Fic: (Un)founded Jealousies
Title: (Un)founded Jealousies
Pairing: Eunhae/ Haehyuk
Author: scarlet_ember
Rating: PG-13 for cursing
Genre: Drama, Fluff, Romance
Summary: Donghae doesn’t like it when Hyukjae smiles that way. So he confronts him, only to end up in a fight he wasn’t even expecting.
A/N: For akihikaru , for being the best dongsaeng ever~
Donghae can see it. He’s not blind. Gullible, yes. Crybaby too, he’ll give it that. But he’s not stupid. It’s as clear as Kyu’s gaming addiction and he’s not liking one bit of it.
Hyukjae’s withdrawing from him.
And he’s not liking it one bit.
He was seeing the signs of a looming problem even before but decidedly ignoring it, opting to think it was simply his paranoia working overtime. But Hyukjae’s wearing that smile again-that one that doesn’t seem to reach his heart. It’s the same smile he saw when they bid their goodbye to the other members as they headed for China for their first mainstay activities.
And he swears he wants to punch that smile off the other’s face as they face their fans during their anniversary party. He doesn’t find it one bit amusing-this was supposed to be a very happy day, their fifth year of being together-but somehow, a small part in the corner of his heart tugs him, telling him something’s amiss with a currently smiling Hyukjae.
Expect it from his Teukkie-hyung to make him choose between Siwon and Hyukjae, when clearly the leader knows the answer. He doesn’t look at Hyukjae and chose to chat idly with Sungmin and Siwon. He caught a glimpse of a smiling Heechul (though he’s really failing in trying to hide that smile) as he partly listens to what Sungmin is saying and EunTeuk’s conversation.
“EunHae…”
His heart trickled joy when he heard it from the other. He thought that maybe, things’ll be different today.
“EunHae is… real.”
He laughed to his heart’s content, partly because of how audacious their monkey-boy could be, but mostly because of the relief he suddenly felt at that (unsolicited) confession. He saw Hyukjae laugh (or probably more like giggle) after that confession and he knew Teukkie’s just going to make him do something he’s not really up to doing. And he did.
He chose Siwon. Because for some reason, he just can’t share what he and Hyukjae have to the world… and yes, he’s a selfish bastard like that.
But Hyukjae didn’t seem to see it that way, as he caught a glimpse of the other’s smile, that one he’d do everything to protect, falter-a small twitch that none of the other members would notice. He felt guilty, and even more when a monkey and a horse had there moment and he just felt so helpless.
And there it was, a withdrawn Hyukjae again for the rest of the program. He thought it couldn’t get worse, that trying to sort this out with Hyukjae could wait, at least until all the hype’s over, and they’re not so busy with schedules and tired bodies. But then he saw it-the same face he saw about thrice in his life-that goodbye at the airport, another one in his room, and months ago when Hyukjae announced in one of their events that Kibum’s coming back soon.
It’s that expression that meant Hyukjae’s expressing a very calm attitude on the outside but running a zillion miles in his mind with so many things to think about-all related either to him, or their relationship.
And he felt helpless, he wanted things to stop right then and there so he could grab Hyukjae and shake him to oblivion, asking him what’s wrong. But he forced a smile, as Teukkie reiterated what Hyukjae said, both of them biting back something threatening to fall from their eyes for the wrong reasons.
“Super Junior-M is already back to the studios recording, and preparing a comeback.”
It has always been an unspoken issue between them-China. Neither of them wanted to admit their real take on the issue because none of them wanted to say something that might hurt the other’s feelings. So they kept it shut, tucked within the crevices of their ice-thin relationship until at that moment backstage after the party, Donghae chose to save them and stabilize on solid ground.
“Hyuk…” he motioned towards the other after closing the door. The other was on the other end of the room, trying to fix his bag.
“Hmm?”
“Everything’s gonna be okay… you know that, right?” He settled on the same table as Hyukjae’s bag, watching the other continue with the bag.
A smile. A nervous one. “What are you talking about? Of course, Hae.”
He can’t seem to put his point across.
“You know what I’m talking about, Hyukjae. It’s not going to be like that anymore.” He saw the other stop, breath deeply, then walk across the room to fix things that doesn’t need fixing.
“I don’t see the point in talking about this, Donghae. You’ve said that before, and look what happened. One thing I learned is that we never should say something we’re not really sure of. At least-“
“That was years ago, and yes, at that time, things didn’t happen as planned, but Hyuk, it’s not like I’m doing this just because I want that to happen again. And it’s not like everything’s my fault.”
Two bags were dropped on the floor, as Hyukjae turned towards him, face contorted with something similar to anger and pain.
“Oh, so now you’re blaming it on me? Donghae, you were in China. For a year. I may not have been able to answer every single call you made, but at least, when I answered, you don’t hear partying on the background or a bandmate’s hard and labored breathing on the background in the middle of the night!”
Tears found their way to Hyukjae’s eyes again. This wasn’t part of his plan, for these issues to resurface. He thought these were all resolved, as they patched things up after months of fighting, not talking, and fighting again after he returned from China.
“Hyuk, I’m not blaming you. Not at all. I just-“
“Oh, and the first person YOU call about your drama, in Taiwan where else, with that-that slut is Kibum! Ki-fucking-bum! And you expect me not to feel anything about that? And now that Kibum’s coming back, am I supposed to just stay in the background because the high and mighty KiHae is back? Because KiHae is your original pair, and I’ll remain tucked here, hidden within the confines of our so-called private lives?”
He was dumbfounded. He wasn’t expecting their issues-or more like, Hyukjae’s issues, to be this deep. The other was heaving now, crying, although trying to stop as much as he can.
“Hyukkie…”
“Don’t you fucking Hyukkie me, Donghae! You have no idea, no idea at all, how scared I am living everyday, waiting for the other shoe to drop. It’s like, you’re going to leave me once you realize that what we have isn’t for you, and I’m going to lose you to someone any time.”
His heart is breaking at how wrong Hyukjae’s thoughts are, and feeling helpless at the situation, all he could do at the moment is hug him with everything he has, hoping that every bit of his answer is conveyed through it.
“I’m not going anywhere, Hyukkie. And you’re not going to lose me to anyone.” He released himself from the hug and made the other face him, with snot, tears and all.
“Stop waiting, because the other shoe’s never going to drop,” he heard the other chuckle, “or however you mean by that. What happened before, when you called, it’s not going to happen again. You have to remember, this relationship is as important to me as it is to you. Hyuk, when all of this is over-that drama, the fan services, the shining lights, there’s nothing else left for me but this-what we have. Do you understand me, Hyukkie?”
A nod. A hiccup. A sniff.
“He’s coming back, you know.” For a second, he forgot who Hyukjae was talking about. He chuckled at the other’s very old issue, earning him a smack in the chest.
“Yah. Nothing’s funny.”
“Hyuk, you’re still not over that issue? Come on, you’re practically our group’s ace and you feel insecure about Kibummie?”
“Super Junior’s relationship with each other and our relationship are two different things, Hae. You know I don’t like you being all Kibummie with him.”
If there’s one thing Donghae would trade anything for, it would have to be Hyukjae being all jealous and possessive over him-specially against those people he never really should’ve bothered being jealous of.
“I love you. But not the same way as I love anyone else. So don’t think that way. I must say, this is the most dramatic I’ve seen you yet.”
“I’m sorry for the drama. I swear, this is just stress. But don’t push it, seriously.”
“Okay, I’m sorry. And seriously, we’re okay, right?”
A kiss.
“You really should stop watching all those late night dramas, Hyukkie.”
“Yeah, and you should really stop crying, Hae”
They laughed, and finally, Donghae saw the smile he’s always been living for. He whispered an I love you to the other’s hair as they hugged, and he felt the other smile wider, as impossible as that may sound at the moment. His heart tripped badly back then after China, and he’s going to do everything he can for things like that not to happen again. He may be the group’s cry baby for crying so easily, but his heart isn’t as fragile as people might think. He’s not as fragile as his Hyukjae’s heart… easily hurt but the hardest to recover. So he’ll protect it, and their relationship, and make it last. If Kangin-hyung and Teukkie-hyung lasted that long, why couldn’t he and Hyukjae?
He heard bustles outside, signaling that their moment’s over and should be caught, their alone time will be stretched to its thinnest, all thanks to the currently bitter leader.
But he wasn’t ready to let go yet, and neither is Hyukjae by the looks of it. As the door opened, revealing a sneaky looking Heechul, they exchanged looks, somehow conversing the way only hyungs-and-dongsaengs from their region do, and Heechul smiled, winking at him as the door closes.
“I love you, Hae. But I think we have to let go now. They’re coming back.”
And he hugged the other tighter as he heard Heechul shouting to the other members to proceed to the other room because he just thought of some clever game he’s going to post to twitvid. Trust his hyung to know everything even before anyone else does.
“Nah, we still have enough time. Want to do something else?”
Pairing: Eunhae/ Haehyuk
Author: scarlet_ember
Rating: PG-13 for cursing
Genre: Drama, Fluff, Romance
Summary: Donghae doesn’t like it when Hyukjae smiles that way. So he confronts him, only to end up in a fight he wasn’t even expecting.
A/N: For akihikaru , for being the best dongsaeng ever~
Donghae can see it. He’s not blind. Gullible, yes. Crybaby too, he’ll give it that. But he’s not stupid. It’s as clear as Kyu’s gaming addiction and he’s not liking one bit of it.
Hyukjae’s withdrawing from him.
And he’s not liking it one bit.
He was seeing the signs of a looming problem even before but decidedly ignoring it, opting to think it was simply his paranoia working overtime. But Hyukjae’s wearing that smile again-that one that doesn’t seem to reach his heart. It’s the same smile he saw when they bid their goodbye to the other members as they headed for China for their first mainstay activities.
And he swears he wants to punch that smile off the other’s face as they face their fans during their anniversary party. He doesn’t find it one bit amusing-this was supposed to be a very happy day, their fifth year of being together-but somehow, a small part in the corner of his heart tugs him, telling him something’s amiss with a currently smiling Hyukjae.
Expect it from his Teukkie-hyung to make him choose between Siwon and Hyukjae, when clearly the leader knows the answer. He doesn’t look at Hyukjae and chose to chat idly with Sungmin and Siwon. He caught a glimpse of a smiling Heechul (though he’s really failing in trying to hide that smile) as he partly listens to what Sungmin is saying and EunTeuk’s conversation.
“EunHae…”
His heart trickled joy when he heard it from the other. He thought that maybe, things’ll be different today.
“EunHae is… real.”
He laughed to his heart’s content, partly because of how audacious their monkey-boy could be, but mostly because of the relief he suddenly felt at that (unsolicited) confession. He saw Hyukjae laugh (or probably more like giggle) after that confession and he knew Teukkie’s just going to make him do something he’s not really up to doing. And he did.
He chose Siwon. Because for some reason, he just can’t share what he and Hyukjae have to the world… and yes, he’s a selfish bastard like that.
But Hyukjae didn’t seem to see it that way, as he caught a glimpse of the other’s smile, that one he’d do everything to protect, falter-a small twitch that none of the other members would notice. He felt guilty, and even more when a monkey and a horse had there moment and he just felt so helpless.
And there it was, a withdrawn Hyukjae again for the rest of the program. He thought it couldn’t get worse, that trying to sort this out with Hyukjae could wait, at least until all the hype’s over, and they’re not so busy with schedules and tired bodies. But then he saw it-the same face he saw about thrice in his life-that goodbye at the airport, another one in his room, and months ago when Hyukjae announced in one of their events that Kibum’s coming back soon.
It’s that expression that meant Hyukjae’s expressing a very calm attitude on the outside but running a zillion miles in his mind with so many things to think about-all related either to him, or their relationship.
And he felt helpless, he wanted things to stop right then and there so he could grab Hyukjae and shake him to oblivion, asking him what’s wrong. But he forced a smile, as Teukkie reiterated what Hyukjae said, both of them biting back something threatening to fall from their eyes for the wrong reasons.
“Super Junior-M is already back to the studios recording, and preparing a comeback.”
It has always been an unspoken issue between them-China. Neither of them wanted to admit their real take on the issue because none of them wanted to say something that might hurt the other’s feelings. So they kept it shut, tucked within the crevices of their ice-thin relationship until at that moment backstage after the party, Donghae chose to save them and stabilize on solid ground.
“Hyuk…” he motioned towards the other after closing the door. The other was on the other end of the room, trying to fix his bag.
“Hmm?”
“Everything’s gonna be okay… you know that, right?” He settled on the same table as Hyukjae’s bag, watching the other continue with the bag.
A smile. A nervous one. “What are you talking about? Of course, Hae.”
He can’t seem to put his point across.
“You know what I’m talking about, Hyukjae. It’s not going to be like that anymore.” He saw the other stop, breath deeply, then walk across the room to fix things that doesn’t need fixing.
“I don’t see the point in talking about this, Donghae. You’ve said that before, and look what happened. One thing I learned is that we never should say something we’re not really sure of. At least-“
“That was years ago, and yes, at that time, things didn’t happen as planned, but Hyuk, it’s not like I’m doing this just because I want that to happen again. And it’s not like everything’s my fault.”
Two bags were dropped on the floor, as Hyukjae turned towards him, face contorted with something similar to anger and pain.
“Oh, so now you’re blaming it on me? Donghae, you were in China. For a year. I may not have been able to answer every single call you made, but at least, when I answered, you don’t hear partying on the background or a bandmate’s hard and labored breathing on the background in the middle of the night!”
Tears found their way to Hyukjae’s eyes again. This wasn’t part of his plan, for these issues to resurface. He thought these were all resolved, as they patched things up after months of fighting, not talking, and fighting again after he returned from China.
“Hyuk, I’m not blaming you. Not at all. I just-“
“Oh, and the first person YOU call about your drama, in Taiwan where else, with that-that slut is Kibum! Ki-fucking-bum! And you expect me not to feel anything about that? And now that Kibum’s coming back, am I supposed to just stay in the background because the high and mighty KiHae is back? Because KiHae is your original pair, and I’ll remain tucked here, hidden within the confines of our so-called private lives?”
He was dumbfounded. He wasn’t expecting their issues-or more like, Hyukjae’s issues, to be this deep. The other was heaving now, crying, although trying to stop as much as he can.
“Hyukkie…”
“Don’t you fucking Hyukkie me, Donghae! You have no idea, no idea at all, how scared I am living everyday, waiting for the other shoe to drop. It’s like, you’re going to leave me once you realize that what we have isn’t for you, and I’m going to lose you to someone any time.”
His heart is breaking at how wrong Hyukjae’s thoughts are, and feeling helpless at the situation, all he could do at the moment is hug him with everything he has, hoping that every bit of his answer is conveyed through it.
“I’m not going anywhere, Hyukkie. And you’re not going to lose me to anyone.” He released himself from the hug and made the other face him, with snot, tears and all.
“Stop waiting, because the other shoe’s never going to drop,” he heard the other chuckle, “or however you mean by that. What happened before, when you called, it’s not going to happen again. You have to remember, this relationship is as important to me as it is to you. Hyuk, when all of this is over-that drama, the fan services, the shining lights, there’s nothing else left for me but this-what we have. Do you understand me, Hyukkie?”
A nod. A hiccup. A sniff.
“He’s coming back, you know.” For a second, he forgot who Hyukjae was talking about. He chuckled at the other’s very old issue, earning him a smack in the chest.
“Yah. Nothing’s funny.”
“Hyuk, you’re still not over that issue? Come on, you’re practically our group’s ace and you feel insecure about Kibummie?”
“Super Junior’s relationship with each other and our relationship are two different things, Hae. You know I don’t like you being all Kibummie with him.”
If there’s one thing Donghae would trade anything for, it would have to be Hyukjae being all jealous and possessive over him-specially against those people he never really should’ve bothered being jealous of.
“I love you. But not the same way as I love anyone else. So don’t think that way. I must say, this is the most dramatic I’ve seen you yet.”
“I’m sorry for the drama. I swear, this is just stress. But don’t push it, seriously.”
“Okay, I’m sorry. And seriously, we’re okay, right?”
A kiss.
“You really should stop watching all those late night dramas, Hyukkie.”
“Yeah, and you should really stop crying, Hae”
They laughed, and finally, Donghae saw the smile he’s always been living for. He whispered an I love you to the other’s hair as they hugged, and he felt the other smile wider, as impossible as that may sound at the moment. His heart tripped badly back then after China, and he’s going to do everything he can for things like that not to happen again. He may be the group’s cry baby for crying so easily, but his heart isn’t as fragile as people might think. He’s not as fragile as his Hyukjae’s heart… easily hurt but the hardest to recover. So he’ll protect it, and their relationship, and make it last. If Kangin-hyung and Teukkie-hyung lasted that long, why couldn’t he and Hyukjae?
He heard bustles outside, signaling that their moment’s over and should be caught, their alone time will be stretched to its thinnest, all thanks to the currently bitter leader.
But he wasn’t ready to let go yet, and neither is Hyukjae by the looks of it. As the door opened, revealing a sneaky looking Heechul, they exchanged looks, somehow conversing the way only hyungs-and-dongsaengs from their region do, and Heechul smiled, winking at him as the door closes.
“I love you, Hae. But I think we have to let go now. They’re coming back.”
And he hugged the other tighter as he heard Heechul shouting to the other members to proceed to the other room because he just thought of some clever game he’s going to post to twitvid. Trust his hyung to know everything even before anyone else does.
“Nah, we still have enough time. Want to do something else?”