Good riddance!
So the other day I read through almost an entire year of old posts. Not just my posts, but his posts, too. "I miss you, Alex Spinosa" they constantly read. I remember back then how that made me feel. They made me feel great because I knew he meant them.
It's 6 years later, and I just don't believe the words anymore. Even though I want them to have an entirely different meaning, I just can't see the truth in your eyes.
I'm not looking to belong to you, I just want to be your friend. But I don't think I can do that without wanting to belong to the high school you. To the memory of the person who truly, genuinely missed me.
I don't want your friends confronting me, telling me about your current situation with some girl you constantly keep hooking up with, despite you telling me you want it to stop. I don't want them thinking I need to know this... I don't want to know. I don't care. But I hate that people still feel the need to tell me that you treat me horribly, even now that we barely talk.
I'm tired of thinking about you even when I don't care. As I said before, it doesn't make any sense.
Not being around you was the best choice I've made this semester. I miss everyone of my friends associated with you, but I just can't be around you. Sorry.
I just wish there was some way to find out if your words were simply a tactic to use me, as I can't help but feel they were. I want to know if you were lying. I want to know if you're constantly honest with me.. but there's no way to know because confronting you about it would only make things worse. Even if I heard you say they weren't a lie, I don't think I'd believe you.
I'm tired of this. This is the last post about you. I just can't deal with you anymore.
Good old livejournal, always a place to be totally honest and as emotional as you want. I've missed you.
It's 6 years later, and I just don't believe the words anymore. Even though I want them to have an entirely different meaning, I just can't see the truth in your eyes.
I'm not looking to belong to you, I just want to be your friend. But I don't think I can do that without wanting to belong to the high school you. To the memory of the person who truly, genuinely missed me.
I don't want your friends confronting me, telling me about your current situation with some girl you constantly keep hooking up with, despite you telling me you want it to stop. I don't want them thinking I need to know this... I don't want to know. I don't care. But I hate that people still feel the need to tell me that you treat me horribly, even now that we barely talk.
I'm tired of thinking about you even when I don't care. As I said before, it doesn't make any sense.
Not being around you was the best choice I've made this semester. I miss everyone of my friends associated with you, but I just can't be around you. Sorry.
I just wish there was some way to find out if your words were simply a tactic to use me, as I can't help but feel they were. I want to know if you were lying. I want to know if you're constantly honest with me.. but there's no way to know because confronting you about it would only make things worse. Even if I heard you say they weren't a lie, I don't think I'd believe you.
I'm tired of this. This is the last post about you. I just can't deal with you anymore.
Good old livejournal, always a place to be totally honest and as emotional as you want. I've missed you.