[fic] Love Breaks Through
Here's my entry for the 2011 Advent Calendar. Since it got posted today, I can now post it here.
I really wanted to write a story where Duo is this kind of ladies' man, who is attracted to Heero though he might not think himself attracted to guys at all. I guess that's kind of what I wrote. IMO, it's too short, and not that great, but it is what it is, lol.
Title: Love Breaks Through
Pairing: 2x1
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: language, lemon, post-EW
“So, when do I pick you up tonight?”
Heero, staring at the automatic dispenser as it doled out his coffee, startled and whirled to find Duo standing at his side, a wide grin across his face.
“You don’t.”
Duo scoffed and reached for Heero’s coffee before him, making a show of bringing it to his lips before Heero, glaring, snatched it back.
“Nope, you promised you were coming to the holiday party, so you’re coming, bud.”
Heero turned out of the communal kitchen and headed toward his office. To his dismay, Duo followed him down the hall, apparently not content to take his silence for an answer.
“I don’t see why you need me to go with you at all, Duo.”
Two young female recruits approached from the down the hallway. Even though it was barely eight o’clock, Duo put on a full performance, offering them a smile and a wink.
“Hey Diana, Lindsey,” he said as they passed. Heero supposed there wasn’t a single woman in Preventers whose name he didn’t know.
“Hi Duo,” they said, a giggle barely hidden in their voices. When they were out of earshot, Duo leaned in close.
“Because, Yuy, those girls and about a hundred more are going to be at this thing, and I need a wingman. And no offense, but so do you, bud.”
They approached his door and Duo held it open for him, a practice that Heero hated. He let it show on his face as he walked in. Duo followed and closed the door behind them.
“The way you act, Heero, you’d think you didn’t want to get laid.”
The coffee in Heero’s hand shook a little. He sipped it and put it abruptly down on his desk, pulling his laptop out of its locked drawer and powering it up. He pointedly refused to look at Duo.
“I don’t get why it’s such a problem for you just to go to a party, man,” Duo continued, like he didn’t even notice. “It’s all going to be people you know. You know, Preventers. Besides, it’s Christmas Eve, you shouldn’t be sitting at home by yourself staring at a computer screen.”
Heero glanced at him and Duo laughed, his eyes crinkling at the corners, his even, white teeth on display. That expression could make even esteemed female agents blush. Heero would shoot himself before he blushed, but he still ended up staring. Eventually, he pulled his gaze back to his computer, where a prompt asked for his password. He had a moment’s trouble remembering it over the sound of Duo’s deep laughter.
“I don’t mind sitting at home,” he said finally, and it made Duo stop and let out a sigh.
“I know you don’t. But, you know...”
When he didn’t elaborate, Heero looked reluctantly up at him. He had that wistful look that made him look fifteen again, the one he used to wear when he was hounding Heero for his friendship back in the war. He had a knack for pulling it out when he suspected Heero was gearing up to really refuse him something. It was that look that had made him originally agree to go to the damn party, though he had been hoping Duo would forget, that he wouldn’t be forced to subject himself to what he knew a night out with Duo would entail. But Duo hadn’t forgotten, of course. Shit.
“I’m not going to drink,” he groused, and Duo smiled widely.
* * * *
Heero sipped at his fourth beer of the night and once again let it pass through his mind just how much of a mistake this had been. He resisted the urge to pull at the collar of his dress shirt a little. The banquet room, though massive, felt crowded and uncomfortably warm, although maybe that was just his proximity to the enormous christmas tree and its myriad gaudy lights. He had taken refuge over here sometime soon after deciding it was going to be a night to drink, to escape Duo, who seemed determined to find a girl for Heero to bring home. It was a laughable endeavor, but of course Duo didn’t know that.
It wasn’t all bad, he supposed, this party. Noin was here, and occasionally they would meet in the crowd and chat for a moment. He felt comfortable around her, maybe because she never seemed quite comfortable in settings like this, either.
“I hate wearing a dress,” she had said earlier.
“I hate wearing a suit,” he had agreed, and she had chuckled and clinked their bottles together, a show of solidarity.
Heero scanned the room now but couldn’t see her. He did, however, see Duo, standing by a table full of women. Someone was taking their picture, and Duo was leaning far over, practically in one of the girls’ laps, her hand low on his back. A flash of the camera, and they broke out of their poses, laughing like it was a joke between them, and Duo slipped his hand down the girl’s arm, resting it at her elbow, whispering something private in her ear. She laughed and laughed, that hand on his back slipping a little lower.
A familiar, dark emotion seeped through him, but he couldn’t bring himself to turn away, look somewhere else. He felt silly, embarrassed for himself, acting like one of those lovestruck girls. Duo was a friend, a true one, something very rare in his life, and it was wrong what Heero was doing in return, yearning for him in this selfish, consuming way, allowing his heart to take control of his mind, his body, to pump jealousy and need through him without his consent. He didn’t want it. It took the simple, comprehensible joy of friendship and made it feel... incomplete.
Heero grimaced at his train of thought. Christ, he hadn’t even had that much to drink. Maybe it was time to leave. He could slip through the crowd and never be noticed. He'd feel more like himself when he was home again. He put his half-drunk beer on the nearest table and began to make his way toward the door. The din of conversation surrounded him, no one paying him any mnd. This would be a breeze.
“Hey!”
He whirled, and there was Duo. Damn it. He had almost made it out.
He had his arm around the girl from the table, and now that he got a good look at her, Heero realized she was quite pretty. Well, of course she was. Duo was handsome and funny, he could have anyone he wanted. On his other side was another girl, slim, brown hair, who glanced at him and smiled, and then at Duo.
“Hey, Heero, this is Estelle,” Duo said, indicating the brown-haired girl. “She and Melissa work in Public Relations.” He squeezed the girl under his arm and she giggled.
“Hi, Heero,” Estelle said. “Duo's told me so much about you.”
Damn it. He had almost escaped without this. Heero nodded curtly at her by way of greeting, and noticed Duo's smile momentarily falter at the cold gesture. He would annoy him about it later, jokingly, because that's what he always did when Heero failed to take the girls Duo introduced him to home.
“Come on, man, let's go sit down.”
With a last, forlorn glance toward the door, Heero followed Duo back to the girls' table, wishing he hadn't left his beer at the far end of the room.
* * * *
“And Heero grabbed the gun in midair and dropped the guy!”
“Wow,” Estelle breathed, staring wide-eyed at Heero. Like he was on display at a museum. “That's amazing.”
“Yeah,” Duo said, grinning emphatically. “Not the first time he's saved my ass.”
“Weren't you scared?” Estelle pressed, fingers touching Heero's arm. Heero turned his glare from where Duo had his hand on Melissa's shoulder to the tipsy girl at his side.
“No.”
“Yeah, right,” Duo cut in quickly, with a sharp look his way. “He's just trying to impress you.”
“What about you, Duo?” Melissa said, her hand sliding a little further up his thigh. “I'm sure you've done the same for Heero.”
He laughed. “Oh yeah, of course. I busted this guy out of an Alliance prison, you know!”
“Oh my God, really?”
“No shit. I had to blow a hole in the wall and toss us both out. This guy took a fall from a hundred feet and survived with just a broken leg!”
Heero felt a lump rise in his throat. It made him sick to hear Duo use this story to get a girl in bed. Suddenly, he had had enough.
“Excuse me,” he said, rising abruptly from the table.
“Hey, Heero!” Duo said, but he didn't want to hear Duo share any more of their history together. Not like that, not with those girls. He cut through the crowd easily in his determination to get to the door.
It was icily cold and windy outside, and Heero remembered belatedly that Duo had driven him to the party. It would be a long walk home, but even that felt like a comfort compared to spending another moment inside. It had been such a mistake to come at all. Heero went to the corner and waited for the traffic light to turn so he could cross, resisting the urge to sprint across the street in spite of the rushing cars.
“Heero!” He heard behind him. Duo hurried over to him, shivering, looking pissed.
“What the hell, man?” he said when he was close. “What was that for?”
“I'm going home,” Heero said. The pedestrian light flashed red to white overhead. Heero turned to cross the street and Duo followed.
“Why? That girl was into you!”
“I'm not interested.”
“So you don't even tell me? You just leave?”
Heero was suddenly irate. He whirled around to Duo, growling at him over the wind.
“Why does it matter? Did I screw up your sure thing?”
“What the hell, are you jealous of me? Are you crazy?” Duo threw his hands into the air. “I don't get you at all! You could have any girl you wanted, if you didn't treat them like that!”
“I don't want them,” he spat.
Hot, wrenching anger burned through him. Why was Duo out here in the cold, arguing with him about this? Why did he try so hard to push Heero to be someone he wasn't? Someone like himself, content to go home with a different girl every night, each instantly forgotten for the next one?
He could never be like that. He would never be content with anyone besides Duo.
“I'm just trying to help you, Heero! I'm your friend, aren't I?”
Heero's heart twisted furiously in his chest.
“You can't give me what I want.”
“What does that mean?” Duo shot back, and the words came hissing out of him before he could stop himself.
“I want what that girl whose name you won't even remember tomorrow gets to have.”
He watched the comprehension flood Duo's face, his eyes going wide. He opened his mouth like he wanted to say something, but nothing came out. Relief and shame washed through Heero in a sick wave. Now Duo finally knew.
“I'm going home,” he said, and this time, Duo had nothing to say in response. He turned down the icy street, and Duo didn't follow.
By the time he got back to his apartment, the anger had drained out of him, replaced by caustic embarrassment. He should have controlled himself. What had he done? He may very well have fucked up his friendship with Duo for good, out of stupid, pathetic jealousy. He was ashamed of himself.
The buzzer by the door rang, and Heero went to it, absently pressing the intercom button.
“Heero? It's me.” Duo.
“What do you want?”
“Can you let me up? It's fucking freezing out here.”
Heero's finger hovered over the button for a moment. Could he really endure further humiliation? Well, part of him supposed he deserved it. He pressed down and heard the buzz of the door unlocking through the intercom before it went dead. In a few minutes, there was a knock on the door, and after an instant of hesitation, he sighed and opened it. Duo stood on the other side, hands in his pockets, looking up through his bangs at Heero with a strange, subdued expression.
“Hey.”
“What is it?”
“I, uh, wanted to apologize. I just didn't realize... that you... you know.” He gestured vaguely. “That it was... like that. If I had known, I wouldn't have...” He shrugged. “I feel like an asshole.”
Heero grunted, his face feeling hot.
“I didn't mean to make you walk home in the cold like that, either. I was just kind of shocked. Surprised, I mean. Sorry.”
“Don't worry about it,” Heero said quickly. He wanted this conversation over, this night over. He wanted it to never have happened at all. “Good night.”
He moved to close the door and Duo stepped halfway into it, blocking the way.
“Wait, that's it?”
“Duo, it's late.”
“So what? Don't you think we should talk about this?”
Heero glared. “No.”
“Well, I do. I want to talk about it.”
“Go home, Duo.”
“Did you really mean it? What you said before.”
“Duo...” He could feel the anger beginning to swell again. This was just cruel.
Duo wrapped his hand around the door, staring hard at Heero.
“You want what those girls get to have. Isn't that what you said?”
“Duo, that's enough--”
“I didn't go home with that girl, Heero. I came here instead. I'm here now.”
He pushed the door open, sliding in through the small space Heero allowed before slamming it shut. He was suddenly very close. Heero took an automatic step back and found himself against the door. His heart thundered in his chest.
“Duo,” he stammered, embarrassed by the waver in his voice. “Cut it out...”
“Isn't this what you want?” Duo said, voice a low, throaty growl. His hands came up on either side of Heero's face. Heero suddenly had a vision of Duo with a girl, just like this, and with the last of his willpower shoved him hard away.
“This isn't what you want,” he said bitterly. “Stop fucking with me.”
Something flashed in Duo's eyes and he slammed Heero up against the door, grabbing his hand forcefully and pressing it to where he could feel Duo's erection burning behind the fabric of his pants.
“You don't think I'm serious?” he growled in Heero's ear, grinding into his hand. “Does this feel like I'm joking to you?”
Heero protested with the frayed remains of his resolve. “But you've never--”
“--Maybe not, but it sounds pretty fucking good right now,” Duo replied, and brought his mouth down to cover Heero's, kissing him hard and heavy. He ran his tongue across Heero's lips, slid it forcefully into his mouth, hot and wet, teeth grazing over Heero's bottom lip. He ran his hands up Heero's chest, unbuttoning his suit coat as he went, then his shirt, taking fistfuls of his clothing for leverage.
Heero found himself with his hands clenched against the door, helpless under Duo's kiss, nerves alive with desire, skin burning with Duo's touch. Duo's hands wandered over him, groping him through his pants, slipping a leg between Heero's to grind against his erection as he plundered his mouth, devilishly assured of himself, coaxing a moan from Heero's throat that surprised even himself. Duo broke away, pressing his lips against Heero's ear, his voice hoarse and raw.
“Fuck, I want you so bad,” he growled. “Christ, Heero, shit.”
Heero sucked in a breath and weakly shook his head.
“N-not here.”
Duo laughed darkly against his jaw line, pressing his mouth to skin.
“Gotcha.”
He pulled them away from the doorway and through the apartment to Heero's bedroom, maneuvering deftly past pieces of furniture along the way. He knew where everything in Heero's apartment was, didn't he? No one else was this familiar with Heero's private life. Heero would never allow anyone else in this close.
Duo left the bedroom dark and wrapped his arms around Heero's waist in the doorway, kissing him forcefully, then pushed him onto the bed and climbed over him, his fingers reaching for his belt, pulling it out and throwing it across the room before returning for the zipper. He bent down and pressed his mouth to the flat skin beneath Heero's navel as he loosened his pants and snaked fingers inside, shimmying them down his legs.
Heero pressed the heels of his palms against his eyes, throat tight, heart smashing against his ribs, and let Duo pull his underwear down, kissing a line down his abdomen to where his cock throbbed, burning hot and dripping, and took it into his mouth without hesitation. He slid his lips down the shaft, taking the length easily, chuckling around his cock when Heero groaned in abandon to the sensation.
Rough fingertips glided over his balls, his thighs, as Duo worked him with his mouth, until Heero was bucking desperately under him, his legs trembling, moments from release. He pulled away, climbing back over him, pulling Heero's hands gently away from his face, kissing him with surprising softness.
They pulled away from each other to undress, Duo pulling a condom wordlessly out of his pocket, the sheepish grin on his face the only indication between them at how far from expected the night had turned out. He fished some lotion out of Heero's bedside table and prepared himself, his fingers. He knelt back down over Heero and coaxed his tongue between his lips as he worked him gently open. Heero hooked his arms under Duo's shoulders, hitching up his legs. He was too far gone to be embarrassed by his position now, desperate for Duo's touch, for everything he was willing to give him. Duo broke the kiss to stare down at him, blue eyes a shadowed purple in the dark.
“Ready?” he whispered. Heero nodded. “Okay.”
He held Heero's gaze as he slowly pushed himself in, eyes going wide, running a thumb absently over Heero's lips.
“Fuck...” he whispered, going ever deeper. “Heero...”
Heero sucked in a breath, overwhelmed by the sensation of Duo filling him, opening him wide. Nothing had ever felt like this before. He wrapped his legs tightly around Duo's hips to keep them from shaking, but the earth shook instead, the universe trembled. He arched against the mattress as Duo slid fully in, lowering his head into the crook of Heero's collarbone.
Slowly, he began to move, shallowly jerking his hips in and out, acclimating himself. He propped himself up on his elbows and pressed his mouth to Heero's, hot and wet, his thrusts beginning to come harder, faster.
“Heero... Heero...” Duo whispered against his lips, again and again.
He began to pull out hard and slam back into him, their bodies slick with sweat, sliding together with easy friction. Pleasure coursed through him, building in intensity, like a tidal wave gaining speed, surging toward its final crash, making him rock desperately back into Duo's thrusts, begging wordlessly for more contact, and Duo gave it to him, fucking him hard into the mattress, closing his hand around Heero's cock and palming it roughly.
Heero's climax took both of them by surprise, careening out of him with enough force to take his breath away, making Duo rear back with a choked curse and gritted teeth as Heero's muscles contracted around him.
“Heero, fuck, I'm gonna--” he growled, and then he was shuddering against him, lost to sensation. He collapsed over him, breathless, pressing a messy kiss to his shoulder.
Heero came back to himself with his arms around Duo, staring up at the ceiling, his eyes burning, strangely wet. His voice shook when he spoke.
“Duo? Are you--”
“I don't know,” Duo whispered. “I don't know. Just... hold me, okay?”
So he did. Eventually, Duo's breathing evened, and Heero felt his eyes grow heavy, sleep overtaking them both.
* * * *
Sunlight woke him, who knew how many hours later. He stretched, wondering why he felt so tired, like he had worked out hard the night before. Then, it came back to him, and his eyes shot open and he sat up in the bed. Duo was lying with his arm crooked under his head, obviously awake for quite some time.
“Hey,” he said, grinning lopsidedly at Heero.
“Duo...” His heart hammered in his chest. “You're still here.”
“Yeah, I am,” Duo said, shifting into a sitting position. “Is that a bad thing?”
Heero shook his head.
“Sorry. I'm just... surprised.”
“Yeah,” Duo said, sliding his hand over Heero's on the mattress, his gaze flickering upwards like he wasn't sure how the gesture would be received. “Me too.”
Slowly, he leaned over, placing a soft kiss on Heero's mouth.
“But that's okay, isn't it?” he said, with that wide, easy smile. God, that smile. Would a day ever come that he could resist it?
For the first time, Heero hoped it wouldn't.
“Yes, I think it is,” Heero replied, and pulled Duo down to the bed.
The End
I really wanted to write a story where Duo is this kind of ladies' man, who is attracted to Heero though he might not think himself attracted to guys at all. I guess that's kind of what I wrote. IMO, it's too short, and not that great, but it is what it is, lol.
Title: Love Breaks Through
Pairing: 2x1
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: language, lemon, post-EW
“So, when do I pick you up tonight?”
Heero, staring at the automatic dispenser as it doled out his coffee, startled and whirled to find Duo standing at his side, a wide grin across his face.
“You don’t.”
Duo scoffed and reached for Heero’s coffee before him, making a show of bringing it to his lips before Heero, glaring, snatched it back.
“Nope, you promised you were coming to the holiday party, so you’re coming, bud.”
Heero turned out of the communal kitchen and headed toward his office. To his dismay, Duo followed him down the hall, apparently not content to take his silence for an answer.
“I don’t see why you need me to go with you at all, Duo.”
Two young female recruits approached from the down the hallway. Even though it was barely eight o’clock, Duo put on a full performance, offering them a smile and a wink.
“Hey Diana, Lindsey,” he said as they passed. Heero supposed there wasn’t a single woman in Preventers whose name he didn’t know.
“Hi Duo,” they said, a giggle barely hidden in their voices. When they were out of earshot, Duo leaned in close.
“Because, Yuy, those girls and about a hundred more are going to be at this thing, and I need a wingman. And no offense, but so do you, bud.”
They approached his door and Duo held it open for him, a practice that Heero hated. He let it show on his face as he walked in. Duo followed and closed the door behind them.
“The way you act, Heero, you’d think you didn’t want to get laid.”
The coffee in Heero’s hand shook a little. He sipped it and put it abruptly down on his desk, pulling his laptop out of its locked drawer and powering it up. He pointedly refused to look at Duo.
“I don’t get why it’s such a problem for you just to go to a party, man,” Duo continued, like he didn’t even notice. “It’s all going to be people you know. You know, Preventers. Besides, it’s Christmas Eve, you shouldn’t be sitting at home by yourself staring at a computer screen.”
Heero glanced at him and Duo laughed, his eyes crinkling at the corners, his even, white teeth on display. That expression could make even esteemed female agents blush. Heero would shoot himself before he blushed, but he still ended up staring. Eventually, he pulled his gaze back to his computer, where a prompt asked for his password. He had a moment’s trouble remembering it over the sound of Duo’s deep laughter.
“I don’t mind sitting at home,” he said finally, and it made Duo stop and let out a sigh.
“I know you don’t. But, you know...”
When he didn’t elaborate, Heero looked reluctantly up at him. He had that wistful look that made him look fifteen again, the one he used to wear when he was hounding Heero for his friendship back in the war. He had a knack for pulling it out when he suspected Heero was gearing up to really refuse him something. It was that look that had made him originally agree to go to the damn party, though he had been hoping Duo would forget, that he wouldn’t be forced to subject himself to what he knew a night out with Duo would entail. But Duo hadn’t forgotten, of course. Shit.
“I’m not going to drink,” he groused, and Duo smiled widely.
* * * *
Heero sipped at his fourth beer of the night and once again let it pass through his mind just how much of a mistake this had been. He resisted the urge to pull at the collar of his dress shirt a little. The banquet room, though massive, felt crowded and uncomfortably warm, although maybe that was just his proximity to the enormous christmas tree and its myriad gaudy lights. He had taken refuge over here sometime soon after deciding it was going to be a night to drink, to escape Duo, who seemed determined to find a girl for Heero to bring home. It was a laughable endeavor, but of course Duo didn’t know that.
It wasn’t all bad, he supposed, this party. Noin was here, and occasionally they would meet in the crowd and chat for a moment. He felt comfortable around her, maybe because she never seemed quite comfortable in settings like this, either.
“I hate wearing a dress,” she had said earlier.
“I hate wearing a suit,” he had agreed, and she had chuckled and clinked their bottles together, a show of solidarity.
Heero scanned the room now but couldn’t see her. He did, however, see Duo, standing by a table full of women. Someone was taking their picture, and Duo was leaning far over, practically in one of the girls’ laps, her hand low on his back. A flash of the camera, and they broke out of their poses, laughing like it was a joke between them, and Duo slipped his hand down the girl’s arm, resting it at her elbow, whispering something private in her ear. She laughed and laughed, that hand on his back slipping a little lower.
A familiar, dark emotion seeped through him, but he couldn’t bring himself to turn away, look somewhere else. He felt silly, embarrassed for himself, acting like one of those lovestruck girls. Duo was a friend, a true one, something very rare in his life, and it was wrong what Heero was doing in return, yearning for him in this selfish, consuming way, allowing his heart to take control of his mind, his body, to pump jealousy and need through him without his consent. He didn’t want it. It took the simple, comprehensible joy of friendship and made it feel... incomplete.
Heero grimaced at his train of thought. Christ, he hadn’t even had that much to drink. Maybe it was time to leave. He could slip through the crowd and never be noticed. He'd feel more like himself when he was home again. He put his half-drunk beer on the nearest table and began to make his way toward the door. The din of conversation surrounded him, no one paying him any mnd. This would be a breeze.
“Hey!”
He whirled, and there was Duo. Damn it. He had almost made it out.
He had his arm around the girl from the table, and now that he got a good look at her, Heero realized she was quite pretty. Well, of course she was. Duo was handsome and funny, he could have anyone he wanted. On his other side was another girl, slim, brown hair, who glanced at him and smiled, and then at Duo.
“Hey, Heero, this is Estelle,” Duo said, indicating the brown-haired girl. “She and Melissa work in Public Relations.” He squeezed the girl under his arm and she giggled.
“Hi, Heero,” Estelle said. “Duo's told me so much about you.”
Damn it. He had almost escaped without this. Heero nodded curtly at her by way of greeting, and noticed Duo's smile momentarily falter at the cold gesture. He would annoy him about it later, jokingly, because that's what he always did when Heero failed to take the girls Duo introduced him to home.
“Come on, man, let's go sit down.”
With a last, forlorn glance toward the door, Heero followed Duo back to the girls' table, wishing he hadn't left his beer at the far end of the room.
* * * *
“And Heero grabbed the gun in midair and dropped the guy!”
“Wow,” Estelle breathed, staring wide-eyed at Heero. Like he was on display at a museum. “That's amazing.”
“Yeah,” Duo said, grinning emphatically. “Not the first time he's saved my ass.”
“Weren't you scared?” Estelle pressed, fingers touching Heero's arm. Heero turned his glare from where Duo had his hand on Melissa's shoulder to the tipsy girl at his side.
“No.”
“Yeah, right,” Duo cut in quickly, with a sharp look his way. “He's just trying to impress you.”
“What about you, Duo?” Melissa said, her hand sliding a little further up his thigh. “I'm sure you've done the same for Heero.”
He laughed. “Oh yeah, of course. I busted this guy out of an Alliance prison, you know!”
“Oh my God, really?”
“No shit. I had to blow a hole in the wall and toss us both out. This guy took a fall from a hundred feet and survived with just a broken leg!”
Heero felt a lump rise in his throat. It made him sick to hear Duo use this story to get a girl in bed. Suddenly, he had had enough.
“Excuse me,” he said, rising abruptly from the table.
“Hey, Heero!” Duo said, but he didn't want to hear Duo share any more of their history together. Not like that, not with those girls. He cut through the crowd easily in his determination to get to the door.
It was icily cold and windy outside, and Heero remembered belatedly that Duo had driven him to the party. It would be a long walk home, but even that felt like a comfort compared to spending another moment inside. It had been such a mistake to come at all. Heero went to the corner and waited for the traffic light to turn so he could cross, resisting the urge to sprint across the street in spite of the rushing cars.
“Heero!” He heard behind him. Duo hurried over to him, shivering, looking pissed.
“What the hell, man?” he said when he was close. “What was that for?”
“I'm going home,” Heero said. The pedestrian light flashed red to white overhead. Heero turned to cross the street and Duo followed.
“Why? That girl was into you!”
“I'm not interested.”
“So you don't even tell me? You just leave?”
Heero was suddenly irate. He whirled around to Duo, growling at him over the wind.
“Why does it matter? Did I screw up your sure thing?”
“What the hell, are you jealous of me? Are you crazy?” Duo threw his hands into the air. “I don't get you at all! You could have any girl you wanted, if you didn't treat them like that!”
“I don't want them,” he spat.
Hot, wrenching anger burned through him. Why was Duo out here in the cold, arguing with him about this? Why did he try so hard to push Heero to be someone he wasn't? Someone like himself, content to go home with a different girl every night, each instantly forgotten for the next one?
He could never be like that. He would never be content with anyone besides Duo.
“I'm just trying to help you, Heero! I'm your friend, aren't I?”
Heero's heart twisted furiously in his chest.
“You can't give me what I want.”
“What does that mean?” Duo shot back, and the words came hissing out of him before he could stop himself.
“I want what that girl whose name you won't even remember tomorrow gets to have.”
He watched the comprehension flood Duo's face, his eyes going wide. He opened his mouth like he wanted to say something, but nothing came out. Relief and shame washed through Heero in a sick wave. Now Duo finally knew.
“I'm going home,” he said, and this time, Duo had nothing to say in response. He turned down the icy street, and Duo didn't follow.
By the time he got back to his apartment, the anger had drained out of him, replaced by caustic embarrassment. He should have controlled himself. What had he done? He may very well have fucked up his friendship with Duo for good, out of stupid, pathetic jealousy. He was ashamed of himself.
The buzzer by the door rang, and Heero went to it, absently pressing the intercom button.
“Heero? It's me.” Duo.
“What do you want?”
“Can you let me up? It's fucking freezing out here.”
Heero's finger hovered over the button for a moment. Could he really endure further humiliation? Well, part of him supposed he deserved it. He pressed down and heard the buzz of the door unlocking through the intercom before it went dead. In a few minutes, there was a knock on the door, and after an instant of hesitation, he sighed and opened it. Duo stood on the other side, hands in his pockets, looking up through his bangs at Heero with a strange, subdued expression.
“Hey.”
“What is it?”
“I, uh, wanted to apologize. I just didn't realize... that you... you know.” He gestured vaguely. “That it was... like that. If I had known, I wouldn't have...” He shrugged. “I feel like an asshole.”
Heero grunted, his face feeling hot.
“I didn't mean to make you walk home in the cold like that, either. I was just kind of shocked. Surprised, I mean. Sorry.”
“Don't worry about it,” Heero said quickly. He wanted this conversation over, this night over. He wanted it to never have happened at all. “Good night.”
He moved to close the door and Duo stepped halfway into it, blocking the way.
“Wait, that's it?”
“Duo, it's late.”
“So what? Don't you think we should talk about this?”
Heero glared. “No.”
“Well, I do. I want to talk about it.”
“Go home, Duo.”
“Did you really mean it? What you said before.”
“Duo...” He could feel the anger beginning to swell again. This was just cruel.
Duo wrapped his hand around the door, staring hard at Heero.
“You want what those girls get to have. Isn't that what you said?”
“Duo, that's enough--”
“I didn't go home with that girl, Heero. I came here instead. I'm here now.”
He pushed the door open, sliding in through the small space Heero allowed before slamming it shut. He was suddenly very close. Heero took an automatic step back and found himself against the door. His heart thundered in his chest.
“Duo,” he stammered, embarrassed by the waver in his voice. “Cut it out...”
“Isn't this what you want?” Duo said, voice a low, throaty growl. His hands came up on either side of Heero's face. Heero suddenly had a vision of Duo with a girl, just like this, and with the last of his willpower shoved him hard away.
“This isn't what you want,” he said bitterly. “Stop fucking with me.”
Something flashed in Duo's eyes and he slammed Heero up against the door, grabbing his hand forcefully and pressing it to where he could feel Duo's erection burning behind the fabric of his pants.
“You don't think I'm serious?” he growled in Heero's ear, grinding into his hand. “Does this feel like I'm joking to you?”
Heero protested with the frayed remains of his resolve. “But you've never--”
“--Maybe not, but it sounds pretty fucking good right now,” Duo replied, and brought his mouth down to cover Heero's, kissing him hard and heavy. He ran his tongue across Heero's lips, slid it forcefully into his mouth, hot and wet, teeth grazing over Heero's bottom lip. He ran his hands up Heero's chest, unbuttoning his suit coat as he went, then his shirt, taking fistfuls of his clothing for leverage.
Heero found himself with his hands clenched against the door, helpless under Duo's kiss, nerves alive with desire, skin burning with Duo's touch. Duo's hands wandered over him, groping him through his pants, slipping a leg between Heero's to grind against his erection as he plundered his mouth, devilishly assured of himself, coaxing a moan from Heero's throat that surprised even himself. Duo broke away, pressing his lips against Heero's ear, his voice hoarse and raw.
“Fuck, I want you so bad,” he growled. “Christ, Heero, shit.”
Heero sucked in a breath and weakly shook his head.
“N-not here.”
Duo laughed darkly against his jaw line, pressing his mouth to skin.
“Gotcha.”
He pulled them away from the doorway and through the apartment to Heero's bedroom, maneuvering deftly past pieces of furniture along the way. He knew where everything in Heero's apartment was, didn't he? No one else was this familiar with Heero's private life. Heero would never allow anyone else in this close.
Duo left the bedroom dark and wrapped his arms around Heero's waist in the doorway, kissing him forcefully, then pushed him onto the bed and climbed over him, his fingers reaching for his belt, pulling it out and throwing it across the room before returning for the zipper. He bent down and pressed his mouth to the flat skin beneath Heero's navel as he loosened his pants and snaked fingers inside, shimmying them down his legs.
Heero pressed the heels of his palms against his eyes, throat tight, heart smashing against his ribs, and let Duo pull his underwear down, kissing a line down his abdomen to where his cock throbbed, burning hot and dripping, and took it into his mouth without hesitation. He slid his lips down the shaft, taking the length easily, chuckling around his cock when Heero groaned in abandon to the sensation.
Rough fingertips glided over his balls, his thighs, as Duo worked him with his mouth, until Heero was bucking desperately under him, his legs trembling, moments from release. He pulled away, climbing back over him, pulling Heero's hands gently away from his face, kissing him with surprising softness.
They pulled away from each other to undress, Duo pulling a condom wordlessly out of his pocket, the sheepish grin on his face the only indication between them at how far from expected the night had turned out. He fished some lotion out of Heero's bedside table and prepared himself, his fingers. He knelt back down over Heero and coaxed his tongue between his lips as he worked him gently open. Heero hooked his arms under Duo's shoulders, hitching up his legs. He was too far gone to be embarrassed by his position now, desperate for Duo's touch, for everything he was willing to give him. Duo broke the kiss to stare down at him, blue eyes a shadowed purple in the dark.
“Ready?” he whispered. Heero nodded. “Okay.”
He held Heero's gaze as he slowly pushed himself in, eyes going wide, running a thumb absently over Heero's lips.
“Fuck...” he whispered, going ever deeper. “Heero...”
Heero sucked in a breath, overwhelmed by the sensation of Duo filling him, opening him wide. Nothing had ever felt like this before. He wrapped his legs tightly around Duo's hips to keep them from shaking, but the earth shook instead, the universe trembled. He arched against the mattress as Duo slid fully in, lowering his head into the crook of Heero's collarbone.
Slowly, he began to move, shallowly jerking his hips in and out, acclimating himself. He propped himself up on his elbows and pressed his mouth to Heero's, hot and wet, his thrusts beginning to come harder, faster.
“Heero... Heero...” Duo whispered against his lips, again and again.
He began to pull out hard and slam back into him, their bodies slick with sweat, sliding together with easy friction. Pleasure coursed through him, building in intensity, like a tidal wave gaining speed, surging toward its final crash, making him rock desperately back into Duo's thrusts, begging wordlessly for more contact, and Duo gave it to him, fucking him hard into the mattress, closing his hand around Heero's cock and palming it roughly.
Heero's climax took both of them by surprise, careening out of him with enough force to take his breath away, making Duo rear back with a choked curse and gritted teeth as Heero's muscles contracted around him.
“Heero, fuck, I'm gonna--” he growled, and then he was shuddering against him, lost to sensation. He collapsed over him, breathless, pressing a messy kiss to his shoulder.
Heero came back to himself with his arms around Duo, staring up at the ceiling, his eyes burning, strangely wet. His voice shook when he spoke.
“Duo? Are you--”
“I don't know,” Duo whispered. “I don't know. Just... hold me, okay?”
So he did. Eventually, Duo's breathing evened, and Heero felt his eyes grow heavy, sleep overtaking them both.
* * * *
Sunlight woke him, who knew how many hours later. He stretched, wondering why he felt so tired, like he had worked out hard the night before. Then, it came back to him, and his eyes shot open and he sat up in the bed. Duo was lying with his arm crooked under his head, obviously awake for quite some time.
“Hey,” he said, grinning lopsidedly at Heero.
“Duo...” His heart hammered in his chest. “You're still here.”
“Yeah, I am,” Duo said, shifting into a sitting position. “Is that a bad thing?”
Heero shook his head.
“Sorry. I'm just... surprised.”
“Yeah,” Duo said, sliding his hand over Heero's on the mattress, his gaze flickering upwards like he wasn't sure how the gesture would be received. “Me too.”
Slowly, he leaned over, placing a soft kiss on Heero's mouth.
“But that's okay, isn't it?” he said, with that wide, easy smile. God, that smile. Would a day ever come that he could resist it?
For the first time, Heero hoped it wouldn't.
“Yes, I think it is,” Heero replied, and pulled Duo down to the bed.
The End