procrastination
Hate to:
Fold it.
Clean it.
Cook it.
Save it.
Wash it.
Dust it.
Organize it.
Tidy it.
Pay it.
File it.
Love to:
Hang-out.
Imbibe.
Watch.
Rest.
Read.
Snuggle.
Eat.
Listen.
Write.
Paint.
While I may never have enough money to pay even my most basic of bills, I need servants. Not
just any kind of servant.
No.
Skilled, energetic, charming and fun servants with lots of interesting stories that love love
love to give backrubs a la Mimi Rogers or tickle-scratch my arms when I'm watching a movie or
can't fall asleep.
I need servants that have tons of money and don't mind doing this work for me, gratis.
I need cute-looking servants. I need really upbeat, but not annoyingly-upbeat servants. I need
servants that do not disagree with me, but merely underscore my pithy insights. I'm no dictator.
I'd be so very cool to them.
I procrastinate with the skill of a professional.
Ten Ways to Do It
1. Look up words I don't understand, even though I will never ever use them. The more arcane, the better.
2. Mentally repeat: Just one more page.
3. Stare very hard at the laundry and attempt to use its' potential energy to get it to fold itself.
4. Agonize about my disorganization.
5. Make lists of 'to-do's' ...and then don't do ANY of 'em.
6. Kid myself that thinking about doing something means I actually DID something.
7. Meditate to cleanse my karma. My karma is ALWAYS in need of a touch-up. And meditating should never be confused with napping.
8. Read 'just until the end of this chapter'.
9. Play with paintshop, photoshop...basically any kind of shopping is good.
10. Get lost in a daydream.
I wonder if I am the only one? Can I polish my professional procrastinator proficiencies? If I
could only refine them to their most perfect economy of energy, I'd have more time to... erm...
procrastinate.