(no subject)
If I just sorted out a few filters on here and tidied things up a little it might make things a lot easier. There's still a lot going on.
I suspected last time I posted that I might be relapsing and I am. I simply can't function normally again and am going through the motions, having heard for 18+ months about how things "get better" or to look after myself. As Scotty pointed out earlier in the week...I've done all that. I don't play games with people and I quite frankly don't have the inclination to allow anyone to do so with me.
I hear on a daily basis about how shitty single dads are and how terrible it must be. Unless you have been there, you do not know the half of it, particularly given the way things have gone down.
Worryingly I blacked out again today. This was for nine hours- there's just a gap. I can't have left the house and it doesn't look like I've done anything but still.
So i have my kids this weekend and it will just be me. hat single dad thing where they pick the kids up and do rollercoasters and have SUCH A EAT TIME EVERY DADDY TIME is the furthest thing from the truth. it's worry about coping and wonder if you will be able to do this forever.
I suspected last time I posted that I might be relapsing and I am. I simply can't function normally again and am going through the motions, having heard for 18+ months about how things "get better" or to look after myself. As Scotty pointed out earlier in the week...I've done all that. I don't play games with people and I quite frankly don't have the inclination to allow anyone to do so with me.
I hear on a daily basis about how shitty single dads are and how terrible it must be. Unless you have been there, you do not know the half of it, particularly given the way things have gone down.
Worryingly I blacked out again today. This was for nine hours- there's just a gap. I can't have left the house and it doesn't look like I've done anything but still.
So i have my kids this weekend and it will just be me. hat single dad thing where they pick the kids up and do rollercoasters and have SUCH A EAT TIME EVERY DADDY TIME is the furthest thing from the truth. it's worry about coping and wonder if you will be able to do this forever.