the world has turned and left me here, just the way it was before you appeared

[scarsrshown]

i dont know what im going to say to him. i have to work with him tonight...and i know for a fact im going to break down in front of him... i cant face his eyes. ... omg i dont want to go to work tonight.... i feel horrible...but it wasnt my fault..it was just the breaking point. i couldnt handle it anymore. why should i be looked like that? b/c i shouldnt and i dont have too. but that doesnt mean that i dont feel fucking horrible. i loved alex. i truely did. and i was so happy.... yesterday i cried like almost all day. i was in mrs. feriah's building for the majority of school... i went to work, almost cried in front of zack... and then i went to bed... woke up ...and i cried. and im crying while i write this..... i just want everything to go away.... just leave me alone... i just want to be alone... i feel like sitting outside, but its fucking freezing out...and i dont know who to talk too...there isnt anyone i want to talk too...so im just kinda stuck, having all of these fucked up feelings controll my day...and im sorry alex, i truely am... forgive me while i broke in your hands....

laura