Just Foolin'
Title: Just Foolin'
Author: scarysnapey
Word Count: 354
Rating: PG13
Warning: Language
A/N: I have no idea what this is. Inspired by illusionrain who said that Bellatrix could never fall in love with Remus. And the whole thing spiraled down hill from there. So... minor crack?
OMG NEW TAG FOR SIRIUS! EVERYONE GASP. Wow. I've really never written him....? That's weird....
He’s not even cute.
Bellatrix has heard about Werewolf Sex. It’s supposed to be legendary, hence the capital letters. But this guy? Really? He’s a bloody stick of a boy, drowning his sorrows (of which there are obviously many, judging by the state of his clothes) in another pint.
“Are you sure, Cissy?”
Narcissa isn’t paying the slightest bit of attention. She’s filing her nails irritably in the corner. “How the Hell should I know, Bella? I heard a rumor. I made the mistake of telling you, and now I’m spending my bachelorette party in some seedy pub, stalking some icky guy.”
Now Bellatrix is the one not paying attention. Her hands are busy adjusting her brassiere, attempting to force her breasts to bubble slightly over. “I’m making a move, Cissy.”
Narcissa doesn’t look up as Bellatrix lurches away from the table. She just mutters to herself, “Bloody wedding- fucking tomorrow- Lucius’s not gunna want to marry someone who smells like a drunkard- bitch- whore- probably not even true.”
Bellatrix is long gone, however, and is instead perching on a stool next to the young man. “I’ve heard that you’re an animal in bed.” She cuts straight to the chase.
Remus turns to look at her, blinking oddly. He speaks with a strange, detached tone, but the recognition in his eyes is unmistakable. Even seven years out of Hogwarts, Bellatrix Lestrange is fairly well known. “Why, yes, I am.”
Bellatrix beams. Score. “How about you prove it to me.” She runs her hands up his arms. He blinks.
Suddenly someone is behind him, wrapping stronger, muscled arms around the young man. “Cousin dearest!” the man barks in an amused baritone. “He would, but he’s quite against cross breeding and all that. And after all, what but another animal could satisfy him?”
Remus gives her an odd, still detached, smirk as Sirius Black leads him from the premises. Bellatrix scowles, hand twitching toward her wand. Just as she is about to draw it-
“BELLA! I want a proper party!”
Fuck. Bellatrix stomps back to her sister’s side. Oh, she’ll kill Sirius Black one day. Mutt.
Author: scarysnapey
Word Count: 354
Rating: PG13
Warning: Language
A/N: I have no idea what this is. Inspired by illusionrain who said that Bellatrix could never fall in love with Remus. And the whole thing spiraled down hill from there. So... minor crack?
OMG NEW TAG FOR SIRIUS! EVERYONE GASP. Wow. I've really never written him....? That's weird....
He’s not even cute.
Bellatrix has heard about Werewolf Sex. It’s supposed to be legendary, hence the capital letters. But this guy? Really? He’s a bloody stick of a boy, drowning his sorrows (of which there are obviously many, judging by the state of his clothes) in another pint.
“Are you sure, Cissy?”
Narcissa isn’t paying the slightest bit of attention. She’s filing her nails irritably in the corner. “How the Hell should I know, Bella? I heard a rumor. I made the mistake of telling you, and now I’m spending my bachelorette party in some seedy pub, stalking some icky guy.”
Now Bellatrix is the one not paying attention. Her hands are busy adjusting her brassiere, attempting to force her breasts to bubble slightly over. “I’m making a move, Cissy.”
Narcissa doesn’t look up as Bellatrix lurches away from the table. She just mutters to herself, “Bloody wedding- fucking tomorrow- Lucius’s not gunna want to marry someone who smells like a drunkard- bitch- whore- probably not even true.”
Bellatrix is long gone, however, and is instead perching on a stool next to the young man. “I’ve heard that you’re an animal in bed.” She cuts straight to the chase.
Remus turns to look at her, blinking oddly. He speaks with a strange, detached tone, but the recognition in his eyes is unmistakable. Even seven years out of Hogwarts, Bellatrix Lestrange is fairly well known. “Why, yes, I am.”
Bellatrix beams. Score. “How about you prove it to me.” She runs her hands up his arms. He blinks.
Suddenly someone is behind him, wrapping stronger, muscled arms around the young man. “Cousin dearest!” the man barks in an amused baritone. “He would, but he’s quite against cross breeding and all that. And after all, what but another animal could satisfy him?”
Remus gives her an odd, still detached, smirk as Sirius Black leads him from the premises. Bellatrix scowles, hand twitching toward her wand. Just as she is about to draw it-
“BELLA! I want a proper party!”
Fuck. Bellatrix stomps back to her sister’s side. Oh, she’ll kill Sirius Black one day. Mutt.