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[sayers_mcgrath]

ive never felt so sick in my life, and i just sit here shaking for some reason and its not helping me at all, ive never been attacked so hard last night by so many people that i did last night and in all seriousness im not stable enough to go through that again so im packing my shit and going back to newport, and going to live at my moms beach home

Comments

[c__ricci]

i can't believe how they attacked you. i can't get over that, its making me so angry. and mark, please stop apologising. neither of us did anything wrong here. i don't regret admitting my feelings to you. i needed to do it. i needed you to know. and i know the same goes for you.

they should never have attacked you like that. they don't even understand the whole situation. none of them sat down to even try and understand it. to try and understand how we feel about each other. their attacks are based on...bitterness. i hate how they've made you doubt yourself, especially when two of them are the same people who kept telling you how great you were and so on.

i don't blame you for leaving los angeles. i understand your reasons for doing it. and i don't see myself staying here if you're not here.

hope your life is better without me.

if only you knew how wrong you are about that. mark, i love you. nothing is going to change that. i want you in my life. not having you here is killing me.

and yes, i have your number and your address. i'll call you. i want to be where you are. right now. but i don't know if thats what you want.

[sayers_mcgrath]

i want you here.. i miss you so bad ricci, i just was so upset last night i didnt know what else to do beside get up and leave.. im in LA for tonight.. seein i havent talked to you, and hannah came up here with murf and i just had to get away. so im at jaimes and nikas.. ill have my cell on me all night as soon as you get around to it give me a call.. and i want to at least come over.. if you want me around.. i need to talk to you and i need to be with you i love you chrissy.. so much

-mark

[c__ricci]

of course i want you around mark. i'm glad you came back. i almost thought i'd lost you.

[sayers_mcgrath]

youd never lose me, even if you tried to, id still come back, im like a parasite.. i know you feel so much better now that i said that *laughs*

but seriously.. you wouldnt ever lose me, even if i feel like im about to lose it all and dont know where else to turn. as soon as i realize i still have you in my life id never turn away.. even if i do get upset.. ill never stay away from you. i love you babe

-Mark

[c__ricci]

it's just as well then that i don't mind parasites that come in the shape of mark mcgrath *laughs*

ok, my turn to be serious now...i feel so happy, content and loved when i'm with you. and when you're not there, i feel lost. so i'm glad we didn't lose each other. i don't think i would have coped if we had.

[sayers_mcgrath]

*laughs* hopefully im the only mark mcgrath around than

im glad i can make you feel that way babe.. you make me feel the same. i love you so much, im going to make sure we work.. nothin is going to break us apart

[c__ricci]

i'm going to make sure of that too :)