Title: Snugglewhoring for Idiots (The Pillow Ninjas remix)
Author:
dreamweavernyx Genre: Friendship/Crack
Rating: G
Notes: Written for
bubbly at
Cycle 7 of
jentfic_remix.
Beta-read by
keeconk.
Link to Original Story:
Sungglewhoring for Idiots (10th Edition) Link to Original Writer:
twirly_skirt Jun adjusts his sitting position on the hotel bed as he turns a page of his well-worn copy of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix.
He has just reached the point where Harry and friends ride off to the Ministry on Thestralback, when his ears pick up the soft sound of his door closing.
“…Who’s there?” he calls warily, hoping fervently it’s not a creepy stalker in the guise of hotel staff.
“Chill,” laughs a familiar voice.
Jun relaxes unconsciously.
“Oh,” he says dryly. “Nino, what are you doing in my room? And how did you get in anyway?”
Nino opts not to reply, instead grabbing the spare pillows from the closet. He throws them onto the bed, before crawling in and wrapping the blanket around himself.
“Nino,” Jun frowns. “That’s my share of the blanket you’re taking as well.”
Grumbling, Nino halfheartedly chucks a pillow in the general direction of Jun, though he misses by a mile and hits the painting on the wall instead.
“You’re noisy,” he mumbles, voice muffled due to the fact that his head is currently buried in a pillow. “I nicked your spare key. My room’s cold and empty, so I came here.”
Jun takes all of fifteen seconds to decipher the muffled noises, and sighs.
“Just…sleep and don’t bother me,” he says, giving up.
Nino hides a grin.
“Yes, boss,” he says cheekily, and stretches out his legs under the sheets.
“Shit,” Jun grumbles. “Your toes are cold.”
“Told ya.”
A little while later, Jun is startled by another pair of cold toes poking his leg. Looking up from Harry Potter, he meets Aiba’s eyes.
“When did you come in?” he asks.
“Just now,” Aiba tells him vaguely. “You were too absorbed in your book to notice.”
Wait.
Jun’s eyes narrow in suspicion.
“How did you get in?”
“…Through the door,” Aiba says after a while, as if it’s the most obvious answer in the world. (It probably is, but it isn’t the answer Jun’s looking for.)
Jun opens his mouth to ask another question, but is cut off when Aiba curls up and cuddles against his side.
“No more questions,” he mumbles. “M’sleep.”
Aiba’s hair is ticklish, and distracts him from his reading, but Jun tries to soldier on and finish at least the next two chapters before sleeping.
The next person to crawl into Jun’s bed is, surprisingly, Sho.
“Forget it,” Jun sighs. “I’m not even going to ask how or why you’re here.”
Sho grins sheepishly at him, before locating a Sho-sized spot on the bed somewhere near Nino.
“Sho-chan!” Aiba stage-whispers, eyes blinking open. “There you are!”
“Go to sleep, Masaki,” Sho says mildly, reaching across Nino’s head to pat Aiba’s fluffy hair. His elbow digs into Jun’s stomach, as his other arm somehow locates Nino and wraps around his midsection.
Jun rolls his eyes.
“Fine, we’ll all go to sleep now,” he says dryly, putting down his book and reaching for the bedside lamp’s switch.
Click.
“Matsujun, aren’t you supposed to leave a light on somewhere so we can see in case of an emergency?”
“Shut up and sleep, Nino.”
Around 3 in the morning (or at least, Jun thinks it’s probably around 3 in the morning) the door clicks, and a silhouette comes stumbling in.
“There you all are,” Ohno mumbles. “Jun-kun, did you know your door was open?”
Jun is wide awake in a flash.
“My door is what?!” he whispers furiously.
However, Ohno doesn’t reply, instead squeezing into the center of the bed between Aiba and Jun. He wraps an arm around Aiba’s neck, and Aiba wriggles, letting out a tiny giggle.
A couple of seconds later, Jun can feel Ohno’s arm thrown across his chest to twine with Nino’s own stubby fingers on Jun’s other side.
“…I am so putting up the inside latch tomorrow night so nobody comes and tries to colonise my bed,” Jun mutters after a while of silence.
Sho lets out a snore at that precise moment, and Nino shakes his head, flicking Jun’s side with the hand not tangled in Ohno’s.
“Nah,” he says. “You know you love us too much.”
Aiba snuggles up more against Jun in his sleep, and Jun sighs.
“Mark my words, Ninomiya.”
The next night, they reach Osaka.
Once again Nino manages to steal Jun’s spare room key when he’s not looking. Slipping out of his own room around a quarter to midnight, he tiptoes across the hallway in hotel slippers to Jun’s room. Slowly, he slips in the key, and pushes the door open when the key reader flashes green.
The door has not been latched from the inside.
Nino is under the blankets and grabbing the spare pillow before Jun looks up from his book and notices him.
“…You’re here again,” Jun observes.
Nino says nothing, but steals Jun’s pillow as well when he isn’t looking.
“I’m a pillow ninja,” he says, grinning as he waggles his eyebrows in response to Jun’s scowl.
Jun opens his mouth to retort, but ends up having all the breath knocked out of him by an overly exuberant Aiba.
“Pillow ninjas?” asks Aiba, eyes sparkling.
Sighing, Jun decides not to reply, instead trying to pry Aiba’s hands off his hair.
His fingers touch something cold and sticky, and he freezes.
“Aiba,” Jun says, in the calmest voice he can muster. “Is that jam on your fingers?”
“…Maybe?”
Jun resists a strong urge to facepalm.
“Oh my god. Aiba, go wash your hands. Now.”
Nino laughs, swathed so thickly in blanket he almost resembles an uncooked spring roll. Jun lets out another sigh, and rubs his temples.
“I am going to get a migraine in the morning.”
“…Love you too, J.”
fin.