pokémon -- ohio is for lovers (2/2)

[scenotaphs]

title: ohio  is for lovers
wordcount: 2461
rating: PG 
summary: Twenty secrets, twenty different ways to say I love you; different people have different ways of expressing themselves, and it doesn't have to be through words.

Comments

[snoaz]

My favourites of this batch: Morty/Kimon Girl, Darach/Caitlin, Diamond/Platina and Marge/Ruby (coincidently you wrote about the same scene I did haha).

But there was some great writing here. I especially liked this sentence: One evening finds her and Morty atop the Bell Tower-he stands out against the backdrop of gold and vermillion like a dark blot of ink spilled amongst the crinkled fallen leaves, whilst she all but drowns in the sea of rusty, muted colours, the edges of the silken fabric of her kimono bleeding into the papery foliage. It really fits with the setting of Ecruteak. I also liked how you gave the Kimone Girls, or at least one of them, a story and a character.

“So be it,” Marge declares, the cold blaze of contempt colouring her rising tones. “If I can’t have you, nobody else can.” That was awesome. I am biased because I really like this pairing, but the drabble was well written and just great <3

As for criticism... well, I'm not sure with some of the drabbles how they fit the prompt. But then again, I guess that's the disadvantage with having a lot of stories; it's hard to adjust them all. The overall theme may get lost. Still, I enjoyed these pieces a lot - both for pairings I've never read for before, and the more known ones :)

[scenotaphs]

Yeees. Thanks to the kink meme, I have come to absolutely adore Morty/Kimomo Girl; I don't know, but it lends itself very well to my style, I guess.

(: Thank you! I admit, I took huge liberties with that scene there, but nothing wrong with a little creative license, eh?

Yeah, partway through this I started having misgivings, but I guess after a while, my theme became 'oh, hey, let's try to fit as little actual spoken dialogue into this as possible, and if I can, use exactly 167 words worth of speech, like was allotted in that poem'. Sadly, I failed rather dismally - instead of that, I had 361 words. But at the end of the day, perhaps I didn't let myself down too badly - that only accounted for about 7% of the entire fic, which I'm rather proud of -- especially given that I used to have a horrible tendency to overuse dialogue.

As always, thanks for the valued feedback! ❤❤