Crying Without Tears
CRYING WITHOUT TEARS
by Sayo
Disclaimer: The Usual.
Beta: The unusually foxy DaystarsMom
Pairing: YuuRam
“Like it?” Yuuri asked with a touch of smugness as he showed Wolfram the new music room and artist’s studio.
Wolfram couldn’t believe his eyes.
He had always thought of his old bedroom as rather large, but now it looked cozy. Musical instruments of many kinds were displayed on mounts, with space where he could practice.
Gunter would love how this was organized, the young princeling thought, but he would never see it. Yuuri had sealed this room in so that only his and Wolfram’s power signatures were allowed inside - a way to keep privacy and security in check at the same time.
The walls were painted a burgundy shade and the trim was darkened oak. Wolfram touched the wall for a moment and then raised a dark gold brow at the king. The blond preened a little when Yuuri squirmed a bit under his scrutiny.
“Burgundy?” Wolfram asked in a purring voice.
Yuuri tugged at his collar. “Er, I - uh…” the Japanese boy stammered.
Wolfram smiled at his new husband brightly, and shamelessly batted his long, dark lashes at him. Feeling just a bit more coy, Wolfram drew close and casually ran his hand on Yuuri’s chest, briefly enjoying the sensation of smooth fabric over what he knew was smoother skin. Yum, Wolfram purred to himself, letting the vibrations from his throat jar Yuuri even more. And then Wolfram pulled gently away. “I like it, don’t worry,” the blond said.
He then showed Yuuri his back, and then his behind, as Wolfram bent over to flick imaginary dust off a viola and then blew upon it. Wolfram bit his lip to hide his smile upon hearing Yuuri gulp. And when Yuuri breathed a sigh of relief -- it was all Wolfram could do to keep from laughing.
"W-well uh... you have blond hair and your skin's very light, so uh... I thought the color would make you stand out -- er, more than usual, ya know?" Yuuri attempted to explain. His eyes went one way and then the other, setting his sights on everywhere but the all-too-happy Wolfram.
The Prince Consort peered at the sovereign from the corner of his catlike, lake-green eyes. “You’ve been… fantasizing.” The Nordic boy said coquettishly.
A drop of sweat rolled from Yuuri’s temple and into the collar of his shirt. Wolfram licked his lips as he followed its trail with his mind… straight into the gutter.
Yuuri crossed his arms over his chest. “Well, you married me. So don’t mind if I do,” his tone that of mock hurt.
“Touché, fiancé.” Wolfram replied, grinning seductively.
“That’s husband, Prince Wolfram. And unless you want me to claim you again right on this brand-new, very clean carpet -“
Wolfram clucked his tongue, smiled devilishly and waved a finger at his king. “Nuh-uh-uh!” he said in a sing-song manner. “Music now, play later.”
Yuuri smirked. “Okay. Focus,” the boy king pretended to brace himself although, Wolfram thought, Yuuri did look just the least bit ruffled from being shot down. Wolfram shrugged. Where was the fun in being too easy?
The musical instruments had also been wedding gifts, Wolfram realized as he slowly and carefully inspected each of them. Every instrument was obviously expensive and well-crafted, and Wolfram knew from sight they were all in perfect shape and tuning.
Knowing that Wolfram would spend a lot of time here, Yuuri had put small containers of Wolfram's favorite apple-based potpourri in every corner. It was a small detail, but a thoughtful one... or perhaps Yuuri hoped to chase away the scent of bearbee paint, should Wolfram ever think of using the easel that stood near the big bay windows.
Wolfram turned to Yuuri and said “I love it.”
Yuuri blushed and then, after he’d regained himself, he grinned. “You’re welcome.”
The blond smiled back and picked up a guitar and soon he was playing Pachelbel’s Canon, a piece which he had learned by ear from his many visits to Earth. Wolfram knew Yuuri was pleased that he’d picked up Depapepe’s modern version of the classic. The blond couldn’t imagine what Yuuri would think had Wolfram learned Yngwie Malmsteen’s take on it first, which to Wolfram sounded like “modern misery”. How disconcerting, all puns be pardoned.
Yuuri himself walked over to the baby grand piano and with one hand, he followed Wolfram’s plucked notes a couple steps higher to harmonize the sounds from both instruments. Being a baseball boy, Yuuri didn’t get very skillful at the piano, even though Miko had hired a piano teacher to come to the Shibuya home on weekends when Yuuri was small. So just a little, very subtly, Wolfram slowed down so Yuuri could play in time with him. Easy does it, always to Yuuri’s beat.
The boy king struck off-key notes time and again, but Wolf didn’t mind. Nope, there was no way on Earth or anywhere Yuuri could have become a virtuoso, but he could play passably without having to read notes. And as Wolfram expected, Yuuri’s other hand joined its partner on the keyboard and beautiful music filled the air.
When the two finished playing the simple but pretty piece, Yuuri closed the piano and then gestured for Wolfram to sit beside him.
Wolfram put the guitar in the case and leaned it back against the stand, securing the neck at the perch. The Prince Consort then took his seat beside the Monarch, who took Wolfram’s hand in his own. “We already have a lot of golden punch bowls so I thought I’d get word out that I wanted to build a music room for you as a wedding present.” Yuuri began. “I’d wanted to do just an art studio at first but since you had become so good at the violin, I thought better of it and built a place where you could practice and yet…” Yuuri trailed off.
Wolfram cocked his head to one side, curious. “And yet what, Yuuri?”
Yuuri sighed. “And yet you never picked up the violin again after I saw you that night, playing your solo to the sea when we were visiting Karbelnikov. Now it’s always the guitar or some other instrument but never the violin, and I was wondering why.”
Wolfram blushed and unconsciously gripped Yuuri’s hand tighter. Neither boy spoke a word for a few moments and then Wolfram chose to break the silence. He leaned his face towards Yuuri’s and then spoke softly. “That night when you found me at the beach...”
The boy king furrowed his brows at that. “Yes..?”
The Prince Consort sighed and looked away. “The violin is the closest to the voice in sound. When I was small, Mother had me learn the violin in hopes that it would help me channel my anger. It did nothing for my temper, but the violin helped me cry without tears.”
“Oh Wolf…”
Wolfram lowered his eyes before setting them once and for all on the violin that lay innocently in its case on top of the piano before which he and his husband sat.
“Yuuri, that night when you saw me… I was saying my goodbyes. To you, to my family, to everyone.”
“Wolf…”
The angelic-looking demon put his hand on the wooden cover of the piano, and felt the smooth coolness of the metal hinge that allowed it to be folded away after being raised. “It was the tenth year of our engagement and I saw no end in sight. I thought that if I gave myself over to the waves I would be able to free you and at the same time -“
Yuuri looked about ready to smash the baby grand in two. “Stop it! I don’t want to hear any more!” the sovereign said as he covered his ears.
But Wolfram was stronger than him and managed to lower one of Yuuri’s hands and then, afterwards, it was the blond who grasped Yuuri’s larger, baseball-hardened hand in his own tiny sword-calloused ones. “Listen.” Wolfram said.
Yuuri reluctantly agreed and then Wolfram continued. “I haven't touched the violin since tjat night because the next morning you told me you loved me. I have no need for it anymore."
Yuuri opened one eye, then the other, and looked upon his Prince curiously, the ruler's expression uncertain. “You’re sure? I want to make you happy but I... I don’t know if I can.”
Wolfram shook his head and smiled. “You do. I knew even then that if you loved me, I won’t ever be sad again.”
Yuuri looked into Wolfram’s eyes desperately. “And if I mess up, you’ll tell me? I don’t ever want to lose you, Wolf. Gods…" Yuuri groaned. "Thinking I had been so close, so close to losing you… I can’t imagine what life would be like without you.”
Wolfram smiled and shook his head again. “You didn’t lose me. That is that. And believe me, Yuuri: You’re the one who’ll never be free of me. I’ll find you in every lifetime and force you to love me.”
At that Yuuri pulled the blond into his arms, closed his own dark eyes, and filled his being with the scent of Wolfram. Of Mine. Of Always. “Next time, you won’t have to do that. I’ll come and find you. I’ll stalk you from babyhood if I have to,”
Wolfram had to laugh at that. “You’ve been hanging around the Sage too much.”
Yuuri pouted, but let that last taunt go. “I still miss you playing the violin. Maybe we can learn some happy tunes?” Yuuri said hopefully.
Wolfram pulled away a little, smiled shyly and then replied “That’ll be nice. We can learn them together.”
by Sayo
Disclaimer: The Usual.
Beta: The unusually foxy DaystarsMom
Pairing: YuuRam
“Like it?” Yuuri asked with a touch of smugness as he showed Wolfram the new music room and artist’s studio.
Wolfram couldn’t believe his eyes.
He had always thought of his old bedroom as rather large, but now it looked cozy. Musical instruments of many kinds were displayed on mounts, with space where he could practice.
Gunter would love how this was organized, the young princeling thought, but he would never see it. Yuuri had sealed this room in so that only his and Wolfram’s power signatures were allowed inside - a way to keep privacy and security in check at the same time.
The walls were painted a burgundy shade and the trim was darkened oak. Wolfram touched the wall for a moment and then raised a dark gold brow at the king. The blond preened a little when Yuuri squirmed a bit under his scrutiny.
“Burgundy?” Wolfram asked in a purring voice.
Yuuri tugged at his collar. “Er, I - uh…” the Japanese boy stammered.
Wolfram smiled at his new husband brightly, and shamelessly batted his long, dark lashes at him. Feeling just a bit more coy, Wolfram drew close and casually ran his hand on Yuuri’s chest, briefly enjoying the sensation of smooth fabric over what he knew was smoother skin. Yum, Wolfram purred to himself, letting the vibrations from his throat jar Yuuri even more. And then Wolfram pulled gently away. “I like it, don’t worry,” the blond said.
He then showed Yuuri his back, and then his behind, as Wolfram bent over to flick imaginary dust off a viola and then blew upon it. Wolfram bit his lip to hide his smile upon hearing Yuuri gulp. And when Yuuri breathed a sigh of relief -- it was all Wolfram could do to keep from laughing.
"W-well uh... you have blond hair and your skin's very light, so uh... I thought the color would make you stand out -- er, more than usual, ya know?" Yuuri attempted to explain. His eyes went one way and then the other, setting his sights on everywhere but the all-too-happy Wolfram.
The Prince Consort peered at the sovereign from the corner of his catlike, lake-green eyes. “You’ve been… fantasizing.” The Nordic boy said coquettishly.
A drop of sweat rolled from Yuuri’s temple and into the collar of his shirt. Wolfram licked his lips as he followed its trail with his mind… straight into the gutter.
Yuuri crossed his arms over his chest. “Well, you married me. So don’t mind if I do,” his tone that of mock hurt.
“Touché, fiancé.” Wolfram replied, grinning seductively.
“That’s husband, Prince Wolfram. And unless you want me to claim you again right on this brand-new, very clean carpet -“
Wolfram clucked his tongue, smiled devilishly and waved a finger at his king. “Nuh-uh-uh!” he said in a sing-song manner. “Music now, play later.”
Yuuri smirked. “Okay. Focus,” the boy king pretended to brace himself although, Wolfram thought, Yuuri did look just the least bit ruffled from being shot down. Wolfram shrugged. Where was the fun in being too easy?
The musical instruments had also been wedding gifts, Wolfram realized as he slowly and carefully inspected each of them. Every instrument was obviously expensive and well-crafted, and Wolfram knew from sight they were all in perfect shape and tuning.
Knowing that Wolfram would spend a lot of time here, Yuuri had put small containers of Wolfram's favorite apple-based potpourri in every corner. It was a small detail, but a thoughtful one... or perhaps Yuuri hoped to chase away the scent of bearbee paint, should Wolfram ever think of using the easel that stood near the big bay windows.
Wolfram turned to Yuuri and said “I love it.”
Yuuri blushed and then, after he’d regained himself, he grinned. “You’re welcome.”
The blond smiled back and picked up a guitar and soon he was playing Pachelbel’s Canon, a piece which he had learned by ear from his many visits to Earth. Wolfram knew Yuuri was pleased that he’d picked up Depapepe’s modern version of the classic. The blond couldn’t imagine what Yuuri would think had Wolfram learned Yngwie Malmsteen’s take on it first, which to Wolfram sounded like “modern misery”. How disconcerting, all puns be pardoned.
Yuuri himself walked over to the baby grand piano and with one hand, he followed Wolfram’s plucked notes a couple steps higher to harmonize the sounds from both instruments. Being a baseball boy, Yuuri didn’t get very skillful at the piano, even though Miko had hired a piano teacher to come to the Shibuya home on weekends when Yuuri was small. So just a little, very subtly, Wolfram slowed down so Yuuri could play in time with him. Easy does it, always to Yuuri’s beat.
The boy king struck off-key notes time and again, but Wolf didn’t mind. Nope, there was no way on Earth or anywhere Yuuri could have become a virtuoso, but he could play passably without having to read notes. And as Wolfram expected, Yuuri’s other hand joined its partner on the keyboard and beautiful music filled the air.
When the two finished playing the simple but pretty piece, Yuuri closed the piano and then gestured for Wolfram to sit beside him.
Wolfram put the guitar in the case and leaned it back against the stand, securing the neck at the perch. The Prince Consort then took his seat beside the Monarch, who took Wolfram’s hand in his own. “We already have a lot of golden punch bowls so I thought I’d get word out that I wanted to build a music room for you as a wedding present.” Yuuri began. “I’d wanted to do just an art studio at first but since you had become so good at the violin, I thought better of it and built a place where you could practice and yet…” Yuuri trailed off.
Wolfram cocked his head to one side, curious. “And yet what, Yuuri?”
Yuuri sighed. “And yet you never picked up the violin again after I saw you that night, playing your solo to the sea when we were visiting Karbelnikov. Now it’s always the guitar or some other instrument but never the violin, and I was wondering why.”
Wolfram blushed and unconsciously gripped Yuuri’s hand tighter. Neither boy spoke a word for a few moments and then Wolfram chose to break the silence. He leaned his face towards Yuuri’s and then spoke softly. “That night when you found me at the beach...”
The boy king furrowed his brows at that. “Yes..?”
The Prince Consort sighed and looked away. “The violin is the closest to the voice in sound. When I was small, Mother had me learn the violin in hopes that it would help me channel my anger. It did nothing for my temper, but the violin helped me cry without tears.”
“Oh Wolf…”
Wolfram lowered his eyes before setting them once and for all on the violin that lay innocently in its case on top of the piano before which he and his husband sat.
“Yuuri, that night when you saw me… I was saying my goodbyes. To you, to my family, to everyone.”
“Wolf…”
The angelic-looking demon put his hand on the wooden cover of the piano, and felt the smooth coolness of the metal hinge that allowed it to be folded away after being raised. “It was the tenth year of our engagement and I saw no end in sight. I thought that if I gave myself over to the waves I would be able to free you and at the same time -“
Yuuri looked about ready to smash the baby grand in two. “Stop it! I don’t want to hear any more!” the sovereign said as he covered his ears.
But Wolfram was stronger than him and managed to lower one of Yuuri’s hands and then, afterwards, it was the blond who grasped Yuuri’s larger, baseball-hardened hand in his own tiny sword-calloused ones. “Listen.” Wolfram said.
Yuuri reluctantly agreed and then Wolfram continued. “I haven't touched the violin since tjat night because the next morning you told me you loved me. I have no need for it anymore."
Yuuri opened one eye, then the other, and looked upon his Prince curiously, the ruler's expression uncertain. “You’re sure? I want to make you happy but I... I don’t know if I can.”
Wolfram shook his head and smiled. “You do. I knew even then that if you loved me, I won’t ever be sad again.”
Yuuri looked into Wolfram’s eyes desperately. “And if I mess up, you’ll tell me? I don’t ever want to lose you, Wolf. Gods…" Yuuri groaned. "Thinking I had been so close, so close to losing you… I can’t imagine what life would be like without you.”
Wolfram smiled and shook his head again. “You didn’t lose me. That is that. And believe me, Yuuri: You’re the one who’ll never be free of me. I’ll find you in every lifetime and force you to love me.”
At that Yuuri pulled the blond into his arms, closed his own dark eyes, and filled his being with the scent of Wolfram. Of Mine. Of Always. “Next time, you won’t have to do that. I’ll come and find you. I’ll stalk you from babyhood if I have to,”
Wolfram had to laugh at that. “You’ve been hanging around the Sage too much.”
Yuuri pouted, but let that last taunt go. “I still miss you playing the violin. Maybe we can learn some happy tunes?” Yuuri said hopefully.
Wolfram pulled away a little, smiled shyly and then replied “That’ll be nice. We can learn them together.”