I would delete your number and let you come to me if you wanted to. And I prayed and prayed and prayed and said God I don't know if you're trying to tell me I'm doing this for the wrong reasons or if I should keep pursuing sharing my faith with him and not give up or what, please give me a sign. And I convinced myself that you wouldn't even notice me not calling you for a while and I shouldn't get my hopes up that you would try and chat with me. Finally after settling my heart on that I get home and you call me. You call me. And I can't even tell you how many times I thanked God after that phone call. So yes, you are a God wing, but before I can fly away I need to make sure it is what God wants and not what I want alone.