doo doot doo
I have successfully returned from my rescue mission! Even though that was 2 days ago or so, I'm still very proud of myself. Mark's car broke down while he was delivering pizza 'cause it overheated, and so his parents went and gave him their other car so that he could keep on being the pizza man and pizzinating (pronounced PEE-tzin-ATE-ing)the countryside. Then they called their towing company and were like, "Hey, we need towing." So the towing company was all like, "Okay," and they didn't come for about 2 hours, at which point Mrs. Mark's Mom called me and said that they needed picking up, for they were now without a functional car. Mark had brought MMM (Mrs. Mark's Mom, not Mr. Mighty Mouse or something) and Katie back to Pizza Hut with him, so we went there and rescued them! I got to drive, and I sang my rescue mission song for most of the way there. Not all of the way there, because I think my mom was about ready to kill me about 5 minutes into it. It went sort of like this, but I can't remember it in its super-awesome exact form. Ahem, hem. "RESCUE MISSION! Da-na, na. RESCUE MISSION! Da-na-na, na. Gonna go save the day! Days are gonna be saved, 'cause it's a RESCUE MISSION! *drum fill*" I was quite creative on that one, I must say. As soon as we got to Pizza Hut, we saw them out in the parking lot with a couple of pizzas on the hood of the car. Apparently the manager on duty was so happy that they got a car to Mark that they gave MMM and Katie a couple of free pizzas, which is pretty cool. So then we took them (I was still driving, woohoo!) to the place where the car was getting towed, which happened to be right next to a softball field. Katie and I could not help ourselves, so we mindlessly frolicked about in the outfield until we had to go. Then we uneventfully dropped them off at their house, except for MMD (Mr. Mark's Dad), who drove us back to our house so that they could have a car while Mark was at work. Then I went to sleep. Upon waking up the next day, I went to a softball game to watch my old travel team play part of a tournament. Incidentally, it was the field that was previously frolicked in by Katie and myself the night before. Hmmm. This is one for Sherlock and Watson, for it is a strange coincidence. They probably wouldn't want to come all the way from London to figure it out, anyway. That'd be a waste of plane tickets, seeing as they're ficticious and/or dead and whatnot. They probably wouldn't be much help anyway. But, the team obviously won because the field came pre-frolicked for them. I feel as though I have contributed and done my part, short of doing something that would actually be of some obscure use to anyone. Apparently my house lost power during that point in time when I was at the softball game, and so cooking and baking became somewhat challenging. My mom made the stuff that didn't actually need to be put in the oven and stuff first, because that made sense, I guess. Dirt was made, and it was yummy. Dirt is oreos, cool whip, and cream cheese all mixed together, and it tastes really really good. We made a bunch of other stuff, cleaned the kitchen, and went to the cookout (which I also got to drive to). Mark's dad's side of the family was all there, and they were fun people. Mark, Katie and I all felt the need to sample the dirt, and make sure that it wasn't, uh, poisoned or something, and that everyone else could safely eat it. This required a lot of testing, mind you. Upon completion of our testing, we concluded that yes, the dirt could be safely consumed and enjoyed by our fellow cookout-goers. Mark went off to work, and Katie and I decided to be antisocial and play some Uno by ourselves, inside, where it was cold. She kicked my butt all three times, and then we went outside and swam and played games with her cousins and my brother on the trampoline, and I acquired a food name! I feel honored. All of her friends have food names, and so I finally got one. She's "Cheeto", and I'm "Waffle". Then I said something that sounded perfectly decent, and her sick and twisted mind started working, and she laughed at me, and then I put my mind into a sick and twisted gear, and I retracted my comment, but alas, it was too late. She decided that Mark's name should be "Syrup", and I made a face and went and hid in the corner of her round trampoline, and I told her that she made me sad. *Pout.* She said that I wouldn't mind if Johnny Depp was Syrup, and I made another face, and then I laughed. Now that I think of it, real maple syrup isn't all that good. I like the fake stuff, but not the lite fake stuff. 'Cause that's gross, kinda like Katie's mind!!!! Okay, I'm done with that. On to other stuff. I got to sleep over their house last night, and I went to bed at like 2 AM and got up at like 9 and went to Cookie's for breakfast with MMM and Katie. Mark was a lazy-butt and didn't get up until noon, so we went without him. I had a bagel and homefries, and life was good. Then we went back to their house and I kinda hung out there and Mark woke up and we hung out and then he had to go to work and I had to go home and stack wood and write this. Actually, I didn't really have to write this, but I thought that for some reason you might take an interest in my pathetic daily exercises. Which, might I mention, are quite amusing to me. Like today, when Katie fell off the couch and I laughed for about 5 minutes straight. It wasn't really the fact that she fell off the couch, it was more of the way that she did it. I didn't find it all that amusing when I sorta rolled off, but she made a weird face and kinda stuck her butt out and rolled (she's gonna kill me for writing it like that, but that's what happened. I'm a reporter, I'm concerned with what happened and which celebrity was potentially involved or affected or became available for comment! The sticking of the butt in the air was crucial to the particular style in which she gradually and altogether suddenly removed herself from the furniture designed especially for relaxing and perhaps rolling. The wide plaid pattern with which the cushioned couch was adorned accented the young woman's bright red blouse, making the fall more obvious and altogether amusing. Her somewhat surprised, somewhat apathetic expression added to the hilarity of the given moment, causing this reporter to roll hopelessly on the floor for the following minutes, consumed entirely in a fit of laughter. Reporting to you post-occurence, this is Jess, ABCDE News. Back to you with current events, George. "All right, thanks, Jess. Today, Senator and President-hopeful John Kerry announced that he will be laying the smackdown upon current President George W. Bush. 'Oh, you can't see the smack, can you?' said Kerry in an interview Thursday. 'That's right, because it's being laid down. Waaaayyy down.' In response, the president announced that he would be upping his defenses by increasing his offense. 'Uh, yeah. Well, I'm the one commanding the army here! Me, not you! I've got bazookas and tanks and high-tech thingies. No touchie.' The president was then hushed by his press representative, who offered up an apology, and said that Bush was on crack.") Ha, bet you didn't know that I still had my parentheses going! Or maybe you did, and you were laughing at me, thinking that I'd forget and wouldn't close them! Wahahaha!! I got you either way! Or, if you knew they were still going and weren't surprised that I finally closed them, I congratulate you. You get a sticker. Okay, I think I'm done ranting, and you probably have something to do. So get along, little duckies, get along real slow.