ST:AOS km_anthology fic, 'Gotta Start Somewhere'
Title: Gotta Start Somewhere
Author:
scary_sushi
Rating: NC-17/Adult
Words: 3,601.
Prompt: Dildos.
Summary: So infinite and scary too // Just ask for it // And it's coming true. Leonard appreciates his prostate. Jim wants to appreciate his.
Notes/Warnings: Some OCs. Some ill-fated colors for sex toys and aliens. Some swearing. Some awkwardness. Thank you Em for the beta! Title, summary lyrics and cut text from "Gotta Start Somewhere" by Jon Brion. Written for the km_antology 2010.
The first time Leonard tries it he's fifteen, on his own, with dappled sunlight streaming through his bedroom window.
It's summer and warm, with no need for artificial temperature control at home, and he's really glad for it because with his ass in the air the continuous blast of cold air would be really uncomfortable. He wiggles a little and knows he must be frowning; it's inherent to the idea of having something up his ass, he thinks. He's started with fingers (his own, of course), but he hasn't been able to find his prostate. And he really wants to find it, because it feels really good just to press on his perineum, and he really wants...
He just wants to try it, dammit. And this purple silicone thing isn't really making things easy. At least it's slim: it must be the width of two of his fingers at most, and it burns going in and out, but just a little. If he goes real slow--
He gasps when his experimental jiggling makes the soft head skid over something inside him, and his hips jerk. God, that does feel good. He'll need a lot of practice.
*
The first time Leonard tries it with someone else they take turns.
Peter Wu is small, slim and narrow, but he looks at Leonard like he wants to suck his cock all the damn time. He's in nursing school and his building shares half its facilities with Ole Miss' med school: Leonard sees Peter Wu at least once a day. It doesn't take long before they're having beers together and then sharing more personal body fluids.
It's Leonard's first time fucking another man and it's glorious. Peter's so tight it feels like Leonard has to empty half the bottle of lube just to thrust smoothly in and out of him and he loves it, loves listening to him moan, loves being able to grasp at hips without having to worry about leaving bruises. He loses it ten thrusts in but Peter comes with him, so it isn't too embarrassing.
It turns out Peter's a size queen, and while he enjoys fucking Leonard, nothing turns him on more than some hard, veined, cut, black dildo pushing into Leonard when Peter rides him. Four months in and they don't even face each other anymore when they fuck, Leonard on his back watching Peter's ass clench around him, Peter's spine arch while his deltoid and teres major work frantically to jab Leonard ruthlessly with whichever one of Peter's toys had been closest as they fell into bed.
It leaves him sore, but it's good. Yeah, it's real good.
Leonard doesn't feel too guilty when Peter graduates and mournfully announces he's moving to Atlanta, even though his asshole twinges just a little with something like regret.
*
Leonard doesn't dare mention it to Jocelyn. Her moue the first time they'd tried to laugh about sex shops should have clued him in, really. That's one time listening to the smaller head might have proved useful.
*
The first time Leonard tries it with a woman he's fresh out of his first Academy year and he's just passed Basic Flying. He's gone with Jim to a bar to get stone cold drunk because he swears he's never again stepping on a flying tin can and there she is, all luscious lips and a predatory smile. Leonard's seen her around, of course, a chemical engineering postgrad working on ecological photosynthetic biopolymer scaffolds: she's usually on the fourth floor of the Starfleet Medical Academy but she introduced herself to him when he was making his rounds.
Come to think of it, he thinks in his increasingly alcohol-muddled haze, he's seen her pretty damn regularly around the clinic, too. Like clockwork. He doesn't even try pointing her in Jim's direction because, amazingly, the brat is actually hanging back and watching. It's fucking patronizing is what it is, but Pr'ill is purring next to his ear and he really can't give a shit, not now. The adrenaline isn't wearing off so he goes with her, all tight muscles and a soft blue skin simile and a fucking supple forked tongue.
He forgets Jim's eyes as she throws him on the bed and rips his pants off him and rubs all along him. Her kisses are savage and it's just as well, because all his Southern gentility seems to have fled when he landed that damn Starfleet shuttle successfully. He scratches and bites at her but it's okay because she's just as broad as he is, and three times as strong.
The best part, though, the best part is when her tail unfurls from her waist, steadying them as Leonard's pounding into her. The end of her appendage is cool, covered in tiny smooth scales that feel silky under his tongue. He just moans when she grabs the headboard and the tip of her tail invades his mouth and he licks until the rounded extremity is dripping, his hands gripping and rubbing her chest so hard he's damn happy she doesn't have human breasts, and even happier that her species' os clitoridis is located on her torso.
It's good, so good to have something force itself into him that he's almost delirious with pleasure already. But when that wet tip whips around him to nudge at his opening she doesn't even have time to fuck herself into him that he's coming so hard his vision whites out.
Pr'ill just chuckles. The sound, smoky and dark, is the one Leonard comes back to with a gasp because that tail is now rubbing inside him, right up on his prostate, then deeper, so fucking deep it feels like Pr'ill is plundering his throat. He gasps and thrashes, grunts and pleads incoherently but she just holds him down, pinning him, biting his neck and he comes again with a pathetic little spurt, without her needing to touch him.
Her scales are damn well fantastic, self-cleansing with her natural oil. He falls asleep, head pillowed on her chest while she pets him soothingly: fucking unbelievable that he's just been fucked dry and he isn't even sore.
*
The first time Leonard tries something like it with Jim, they haven't been doing this--them--for very long. As his finger slips into the cleft between Jim's muscled cheeks Jim tenses, his mouth going rigid against Leonard's own and his tongue retreating. The subsequent seconds are mightily awkard as Leonard edges his fingers away warily and the mood is definitely gone: both their erections are flagging, and quickly at that. Jim is already sitting on the edge of the bed and him bolting looks to be in the very-near future. The atmosphere's so tense you could cut it with a butter knife; Jim's head is hanging low and his knuckles are white where he's gripping his own knees, making them an angry red. It's all a bit surprising, and frankly, just a little ridiculous--they're fucking going to talk about this, dammit.
Leonard, still supine, asks.
"It's nothing," Jim spits out, low and angry.
Leonard's eyebrow just rises. They've rutted against each other, exchanged handjobs--fast at first, then damn slow, Jim figuring out they could lie down to do it, that they could also kiss at the same time-- and Leonard's recently blown Jim out of his mind. So Jim hasn't exactly been a shrinking violet since they first started. He's gathered Jim's not done this before, though, he'd gotten that much out of him.
"Drop it, Bones." Jim is trying to be threatening but it fails in a spectacular manner.
"Does that mean you'll object if I want to get fucked too?" Leonard isn't letting it lie, dammit. He's seen Jim's cock in all its glory and he wants it, he wants it in his hand, insides him, any way he can get it. That's the one thing on his mind as he presses two fingers in his mouth, sucking on them quickly and heedless of Jim's strangled gasp as he watches.
"Bones, what are you--Fuck."
Jim swears when Leonard just spreads his legs and pushes up on his heels, his saliva-coated fingers pressing quickly inside him as he bears down on them with just a hint of a wince. His second arm is busy providing him balance in his precarious position so he can't really reach his cock, but goddamn it's hot to watch Jim's blue eyes widen and his mouth go slack, watch Jim's hips twitch to the ghost rhythm of his fingers sinking into his ass faster and faster, watch Jim lick his lips and whimper.
"Yeah, Jim, just like that. Not for you if you don't want it, but--" It sounds like buuuu-hh, Leonard's fingers finally nudging his prostate and bearing on it, the sensation on top of what's essentially a dry fuck bursting inside him, down all his limbs, pleasure tinged with hot good pain as he tenses everywhere. He's close, so very close, but he just can't come without anything touching his cock, not on his own, and he wants to cry in frustration because Jim's right there--
"Yeah Bones, I am, want it, c'mon, come for me, yeah, just like that," and that's when Leonard realizes Jim's fist is pumping his cock and Jim's lips are nuzzling his throat and Jim's hand is gripping his hair so tight it fucking hurts, and he comes like a freight train.
"You're loud," Jim finally says when they both calm down.
"You came too, you little fuck." Leonard's too tired to indulge Jim's habit of poking at him. His hand just tightens on Jim's shoulder, and it feels good to be lying naked with him, damp skin to damp skin with nothing in between.
" Yeah." Jim snuffles at him and he really looks like a damn dog trying to burrow under him, and fuck if he doesn't think it makes the kid adorable. He snaps out of a light doze when Jim speaks again. "You really enjoy it?" Jim is definitely not looking at him.
"One of my favorite things in bed," Leonard answers truthfully. "I tend to like it bigger, harder. Haven't met many who don't enjoy just fingers, though." He thinks he feels Jim whimper, but he's far too sleepy to care.
*
The first time Leonard tries to fuck Jim it's a disaster.
Jim's fucked him a few times, but only at Leonard's insistence, and two of his fingers have found themselves inside Jim a few times too. But that's mostly it, and Jim's set and determined face isn't doing much to ease Leonard into, well, performing.
"C'mon, Bones. Do it."
"You sure, Jim?" He frowns.
"Fuck you, don't you think I know what I want?"
Jim's belligerent, and, well--they have to start somewhere. This is definitely not perfect, what with Jim just turning up at his door at the end of his shift and looking like hell. Leonard had said so, of course, but politeness and tact were never what Jim possessed when high strung, and Leonard refuses to antagonize him any further. Spock does it enough for the both of them. Okay, no more thoughts of Spock, not when Jim's undressing, his face unreadable.
Leonard undresses as well, and there's an awkwardness in the air that hadn't existed before. it feels dirty, like a necessary transaction, but Jim suddenly kisses him and all those thoughts fly out the metaphorical window. Jim's warm and smells good and has octopus hands that reach everywhere, and it doesn't take long for them to be horizontal, Leonard pressing Jim into the bedding as his fingers get busy fondling Jim's ass, spreading his cheeks and seeking the small opening. Soon lube is on Leonard and in Jim, and there's not much left for Leonard to do but go at it.
Jim hasn't really spoken, and it still feels like a business transaction, especially when faced with Jim's nape and not his face. It makes Leonard shiver, but it isn't enough for his erection to flag, not in the face of a perfect Adonis on his stomach and spread out for him. So he moves closer. And tries.
"Jim, you're too tense, you gotta relax for this to work," he hisses. His cock is nudging at Jim's hole with everything all overly lubed, but Jim is clenched and tight all over, whole body jumping at each of Leonard's tiny thrusts towards him. He isn't making a sound, so Leonard continues with the soft movements until he forces half his cockhead through Jim's pucker and Jim just shivers and moans, and it isn't a moan of anything but pain. "Fuckfuckfuck, Jim, talk to me, come on--" Jim is so tight around him it's painful, and even with all the lube his cock's just not sliding in, and pushing more just feels so wrong. "--what's wrong, Jim, do I stop? Tell me to stop!" Leonard's afraid to move and the dread pooling in his stomach is just-- God, Jim--
"T-too big, you're too big." Jim finally stutters out in a pained gasp, and there's nothing left to do for Leonard but to pull out of him excruciatingly slowly. There's not even a fifth of him in Jim, and he's definitely not that well-endowed, and he just fucking knew Jim had hang-ups about doing this and still let himself be talked into it.
Fuck.
He's sitting there, elbows on his knees and staring alternatively at his soft cock and at Jim's back, which is turned away from him with the delectable swell of his ass still shiny from all the lube. "You moron," Leonard finally says. "What in the goddamn universe were you trying to prove?"
When Jim doesn't answer, Leonard gingerly reaches out to run his fingers through Jim's damp hair at the back of his neck. "Not everyone likes it, Jim."
Jim turns towards him in a flash. "You like it well enough!" he accuses. His eyes are blazing and his cheeks are flushed. Leonard thinks it's shame displayed on Jim's features, and that's one emotion that doesn't suit his Jim. Not ever. Now to wipe it off Jim's face.
"That's because I didn't jump into the deep end."
"Well, how else you gonna make it good? I thought that was the point, for you to fuck me and me to fuck you and how am I supposed to do this if I can't even take it?"
It's like someone struck Leonard with lightening, and it takes him a good minute to wrap his head around Jim's fucked-up argument. "Fuck you, kid," he finally bites out. "It's not tit for tat. I have some finesse. Now turn over and let me do this properly."
Jim just stares at him.
"You idiot." Leonard's kiss is rough and needy, his teeth pulling at Jim's bottom lip and driving a whimper out of him. "I'll make it good, I swear to you. Make you see so many stars you'll never want to come out of the bedroom."
Jim just chuckles breathlessly, more himself than since he came into Leonard's room, and turns over. Slowly. "You gonna fuck me, Bones?"
"No, you little shit." He comes right up to Jim and tilts his narrow hips up, nudging him on all fours. "I'm just gonna fondle you till you come and then come on you." A full body shudder wracks Jim's frame, and even Leonard's surprised at how his voice cracks when he asks, "Comfortable?"
"A little exposed here, Bones," Jim ends up saying, trying to sound light.
"This'll make it better for you, but we can have you on your knees and leaning against the headboard," Leonard offers him. He runs a soothing palm over Jim's shoulders and back, humming a little as he lets Jim decide.
Jim takes a deep breath and lets some tension flow out of his shoulders. "Maybe next time."
And just like that, Leonard's so hard even his balls are tight. He groans as he spreads out on top of Jim, mouthing quick kisses on the sharp shoulderblades and licking the freckles dotting the strong back. His hands are busy, one pulling leisurely at Jim's cock and the other massaging the spread cheeks, his palm rhythmically brushing against Jim's hole. Jim just sighs and sinks down on his elbows, head lowering in between his forearms.
"Talk to me, Jim. Tell me." Leonard's whisper is harsh.
"Feels good, Bones. Your mouth--" He exhales in a gasp as Leonard's tongue traces his spine in a long drag. "Warm. Wet."
"What about my hands?" Leonard's grabbed more lube and his coated fingers are at Jim's entrance. The fact that Jim is on his knees makes it easier and they just sink in. He caresses Jim's inner muscles as his other hand continues to shuttle on Jim's cock, and Jim's had this before, he's come from this before, and it isn't long before he's pushing back against Leonard's fingers and into Leonard's loose fist with a litany of Bonesbonesbonesbones.
Jim whimpers when his fingers leave him, but he's too busy panting to hear Leonard rummaging through his drawers, his hand closing on the hard glass he's been thinking of since Jim has turned over and presented him with his ass.
The dildo is moss green and translucent, and Leonard's slippery fingers coat its surface within seconds. It's still cold when he presses it to Jim's ass but rubs it back and forth Jim's cleft as he kisses Jim's shoulder, trying to ride out Jim's jerk.
"Is this..." Jim cranes his neck trying to see the dildo.
"Yeah. " Leonard shifts to show it to Jim, and his insides tingle at Jim's sudden intake of breath. "It isn't thick, see? It'll go in real smooth."
Jim eyes the toy for a few moments, then deliberately turns back and drops his head between his arms."You said your toys weren't for sharing."
"That one is. Sterile and antibacterial. When I wash it myself, of course. Too small for me, so it'll be yours." And he presses the smooth tapered end to Jim's hole. The glass slides in immediately with Jim moaning, and Leonard works it slowly into him. He takes his time, hand swathing at Jim's hip when Jim huffs and wiggles, growing harder at the sight of the glass being swallowed by Jim's body.
He's happy he went slow because suddenly Jim tenses. The tapered end of the dildo has been flaring out and it's already halfway in, but Leonard can see Jim's hole starting to work frenetically against the hard glass shaft as Jim pants, and he has to press to keep the toy where it is.
"Take it easy, Jim. Easy, easy. It may feel like there's no room, but this isn't much more than my fingers, so you know you can take it. Just breathe. Try to relax. Yeah, Jimmy, just like that." Leonard murmurs and mutters against Jim's hip, his other hand holding Jim steady, and he feels it when Jim relaxes, his pelvis dropping and inadvertently taking in the dildo a few millimeters deeper. Jim's pants are steady now, an in-out-in-out of slightly panicked but aroused breaths, and his cock is still half-hard. Leonard keeps a steady pressure on the toy and moves to rub large circles on Jim's back. "How does it feel?"
"Dun' call me Jimmy, Bonesy," Jim chokes out.
"If you can be a smartass, kid, then it mustn't be too bad." He pushes the dildo just a little deeper, cutting Jim's breathless chuckle short.
"Feels strange. Hard. Full--Fuller than fingers." He hisses as Leonard continues pushing. "Burns. How much more?"
"You're hitting the base. You're doing real good, Jim. Just a little more." Jim's back ripples and he whines, head lurching forward and hips jerking as the flared glass base finally comes to rest against his distended hole. His thighs tremble and his fists are clenching the sheets so hard it's a wonder they haven't ripped.
Leonard has selfishly never been prouder of him.
And just like that, his need hits him so hard it's a wonder he doesn't topple. Jim still isn't moving when Leonard slides behind him to fit his thighs to Jim's trembling inner thighs and push outwards, his left hand steadying Jim's lowering hip as his right hand goes back to Jim's cock. Jim flattens himself to the bed with a groan that sounds more like a sob, and he jerks when Leonard leans forward to blanket him, his cock pressing against the base of the dildo.
"Oh God, Bones, Bones, Bo--"
Jim devolves into high-pitched moans and shudders as Leonard ruts against him, his cock weeping precome along Jim's cleft and causing the dildo to move and tilt just a little inside him, rubbing and pressing at what Leonard knows is Jim's prostate. His hand is pulling at Jim's cock almost savagely now, and it doesn't take two strokes for Jim to come, his whole body convulsing under Leonard, and just the sound of Jim's wanton release brings him over the edge.
It takes a while for them both to become coherent again. It's Jim's squirming that does it, and it takes an infinite amount of patience to tease the dildo out of him. Orgasm seems to make his muscles contract, and Leonard thinks he won't consider taking the edge off Jim before fucking. No sucking or handjobs to completion, then, which that leaves him with...
Options swirl in his mind as he nuzzles a conked out Jim. He's got many things to think about. For next time.
the end.
Author:
scary_sushi
Rating: NC-17/Adult
Words: 3,601.
Prompt: Dildos.
Summary: So infinite and scary too // Just ask for it // And it's coming true. Leonard appreciates his prostate. Jim wants to appreciate his.
Notes/Warnings: Some OCs. Some ill-fated colors for sex toys and aliens. Some swearing. Some awkwardness. Thank you Em for the beta! Title, summary lyrics and cut text from "Gotta Start Somewhere" by Jon Brion. Written for the km_antology 2010.
The first time Leonard tries it he's fifteen, on his own, with dappled sunlight streaming through his bedroom window.
It's summer and warm, with no need for artificial temperature control at home, and he's really glad for it because with his ass in the air the continuous blast of cold air would be really uncomfortable. He wiggles a little and knows he must be frowning; it's inherent to the idea of having something up his ass, he thinks. He's started with fingers (his own, of course), but he hasn't been able to find his prostate. And he really wants to find it, because it feels really good just to press on his perineum, and he really wants...
He just wants to try it, dammit. And this purple silicone thing isn't really making things easy. At least it's slim: it must be the width of two of his fingers at most, and it burns going in and out, but just a little. If he goes real slow--
He gasps when his experimental jiggling makes the soft head skid over something inside him, and his hips jerk. God, that does feel good. He'll need a lot of practice.
*
The first time Leonard tries it with someone else they take turns.
Peter Wu is small, slim and narrow, but he looks at Leonard like he wants to suck his cock all the damn time. He's in nursing school and his building shares half its facilities with Ole Miss' med school: Leonard sees Peter Wu at least once a day. It doesn't take long before they're having beers together and then sharing more personal body fluids.
It's Leonard's first time fucking another man and it's glorious. Peter's so tight it feels like Leonard has to empty half the bottle of lube just to thrust smoothly in and out of him and he loves it, loves listening to him moan, loves being able to grasp at hips without having to worry about leaving bruises. He loses it ten thrusts in but Peter comes with him, so it isn't too embarrassing.
It turns out Peter's a size queen, and while he enjoys fucking Leonard, nothing turns him on more than some hard, veined, cut, black dildo pushing into Leonard when Peter rides him. Four months in and they don't even face each other anymore when they fuck, Leonard on his back watching Peter's ass clench around him, Peter's spine arch while his deltoid and teres major work frantically to jab Leonard ruthlessly with whichever one of Peter's toys had been closest as they fell into bed.
It leaves him sore, but it's good. Yeah, it's real good.
Leonard doesn't feel too guilty when Peter graduates and mournfully announces he's moving to Atlanta, even though his asshole twinges just a little with something like regret.
*
Leonard doesn't dare mention it to Jocelyn. Her moue the first time they'd tried to laugh about sex shops should have clued him in, really. That's one time listening to the smaller head might have proved useful.
*
The first time Leonard tries it with a woman he's fresh out of his first Academy year and he's just passed Basic Flying. He's gone with Jim to a bar to get stone cold drunk because he swears he's never again stepping on a flying tin can and there she is, all luscious lips and a predatory smile. Leonard's seen her around, of course, a chemical engineering postgrad working on ecological photosynthetic biopolymer scaffolds: she's usually on the fourth floor of the Starfleet Medical Academy but she introduced herself to him when he was making his rounds.
Come to think of it, he thinks in his increasingly alcohol-muddled haze, he's seen her pretty damn regularly around the clinic, too. Like clockwork. He doesn't even try pointing her in Jim's direction because, amazingly, the brat is actually hanging back and watching. It's fucking patronizing is what it is, but Pr'ill is purring next to his ear and he really can't give a shit, not now. The adrenaline isn't wearing off so he goes with her, all tight muscles and a soft blue skin simile and a fucking supple forked tongue.
He forgets Jim's eyes as she throws him on the bed and rips his pants off him and rubs all along him. Her kisses are savage and it's just as well, because all his Southern gentility seems to have fled when he landed that damn Starfleet shuttle successfully. He scratches and bites at her but it's okay because she's just as broad as he is, and three times as strong.
The best part, though, the best part is when her tail unfurls from her waist, steadying them as Leonard's pounding into her. The end of her appendage is cool, covered in tiny smooth scales that feel silky under his tongue. He just moans when she grabs the headboard and the tip of her tail invades his mouth and he licks until the rounded extremity is dripping, his hands gripping and rubbing her chest so hard he's damn happy she doesn't have human breasts, and even happier that her species' os clitoridis is located on her torso.
It's good, so good to have something force itself into him that he's almost delirious with pleasure already. But when that wet tip whips around him to nudge at his opening she doesn't even have time to fuck herself into him that he's coming so hard his vision whites out.
Pr'ill just chuckles. The sound, smoky and dark, is the one Leonard comes back to with a gasp because that tail is now rubbing inside him, right up on his prostate, then deeper, so fucking deep it feels like Pr'ill is plundering his throat. He gasps and thrashes, grunts and pleads incoherently but she just holds him down, pinning him, biting his neck and he comes again with a pathetic little spurt, without her needing to touch him.
Her scales are damn well fantastic, self-cleansing with her natural oil. He falls asleep, head pillowed on her chest while she pets him soothingly: fucking unbelievable that he's just been fucked dry and he isn't even sore.
*
The first time Leonard tries something like it with Jim, they haven't been doing this--them--for very long. As his finger slips into the cleft between Jim's muscled cheeks Jim tenses, his mouth going rigid against Leonard's own and his tongue retreating. The subsequent seconds are mightily awkard as Leonard edges his fingers away warily and the mood is definitely gone: both their erections are flagging, and quickly at that. Jim is already sitting on the edge of the bed and him bolting looks to be in the very-near future. The atmosphere's so tense you could cut it with a butter knife; Jim's head is hanging low and his knuckles are white where he's gripping his own knees, making them an angry red. It's all a bit surprising, and frankly, just a little ridiculous--they're fucking going to talk about this, dammit.
Leonard, still supine, asks.
"It's nothing," Jim spits out, low and angry.
Leonard's eyebrow just rises. They've rutted against each other, exchanged handjobs--fast at first, then damn slow, Jim figuring out they could lie down to do it, that they could also kiss at the same time-- and Leonard's recently blown Jim out of his mind. So Jim hasn't exactly been a shrinking violet since they first started. He's gathered Jim's not done this before, though, he'd gotten that much out of him.
"Drop it, Bones." Jim is trying to be threatening but it fails in a spectacular manner.
"Does that mean you'll object if I want to get fucked too?" Leonard isn't letting it lie, dammit. He's seen Jim's cock in all its glory and he wants it, he wants it in his hand, insides him, any way he can get it. That's the one thing on his mind as he presses two fingers in his mouth, sucking on them quickly and heedless of Jim's strangled gasp as he watches.
"Bones, what are you--Fuck."
Jim swears when Leonard just spreads his legs and pushes up on his heels, his saliva-coated fingers pressing quickly inside him as he bears down on them with just a hint of a wince. His second arm is busy providing him balance in his precarious position so he can't really reach his cock, but goddamn it's hot to watch Jim's blue eyes widen and his mouth go slack, watch Jim's hips twitch to the ghost rhythm of his fingers sinking into his ass faster and faster, watch Jim lick his lips and whimper.
"Yeah, Jim, just like that. Not for you if you don't want it, but--" It sounds like buuuu-hh, Leonard's fingers finally nudging his prostate and bearing on it, the sensation on top of what's essentially a dry fuck bursting inside him, down all his limbs, pleasure tinged with hot good pain as he tenses everywhere. He's close, so very close, but he just can't come without anything touching his cock, not on his own, and he wants to cry in frustration because Jim's right there--
"Yeah Bones, I am, want it, c'mon, come for me, yeah, just like that," and that's when Leonard realizes Jim's fist is pumping his cock and Jim's lips are nuzzling his throat and Jim's hand is gripping his hair so tight it fucking hurts, and he comes like a freight train.
"You're loud," Jim finally says when they both calm down.
"You came too, you little fuck." Leonard's too tired to indulge Jim's habit of poking at him. His hand just tightens on Jim's shoulder, and it feels good to be lying naked with him, damp skin to damp skin with nothing in between.
" Yeah." Jim snuffles at him and he really looks like a damn dog trying to burrow under him, and fuck if he doesn't think it makes the kid adorable. He snaps out of a light doze when Jim speaks again. "You really enjoy it?" Jim is definitely not looking at him.
"One of my favorite things in bed," Leonard answers truthfully. "I tend to like it bigger, harder. Haven't met many who don't enjoy just fingers, though." He thinks he feels Jim whimper, but he's far too sleepy to care.
*
The first time Leonard tries to fuck Jim it's a disaster.
Jim's fucked him a few times, but only at Leonard's insistence, and two of his fingers have found themselves inside Jim a few times too. But that's mostly it, and Jim's set and determined face isn't doing much to ease Leonard into, well, performing.
"C'mon, Bones. Do it."
"You sure, Jim?" He frowns.
"Fuck you, don't you think I know what I want?"
Jim's belligerent, and, well--they have to start somewhere. This is definitely not perfect, what with Jim just turning up at his door at the end of his shift and looking like hell. Leonard had said so, of course, but politeness and tact were never what Jim possessed when high strung, and Leonard refuses to antagonize him any further. Spock does it enough for the both of them. Okay, no more thoughts of Spock, not when Jim's undressing, his face unreadable.
Leonard undresses as well, and there's an awkwardness in the air that hadn't existed before. it feels dirty, like a necessary transaction, but Jim suddenly kisses him and all those thoughts fly out the metaphorical window. Jim's warm and smells good and has octopus hands that reach everywhere, and it doesn't take long for them to be horizontal, Leonard pressing Jim into the bedding as his fingers get busy fondling Jim's ass, spreading his cheeks and seeking the small opening. Soon lube is on Leonard and in Jim, and there's not much left for Leonard to do but go at it.
Jim hasn't really spoken, and it still feels like a business transaction, especially when faced with Jim's nape and not his face. It makes Leonard shiver, but it isn't enough for his erection to flag, not in the face of a perfect Adonis on his stomach and spread out for him. So he moves closer. And tries.
"Jim, you're too tense, you gotta relax for this to work," he hisses. His cock is nudging at Jim's hole with everything all overly lubed, but Jim is clenched and tight all over, whole body jumping at each of Leonard's tiny thrusts towards him. He isn't making a sound, so Leonard continues with the soft movements until he forces half his cockhead through Jim's pucker and Jim just shivers and moans, and it isn't a moan of anything but pain. "Fuckfuckfuck, Jim, talk to me, come on--" Jim is so tight around him it's painful, and even with all the lube his cock's just not sliding in, and pushing more just feels so wrong. "--what's wrong, Jim, do I stop? Tell me to stop!" Leonard's afraid to move and the dread pooling in his stomach is just-- God, Jim--
"T-too big, you're too big." Jim finally stutters out in a pained gasp, and there's nothing left to do for Leonard but to pull out of him excruciatingly slowly. There's not even a fifth of him in Jim, and he's definitely not that well-endowed, and he just fucking knew Jim had hang-ups about doing this and still let himself be talked into it.
Fuck.
He's sitting there, elbows on his knees and staring alternatively at his soft cock and at Jim's back, which is turned away from him with the delectable swell of his ass still shiny from all the lube. "You moron," Leonard finally says. "What in the goddamn universe were you trying to prove?"
When Jim doesn't answer, Leonard gingerly reaches out to run his fingers through Jim's damp hair at the back of his neck. "Not everyone likes it, Jim."
Jim turns towards him in a flash. "You like it well enough!" he accuses. His eyes are blazing and his cheeks are flushed. Leonard thinks it's shame displayed on Jim's features, and that's one emotion that doesn't suit his Jim. Not ever. Now to wipe it off Jim's face.
"That's because I didn't jump into the deep end."
"Well, how else you gonna make it good? I thought that was the point, for you to fuck me and me to fuck you and how am I supposed to do this if I can't even take it?"
It's like someone struck Leonard with lightening, and it takes him a good minute to wrap his head around Jim's fucked-up argument. "Fuck you, kid," he finally bites out. "It's not tit for tat. I have some finesse. Now turn over and let me do this properly."
Jim just stares at him.
"You idiot." Leonard's kiss is rough and needy, his teeth pulling at Jim's bottom lip and driving a whimper out of him. "I'll make it good, I swear to you. Make you see so many stars you'll never want to come out of the bedroom."
Jim just chuckles breathlessly, more himself than since he came into Leonard's room, and turns over. Slowly. "You gonna fuck me, Bones?"
"No, you little shit." He comes right up to Jim and tilts his narrow hips up, nudging him on all fours. "I'm just gonna fondle you till you come and then come on you." A full body shudder wracks Jim's frame, and even Leonard's surprised at how his voice cracks when he asks, "Comfortable?"
"A little exposed here, Bones," Jim ends up saying, trying to sound light.
"This'll make it better for you, but we can have you on your knees and leaning against the headboard," Leonard offers him. He runs a soothing palm over Jim's shoulders and back, humming a little as he lets Jim decide.
Jim takes a deep breath and lets some tension flow out of his shoulders. "Maybe next time."
And just like that, Leonard's so hard even his balls are tight. He groans as he spreads out on top of Jim, mouthing quick kisses on the sharp shoulderblades and licking the freckles dotting the strong back. His hands are busy, one pulling leisurely at Jim's cock and the other massaging the spread cheeks, his palm rhythmically brushing against Jim's hole. Jim just sighs and sinks down on his elbows, head lowering in between his forearms.
"Talk to me, Jim. Tell me." Leonard's whisper is harsh.
"Feels good, Bones. Your mouth--" He exhales in a gasp as Leonard's tongue traces his spine in a long drag. "Warm. Wet."
"What about my hands?" Leonard's grabbed more lube and his coated fingers are at Jim's entrance. The fact that Jim is on his knees makes it easier and they just sink in. He caresses Jim's inner muscles as his other hand continues to shuttle on Jim's cock, and Jim's had this before, he's come from this before, and it isn't long before he's pushing back against Leonard's fingers and into Leonard's loose fist with a litany of Bonesbonesbonesbones.
Jim whimpers when his fingers leave him, but he's too busy panting to hear Leonard rummaging through his drawers, his hand closing on the hard glass he's been thinking of since Jim has turned over and presented him with his ass.
The dildo is moss green and translucent, and Leonard's slippery fingers coat its surface within seconds. It's still cold when he presses it to Jim's ass but rubs it back and forth Jim's cleft as he kisses Jim's shoulder, trying to ride out Jim's jerk.
"Is this..." Jim cranes his neck trying to see the dildo.
"Yeah. " Leonard shifts to show it to Jim, and his insides tingle at Jim's sudden intake of breath. "It isn't thick, see? It'll go in real smooth."
Jim eyes the toy for a few moments, then deliberately turns back and drops his head between his arms."You said your toys weren't for sharing."
"That one is. Sterile and antibacterial. When I wash it myself, of course. Too small for me, so it'll be yours." And he presses the smooth tapered end to Jim's hole. The glass slides in immediately with Jim moaning, and Leonard works it slowly into him. He takes his time, hand swathing at Jim's hip when Jim huffs and wiggles, growing harder at the sight of the glass being swallowed by Jim's body.
He's happy he went slow because suddenly Jim tenses. The tapered end of the dildo has been flaring out and it's already halfway in, but Leonard can see Jim's hole starting to work frenetically against the hard glass shaft as Jim pants, and he has to press to keep the toy where it is.
"Take it easy, Jim. Easy, easy. It may feel like there's no room, but this isn't much more than my fingers, so you know you can take it. Just breathe. Try to relax. Yeah, Jimmy, just like that." Leonard murmurs and mutters against Jim's hip, his other hand holding Jim steady, and he feels it when Jim relaxes, his pelvis dropping and inadvertently taking in the dildo a few millimeters deeper. Jim's pants are steady now, an in-out-in-out of slightly panicked but aroused breaths, and his cock is still half-hard. Leonard keeps a steady pressure on the toy and moves to rub large circles on Jim's back. "How does it feel?"
"Dun' call me Jimmy, Bonesy," Jim chokes out.
"If you can be a smartass, kid, then it mustn't be too bad." He pushes the dildo just a little deeper, cutting Jim's breathless chuckle short.
"Feels strange. Hard. Full--Fuller than fingers." He hisses as Leonard continues pushing. "Burns. How much more?"
"You're hitting the base. You're doing real good, Jim. Just a little more." Jim's back ripples and he whines, head lurching forward and hips jerking as the flared glass base finally comes to rest against his distended hole. His thighs tremble and his fists are clenching the sheets so hard it's a wonder they haven't ripped.
Leonard has selfishly never been prouder of him.
And just like that, his need hits him so hard it's a wonder he doesn't topple. Jim still isn't moving when Leonard slides behind him to fit his thighs to Jim's trembling inner thighs and push outwards, his left hand steadying Jim's lowering hip as his right hand goes back to Jim's cock. Jim flattens himself to the bed with a groan that sounds more like a sob, and he jerks when Leonard leans forward to blanket him, his cock pressing against the base of the dildo.
"Oh God, Bones, Bones, Bo--"
Jim devolves into high-pitched moans and shudders as Leonard ruts against him, his cock weeping precome along Jim's cleft and causing the dildo to move and tilt just a little inside him, rubbing and pressing at what Leonard knows is Jim's prostate. His hand is pulling at Jim's cock almost savagely now, and it doesn't take two strokes for Jim to come, his whole body convulsing under Leonard, and just the sound of Jim's wanton release brings him over the edge.
It takes a while for them both to become coherent again. It's Jim's squirming that does it, and it takes an infinite amount of patience to tease the dildo out of him. Orgasm seems to make his muscles contract, and Leonard thinks he won't consider taking the edge off Jim before fucking. No sucking or handjobs to completion, then, which that leaves him with...
Options swirl in his mind as he nuzzles a conked out Jim. He's got many things to think about. For next time.
the end.