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why is there so much that i want to say that i can't find the words for? why is there so much angst and pain in the world? why is high school so stressing? why is life so stressing? why does life have to be so hard? why can't i seem to stay happy for more than ten minutes nowadays? why i am constantly fighting with my friends? why is it that i fail the tests i study for and ace the ones i don't? why is it that i have this constant feeling of guilt even though i'm not conscious of doing anything wrong? why is it that there's never enough time for anything? why is it that i feel like i'm missing out on the most important part of my life? why does it feel like no one's ever there when i need them? why does it feel like i'm on the outside looking in? why is it that i always feel exhausted? why is it that i never seem to be able to get the things i want the most badly?