Fic: Without Stripes You're Just You (Aiden/Matt, PG-13, AU)
Without Stripes You’re Just You
Zoo!AU, where everyone works in a zoo. In an imaginary zoo, I might add.
DISCLAIMER: Not real. I own nothing.
Matt/Aiden, (Liam/Louis), Pg-13, ~7,500 words.
A/N: For horopter. Ilu ♥ I hope you like it sweetie. Thank you so, so much comeoutcomeout for betaing. You’re amazing. ♥ All the remaining mistakes are mine.
**
The zebra looks at him sadly.
“I know,” Aiden sighs and kicks the ground. “But it’s not like I can just go to him and ask him out, you know?”
The zebra blinks, slowly, and turns his head, so the sole focus of his left eye is on Aiden.
“Because he would say no, that’s why!” Aiden says, frustrated.
The zebra snorts.
“Oh, you’re in an impossible mood today, aren’t you?”
The zebra just turns his head and smiles his zebra-tastic smile at Aiden, all yellow teeth and pink gums.
Aiden sighs. “Yeah, yeah. Tell the guys I’ll come and clean the water points later.” Aiden puts his lunchbox into his bag. “I need to go and see the birds. They’ve been eating and pooping all morning now. I’m pretty sure they can’t wait to see me.”
The zebra keeps looking at Aiden, but fails to come across sympathetic.
Aiden grins at him. “Good try, mate. I’ll see ya.” He walks around the fencing and through the gate to the public area. A woman with two small children smiles at him and Aiden gives them a small wave. It’s a beautiful day and there are a lot of people walking around, smiling and taking pictures.
He goes first to the staff room to put his backpack into his locker. There is a poster of a walrus with a heavy moustache and beard on the wall, and under the picture - in big red letters - it reads: “IN CUSTOMER SERVICE IT IS IMPORTANT TO TAKE CARE OF YOU LOOKS.” Someone has written under that that means you Storm: stop scaring the kids!! with a black sharpie.
Aiden leaves and makes sure the door is locked behind him. He takes one of the red staff bicycles to get to the Birdhouse faster. He goes past the Monkey Island and the Snake House, waves at the giraffes, and smiles at people he passes. He goes through the narrow gate and leaves the bike next to the other ones at the back of the enclosure.
It’s a madhouse inside as usual. The noise and humid air hit his face like a wall. It’s almost like stepping into another dimension.
“A jungle in the middle of England,” Aiden murmurs quietly in a low voice. “See a part of the Amazon for only fifteen pounds.”
One thing Aiden has learnt since starting work at the zoo is that when you have a hangover, you should avoid going inside the Birdhouse at all costs. You can get used to the general smell of the zoo, but noise is a bit different, and the birds are never, ever quiet. Sometimes it seems they’re trying to out-scream each other. They are talkative, always, regardless of the weather outside.
“Hello,” Aiden says to a vet who smiles at him while rushing past him. She has a cage with her, but it appears to be empty.
“Hi, Aiden,” she says, smiling.
Aiden feels that most of the birds have gotten used to him by now, and usually he hums quietly while working inside the cages. It calms the birds somewhat; they don’t seem so threatened. There is one loud-mouthed bright green parakeet with a very sharp beak who likes to come and sit on Aiden’s shoulder and insult him while he tries to work. “Idiot,” the parakeet says, or shrills in most cases, “idiot, idiot, idiot!” His other favourites upon seeing Aiden are “twat” and “arse”. Aiden has started to call him Louis, to Louis’ utter annoyance, after hearing the witty parakeet address the girls giggling outside the glass “hey baby”.
“One thing I don’t understand,” Aiden said to Louis, “is why it doesn’t call me ‘baby’.”
Louis snorted, pulled Aiden to his side and ruffled his hair. “It’s because the bird has a good taste in men. And aw, Aid, I didn’t know you were jealous!”
Aiden flipped Louis off, but that only made him laugh louder.
Aiden likes the birds, though. They are pretty and colourful, and most of the time the cacophony of noise would actually manage to lull him deep into his own thoughts.
When Aiden is finished with the cages, he looks around to see he hasn’t forgotten anything. There are a two teenage girls looking at him, and when he smiles at them, they turn hastily away, giggling. Aiden rolls his eyes; he is never going to understand girls.
He goes back outside and squints at the blue sky. He really needs a smoke.
Looking at his watch he realises he could still have a break before going to see the zebras for the last time. He jumps back onto his bike and manoeuvres through the gate which is always so much more complicated from that direction; it’s like the Birdhouse doesn’t want him to leave. Well, that or the gate hates him. “A personal vendetta against my awesome quiff,” he murmurs, speeding down a small hill.
“Hey Aid!”
Aiden looks around and stops. “Oh, hey Liam. What’s up?”
Liam shrugs. “Nothing much. It’s a busy day at the gates.”
Aiden hums. “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” Liam sighs, looks around him “It’s just so sad that for most of these kids this is going to be their only chance to experience wildlife.” He turns his sad eyes back to Aiden. “And all these animals, they have no idea what it is like to be truly free.”
Aiden clears his throat. “Yeah. At least they have shelter. And like, food.”
Liam sighs again, heavily.
Aiden resists the urge to pat Liam’s shoulder reassuringly. “I have to go, mate. But I’ll see you around, yeah?”
“Sure,” Liam says, managing to give a small smile to Aiden that has most of the girls at the gates buying season tickets.
They like to come every day and stare at Harry and Liam adoringly. Zayn kept saying the zoo should charge extra for that. “They could just put them behind glass and girls would come in droves to watch them.”
Louis looked dauntingly intrigued by the idea. “But what would they do in their cage all day, though?”
Zayn shrugged, not fussed. “I dunno. Watch TV. Play games. Whatever they wanted. It’s not like the girls would mind.”
“And I bet casual nakedness wouldn’t hurt either,” Louis said, leering.
But thus far the zoo hasn’t seized that spectacular business opportunity and Harry, Liam, Niall, Zayn and Louis all work at the ticket office. Cher says it’s sexist, the way there are no women working there, but she’s happy working in the gift shop herself. She gets to paint pictures of animals on children’s faces. She says she wants to become a makeup artist some day. “Open up my own salon or do makeup for fashion editorials,” she says, eyes big, her hair up in a big bun over her head. Some of the kids call it a bird nest, but never so that Cher would actually hear them say so.
Aiden leaves his bicycle in the back. The zebras have already been fed, so all Aiden has to do is to make sure the water points are clean.
He’s sweating when he’s done. “Okay guys,” he says to the zebras that are hanging around. “I’m all done. I’ll see you guys tomorrow.”
He goes to wash his hands. He can’t wait to get into a shower to wash all the dirt and muck away. He finds it astonishing how the dirt seems to get absorbed into his skin even through his clothes.
“Hey.”
Aiden jumps. “Oh, hey Matt. I didn’t see you.” Matt’s standing at the gate, his old hat on his head, gritty Jeans rolled up to his knees.
“Yeah,” Matt rubs the back of his neck. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you.” He pulls the cap lower like he wants to hide.
“You didn’t! I mean, um,“ Aiden clears his throat. “What’s up?”
There’s a small smile on Matt’s face that makes his eyes crinkle adoringly. “I was just back at the vets' and---“ He fidgets. “The twin Spectacled Bears are doing great. And, er. You really should go and see them before they grow to be mean man-eaters and lose their appeal to be petted.”
Aiden tilts his head, questioning. “I thought Spectacled Bears were vegetarian?”
Matt laughs. “Yeah, mostly. But they’re still a bit scary when they’re all grown up, you know.”
Aiden grins. “Well, yeah. But only because they look like they could still bite your head off.”
“So,” Matt says, looking around. “Are you all done for today?”
Aiden nods. “Yeah, I can’t wait to get home.” He rubs his wet hands absent-mindedly against his thighs.
“Yeah, you need a lift?”
“No,” Aiden bites his lip. “I mean, I have a car, so.”
“Oh.” Matt looks down at his shoes.
“But thanks, for, you know, asking.” Aiden can feel himself blushing and he looks away.
“That’s okay. If you ever need a lift, or you know, something, just ask, okay?”
“Yeah, sure mate. Thanks.”
Matt smiles at him then, warm and genuine. “Any time. Well, I better go. There’s some kind of problem with the elephants, so I have to see what that’s about.”
“Yeah, okay.”
He watches as Matt walks to his truck and gets in. He only realizes he’s still staring, when Matt grins at him through the car window and gives him a wave before driving away.
“Shit,” Aiden says and hastily looks away. “Fucking hell.”
There’s a sound that Aiden swears is the equivalent of zebra laughter.
“Oh, shut up,” he says before stomping away.
**
Aiden goes home. He drums his thumbs against the steering wheel in time with the music. “Hello!” he yells when he steps inside the house and goes up to his room.
He lies on his bed and stares at the white ceiling. “I’m missing something,” he says out loud, because he can’t shake the odd feeling. There’s a weird pressure on his chest.
He puts his headphones on and turns the music up so loud it’s almost impossible to think. He closes his eyes.
He wakes up two hours later feeling groggy. “Shit,” he says as he gets up and goes to the bathroom to have a wash. He looks at himself in the mirror. His hair is sticking out in every direction and his eyes are red. “Bloody Mr. England,” he grumps. “You could be a fucking supermodel, mate,” he tells himself before flicking the light out and going downstairs to get something to eat.
**
The next day, Louis is waiting for Aiden at the parking lot. “Morning, sunshine!” he yells, getting up from the curb. There’s an extra spring in his step.
Aiden glowers at him. “Why are so chipper?” he asks, suspicious.
Louis only shrugs. “Because it’s a fantastic morning! Also, I need your help.”
Aiden stares at Louis, but he only keeps looking back at him with puppy dog eyes. “What did you do?”
“Nothing!” Louis throws up his hands, trying to look innocent.
“If you’re in trouble again for prank calling someone you shouldn’t have, I want nothing to do with it.”
Louis looks annoyed. “It’s nothing like that. It’s um.” His nose crinkles in a way Aiden absolutely refuses to find adorable.
“What?”
“I want to make Liam smile more,” Louis says after a pause, looking determined.
Aiden blinks. “You want to make Liam smile?”
Louis fidgets. “Well, yeah. I mean, he’s such a sad panda all the time, and even the girls have started to give him worried glances. It can’t be good for business!”
“Uh, so you want to make Liam smile because it’s good for business?”
“Yes. No! I mean,” Louis sighs. “I just want to make him happy, okay? I don’t want him to quit because he hates it here.” Aiden’s pretty sure Louis actually blushes at that.
“Well, why don’t you ask him to do something he likes?”
Louis tilts his head. “Like what?”
Aiden groans. “I dunno. Ask him to see a film or something.”
“What, like a date?” But Louis looks more intrigued than panicked by the thought.
“Well, yeah? Or like, a man date. I don’t know!”
“Hmm, but I can’t just go and ask him out out of the blue!”
Aiden resists the urge to roll his eyes. It’s something he has to do a lot when dealing with Louis. “Sure you can. But maybe you need some time to think it over. We should get going though, or we’re both going to be late.”
“Yeah, I need a plan.” Louis grins and hits Aiden on the shoulder. “Thanks, mate.”
“You’re welcome?” Aiden says and thinks he should probably warn Liam. But on the other hand, he’s a little too curious to see the chaos that is about to happen.
**
In the afternoon, Matt comes to see Aiden again while he’s busy feeding the zebras.
“What? Did you look up my schedule?” Aiden asks without thinking it through, and watches in amusement as Matt blushes.
“Maybe,” Matt says, trying to look nonchalant. “So, are zebras like your favourite?”
Aiden shrugs, leaning on his pitchfork. “Maybe,” he says. “They are pretty amazing. I mean, they have stripes, they’re practically horses’ cool cousins.”
Matt laughs. “So, you like stripes, huh?”
Aiden grins, relaxing. “Yeah, I mean. Do you know what a stallion said to a zebra, when the zebra asked what it was that stallions did?”
Matt tilts his head, looking bemused. “What?”
Aiden leans closer to Matt and says in a deep voice: “Take off your pyjamas and I’ll show you.”
Matt blinks before his whole face is taken over by a huge smile. “Man, that was actually a pretty good one.”
Aiden bites his bottom lip, looks down at his shoes. “Yeah. I mean, I like zebras. I mean, they should look stupid, but they don’t. It’s pretty awesome.”
“Yeah, I got that,” Matt smiles. “Hey, if you’re free tomorrow, I have this gig. I mean it’s nothing fancy, just a small one in an old pub, but if you wanted, you could come? It’s just me and my friend Ali playing covers, but we’re pretty alright.”
Aiden blinks and Matt keeps looking somewhere over his right shoulder. “You play music?”
Matt looks him straight in the eye. “Yeah? I mean, I haven’t told you? I sing and play the guitar.”
“So, are you any good, or do your friends and family support you out of pity?” Aiden grins, trying to lighten up the mood.
Matt shrugs, a frown appearing onto his face. “Well, I used to thinks so but it’s fucking hard out there, you know? So I don’t know. But I love it.” He shrugs again, a bit helplessly.
“Oh,” Aiden says. “But tomorrow, right?”
“Yeah.”
“How late are you guys playing? I mean, I’m babysitting--- I mean,” but it’s too late, and Aiden can actually feel how red his face is turning.
Matt grins. “You’re babysitting? One job isn’t enough for you?
Aiden cringes, stares at Matt’s shoes. “Yeah, my mum is busy so I’m looking after my sister.”
“Oh,” Matt says. “That’s cool.”
Aiden looks up. “Yeah?”
“Yeah, we start probably at nine. It’s the pub at the bottom of the high street, The King’s Head? Think you can make it?”
“Sure.” And he smiles at Matt who returns the smile, and for a second he looks like he’s leaning closer, but then he blinks and takes a step back.
“Anyway, I’ll see you then. Take good care of those zebras!” He grins over his shoulder before walking away.
“Yeah!” Aiden yells after him, and instantly winces. ”Yeah?” he says to himself. “Jeez, could I be any cooler?” He snorts. ”Take off your pyjamas. Way to go, mate.”
The zebras just look lazily at him. He’s sure one of them is slowly shaking its head.
**
The next day doesn’t start well. He almost oversleeps and has no time to eat a real breakfast; only manages to grab an apple and eat it in the car on his way to the zoo. Only when he’s changing into his work clothes does he notice he had his shirt on backwards.
Nothing special happens at work. Some parents call because of Nicolo, their most popular tour guide, who had said something to a group of kids that resulted in them asking difficult questions to their parents.
“It’s not my fault if the animals don’t follow their parents’ high moral codes,” Nicolo says lounging in the office. “For fuck’s sake, they wanted them to learn about animals and all I told them were the facts. They could just find them on Wikipedia themselves.”
Aiden also tells the zebras about the gig Matt invited him to. “I mean, it’s not like it’s a date, right? But he did invite me, so that has to mean something, right?”
The zebras just keep eating, looking unconvinced.
“Yeah,” Aiden sighs. “I didn’t even know he sings, you know? Why is he so cool? I’m sure he thinks I’m just some idiot kid.” He frowns unhappily at the ground. “Maybe I shouldn’t even go. It’s not like I’m going to know anyone there anyway.” He hangs his head in defeat. “I’m such a loser,” he mumbles.
The zebras give a collective sigh.
**
“Okay, I’m home!” his mum yells as soon as she has opened the door. Aiden rushes to the front door.
“You’re late!” he accuses, snatching his car keys from the table.
Joanna just rolls her eyes. “Yeah, well, Mrs Collins had a lot to say.” She reaches to touch his hair, but at the last second Aiden manages to dodge.
“Mum! he says and checks in the mirror that his hair is still looking fine. Because his mum is evil, she just grins.
“Have fun, dear. And don’t bring anyone back I wouldn’t approve of.”
“Mum! Stop it. You’re not as cool as you like to think you are.”
“Sure I am,” she says.
His mum is actually looking a bit misty-eyed, so he relents and gives her a hug. “Bye, mum,” he says.
“Have fun, and drive safely! And don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!”
**
But because there is no god, Aiden finds himself standing on the side of the road, his car’s hood popped open. He stares at the engine, miserable.
“Not now, Sylv. Please!” But it’s no use. It’s not like Aiden can make the smoke disappear. He’s not a magician.
He sniffs, but it’s only because it’s a bit chilly outside.
He looks around, cars driving past him. He gives up and calls a garage.
**
“Ah, stop moping. You have savings, don’t you?” his mum says, giving him a cup of tea.
“Yeah,” he sighs. He was actually saving so he could move out, but that’s a touchy subject with his mum.
“Or you could always buy a new car? I don’t like the idea of your car breaking down and leaving you stranded somewhere in the middle of the night.”
Aiden pouts at his tea. “How am I going to get to work now?”
“Well,” she says after a pause, “I think you have heard of these things called buses? They drive people around. You could always consider that.”
“Ha ha,” he says. “You’re hilarious.”
“Well I like to think so,” she says. “Go on, have a biscuit. You’ll feel better.”
Aiden relents and takes one. He hates to admit it, but his mum is right and it does make him feel better. Then he looks at the time and sighs heavily again. Matt’s going to hate him; he’s going to think Aiden didn’t want to come, when it was all his stupid car’s fault. He doesn’t even have Matt’s number, and he realises it’s now unlikely he’ll ever have it, because Matt’s going to hate him!
“Chin up, it’s going to be a new day tomorrow!” Joanna says cheerily. “You can always try to meditate on the bus, or you know, read a book. You might even find it refreshing.”
**
It is a new day tomorrow. Aiden has to wake up a lot earlier so he can catch the right bus. He’s sleepy and moody, and goes to sit at the back of the bus and listens to his iPod. There’s gum on the back of the seat in front of him and he stares at it disgusted.
He’s a bit early when he gets to the zoo, so he walks slowly towards the employee entrance.
“Hey! Aid, wait up!”
Aiden turns, but it’s only Louis running up to him across the parking lot.
“Hey,” Aiden says when Louis catches up with him.
“Hey man, what’s up?”
Aiden shrugs. “Car broke down.”
“Aw, that sucks!” Louis tries to look sorry, but he’s practically vibrating with energy. “So, guess what?”
“What?” Aiden says, uses his keys to open the gate.
“I asked Liam out yesterday, and he said yes!”
Aiden is actually surprised Louis acted on his advice. Well, that and a bit jealous. “You did?”
“Yeah, it was epic, man. I sent him this text, right? So I wrote, why do pandas like old films? and after a moment, I sent because they are black and white! Get it?” Louis actually laughs at his own joke.
“Yeah,” Aiden laughs because Louis’ good mood is actually catching. “That was pretty clever of you.”
“Well, Liam sent me back haha very funny, but then I sent him, so, wanna go? And he said sure!” Louis is smiling so wide it must be hurting his cheeks.
“Well done,” Aiden says. “Okay, lets change, or we are both going to be late. Again.”
“But you think Liam likes me, right?” Louis asks. “He wouldn’t have said yes otherwise?”
Aiden sighs. “Yeah, I think Liam’s crazy about you. Now shut up.”
**
Aiden manages to avoid meeting Matt. That, or - he realises with a sinking heart - Matt is avoiding him. But he doesn’t want to think about option number two, because that only makes his chest hurt, and he doesn’t like that one bit.
Aiden stares at the zebras morosely. “I don’t know why I keep talking to you. I mean, I know if I painted a wall with black and white stripes you guys would go and hang around in front of it.” He wipes his nose onto his sleeve. “It’s not like I’m one of you. I don’t have stripes.”
It seems that for once he has the zebras’ undivided attention. “It’s not like you’re going to miss me when I’m gone.”
He finishes his work in silence, and by the time he’s done it has started to rain. He goes to take all the tools back to the shed, and then gives the zebras - who are now huddling together in the rain - one last look before walking away.
**
Because it’s just his luck, the bus is pulling away when he steps out of the gate. “Shit,” he says, and because he can feel water dripping down his neck and under his shirt, there’s no point in running. It’s impossible for him to get any wetter.
He jumps over a puddle, barely managing not to trip over his own feet. He goes to look at the timetable when he finally reaches the bus stop. He looks at his watch. “Fifteen minutes?” He groans. “You’ve got to be kidding me!”
He starts to shiver. He’s actually only starting to feel cold now that he’s out of the rain. That doesn’t make any sense, he thinks, and checks the time again. He decides to walk to the next stop, just to make him feel a bit warmer.
The bus driver gives him a disapproving look when he steps inside. His teeth are chattering and he’s miserable in his wet clothes.
He actually runs home when he gets off the bus, because he can’t wait to get out of his wet clothes.
“Oh,” his mum says by way of a greeting. “Well, take a hot shower. Dinner should be ready by then anyway. And put your wet clothes somewhere to dry!”
**
Aiden wakes up slowly the next morning, and it feels like his head is trying to kill him. His throat hurts, and even thinking about moving is too much effort.
“Mum,” he croaks. “Mum!”
“What is it?” His mum comes in. “Oh,” and she comes to sit on the bed, her hand feels cold against his forehead. “Sweetie, you have a high fever.” She runs her hand through his sweaty hair. “You have to call work and tell them you can’t come today. I’ll go to the pharmacy later.”
Aiden just closes his eyes and breathes against his pillow. He wants to sleep forever.
**
Aiden sleeps through the day. In the evening his mum brings him some soup and he manages to eat that. Then he watches some TV before he passes out again.
Next day he’s feeling a bit better. He drinks a lot of tea and orange juice. He watches Ghostbusters and some random videos from YouTube that amuse him.
He’s lying on his bed, has his earphones on, when his mum’s head pops in. “Aiden?” she says, eyes twinkling.
He takes out the earphones. “What?”
“There’s someone here to see you?”
Aiden sits up. “To see me? But why---“
And it’s Matt. Of course it’s Matt, because the universe hates Aiden and it doesn’t care that Aiden is looking like shit, that he’s wearing his rattiest t-shirt, and that his hair is greasy and disgusting.
“Oh, hi,” Aiden says in a small voice, that no matter what someone might say isn’t a squawk.
“Hey.” Matt looks uncomfortable. “You okay, man? I mean---“
“Yeah, yeah. Just a flu. That’s what you get, running around in the rain, and, um.”
Matt tilts his head. “Why were you running around in the rain?”
Aiden tugs at the covers. “Well, I missed the bus, and since I already was soaked, I thought, what the hell, and walked to the next stop.”
Matt looks bemused. “But I thought you had a car?”
“Well,” Aiden swallows. “It broke? And man, I was seriously coming to see your gig, honest, but my car broke down, and I didn’t have your number, so I couldn’t call you. And then I felt bad for, you know, not coming, and I thought---“
Matt interrupts him. “Hey, hey, it’s okay. Seriously. Just, give me your phone and I’ll give you my number so next time you can let me know.”
“Uh, sure.” Aiden tries not to fidget while he watches Matt typing his number into his phone.
“I’m’ma call myself so I’ll have yours too.” Matt waits until his own phone rings once. “There.” He hands Aiden his phone back.
“Thanks.” Aiden doesn’t know where to look. He feels like a bloody Victorian heroine, lying on his bed like this, pale and sickly. “Wait, how did you even know where I lived?”
Matt blinks, twice, before looking guiltily away. “Louis might have told me. He, er, might have also told me to come and see you.”
“Oh, Louis did, did he?” He’s going to kick Louis’ arse. As soon as he has his strength back, that is.
“Yeah,” Matt looks around his room. “Nice room by the way. Cool posters. Hey, you play the guitar?”
Aiden tries to hide his blush by staring at his lap. “Some. I’m not very good at it. But I’m learning!”
“Hey, we should totally jam together some time. That would be amazing!” Matt sounds genuinely excited, so Aiden looks up and Matt’s looking at him, smiling.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah, definitely.” Matt nods, and only then seems to notice the laptop on Aiden’s lap. “Oh, did I interrupt or something?”
“No, no, I was just watching these videos on YouTube. There’s this one guy, who can like play every instrument ever invented, and he’s uploaded all these songs. He’s amazing.”
“Really?” Matt comes and perches on the bed next to Aiden. “Can I see?”
“Sure,” and so he finds himself watching videos with Matt and talking about music, until he starts to yawn.
“Oh, hey, sorry. You should have said something.” Matt says, getting up. He reaches for the covers so he could tuck Aiden in, but Aiden stops him, wraps his fingers around Matt’s wrist.
“No, no! It’s okay. Maybe I’m not that well yet. But I’ll be back at work in a day or two, though.”
“Yeah,” Matt says in a quiet voice.
Aiden’s throat feels dry. “So I’ll see you then?”
“Sure.” And Matt gives him his warmest smile that makes his eyes crinkle. Only then does Aiden realise he’s still holding Matt’s wrist, and he lets go quickly. He feels the flush climbing all the way to his ears.
“Um.”
“Well,” Matt takes a couple steps towards the door, “you take care, yeah? Also, the zebras miss you. I tried to tell them you were coming back, but I’m pretty sure they didn’t understand me.”
Aiden smiles, pleased. “Yeah, okay. Thanks for coming by.”
Matt gives him one fond look before disappearing through the door that closes with a soft click.
Aiden stares at it, like the door is just going to disappear and prove everything only happened inside Aiden’s feverish brain. But the door remains where it is, and he can hear his mum and Matt talking downstairs, and then the front door opening and closing.
Aiden lies back down, closes his eyes. “My life is actually insane,” he tells the empty room.
**
Aiden’s back at work. He had gotten one text from Matt the day before - hope u r feeling better . . . :) XX - that had made Aiden grin like an idiot the rest of the day. His mum had smiled at him knowingly, but even that couldn’t deflate his mood. Because Matt actually texted him!
Aiden had responded, something inane, after which he hadn’t heard from Matt. Aiden had picked his phone up a couple of times, but he didn’t want to appear too interested, in case Matt just wanted to be his friend. So he hadn’t sent him another text. He kept thinking he should have sent Matt something cleverer, though.
“He thinks I’m an idiot,” he says to himself.
“Who thinks you’re an idiot?” Niall asks.
“Uh, no one?”
Niall looks at him, amused. “O-kay. Matt was looking for you, by the way.”
Aiden perks up. “He was?”
Niall smirks. “Yeah. Anyway, I gotta go, I left Zayn and Harry alone in the ticket office and that’s never good.”
Aiden walks a bit faster. The zebras look delighted to see him. “Hey guys,” Aiden says. “I actually missed your stupid faces.”
A zebra neighs in response and Aiden grins so wide his cheeks hurt.
**
They happen to have their lunch break at the same time. They sit at the picnic tables outside the staff house. There are birds singing in the trees around them and the sun feels warm on their skin.
“So,” Aiden asks, “how long have you been working here?”
Matt licks his fingers clean, and even though it’s kinda gross, it’s also surprisingly hot. “I started a little over a year ago. Before that I did all kinds of shitty jobs, but I like it here. The animals are amazing, even though sometimes I get a bit tired of smelling of dung and sweat.” He smirks.
“You don’t smell that bad,” Aiden says before he can stop himself. “Um.”
“Well thanks,” Matt says, grinning. He finishes his sandwiches and digs out his smokes. “Want one?” He offers the pack to Aiden, who takes one. Matt reached over the table to light Aiden’s cigarette, and his fingers accidentally brush against Aiden’s cheek.
“Thanks,” Aiden manages, a bit breathless, watching as Matt lights his own cigarette and takes a long drag. Aiden realises he’s staring at Matt’s mouth, so he looks away.
They sit in a comfortable silence. “We should go and eat sushi some day,” Matt says after a while. “There’s this new Japanese restaurant, we should check it out. Have you ever eaten sushi? I fucking love sushi.” His eyes are focused on Aiden as he takes one last drag before stabbing his cigarette in the ceramic ashtray on the table.
Aiden blinks. “Sure,” he says. “That would be cool.”
“Yeah?” Matt sounds pleased. “Cool.” He looks at his watch. “Shit, I have to go. I have to drive to the airport to get a packet from Customs. The zoo ordered some new toys for the seals.”
“Okay, I’ll see you?” Aiden says and winces when it comes out like a question.
“You bet,” Matt says, and smiles his tad askew smile before hurrying away.
**
“So,” Louis says, “how are you two lovebirds doing?”
Aiden frowns. “What? Who?”
Louis actually rolls his eyes. “You and Matt, you twat!” He blinks, before a wide grin breaks across his face. “Hey, that actually rhymes! Maybe I should become a poet! Matt the twat who, um, spat? Hey, do you know if Matt swallows or---“
“No! Don’t say it!” Aiden puts his hand over Louis mouth. He only removes his hand when Louis licks his palm. “Ew,” he grimaces. “You don’t know where my hand has been!”
Louis leers and Aiden hits him onto his shoulder. “Not that! But this is a fucking zoo! You could get, like, fucking salmonella or something!”
“Aw, you worry too much. I’ve all my vaccinations in order.” He frowns. “At least I think I do.”
“You’re impossible,” Aiden says. “I don’t know how Liam puts up with you.”
Louis quirks his eyebrows. “There are perks to hanging out with me. First of all, I’m very flexible; secondly, I’m very imaginative, and ---“
“Oh god, just shut up!” Aiden says and covers his ears. “I don’t want to know about your sex life!”
“Aw, mate,” Louis says, wrapping an arm around Aiden’s shoulders. “Am I hurting your sensibilities? Oh, look, isn’t that Matt?”
Aiden turns to look, and yes, it is Matt. It’s Matt with some woman. Aiden frowns at them.
“Who is she?” Louis asks. “Dang, she’s hot!”
Aiden watches as the woman laughs, her head tilting back, her hand resting on Matt’s arm. Matt grins; he looks happy that he managed to make the woman laugh.
“I have to go,” Aiden says. He turns around so he doesn’t have to look at Matt with that woman. “I’ll see you,” he says to Louis before practically running away.
**
Aiden is not avoiding Matt, regardless what the zebras think. “You should have seen her!” Aiden vents, viciously poking the hay bale with his pitchfork. “She was all over him! And he did nothing! Just stood there like a, like a---” he looks around him. “Like a sloth! Like he didn’t have two fine legs so he could walk away!” He pauses, stares down sullenly. “And Louis is right. She was hot.” He almost spits the last bit out like the words are poisonous.
The zebras all hang their heads, sad.
Aiden sighs. “I know. My own fault for thinking there was something between us, huh?”
When he gets back to his locker at the end of the day, there are three missed calls from Matt. Aiden stares at his phone for a while before ignoring them. He just wants to go home and hide from the world. And eat biscuits. And possibly listen to Damian Rice.
**
Matt sends him a text later that night. what’s up?? didnt see u today. u okay?
Aiden hits delete as fast as he can. After a while Matt tries to call him but he ignores it. Matt also sends him another text, ?? :(, but after that he doesn’t try to contact him again.
Aiden feels restless. He also feels like he wants to cry, but he’s not going to. Instead he goes outside to smoke a cigarette or two.
He stands in the back garden and thinks. He thinks about Matt, about his easy smile and the warmth of his voice. Aiden doesn’t understand why he is so mesmerized by him; Matt’s just a regular guy. Who just happens to know a lot about music and who Aiden maybe wants to snog. Aiden sighs. He can still hear the sounds of the street from here, but it’s quieter, calmer. “I don’t have a crush on Matt,” he tries. He takes one last drag before stomping the cigarette-butt into the ground and goes back inside.
Because he knows the truth, and the truth is, he’s fucked.
**
“What’s up, princess?” his mum asks the next morning when Aiden sits at the kitchen table and sips moodily at his tea.
Aiden sighs. “I don’t really feel like going to work today, that’s all.”
His mum frowns. “Are you getting sick again?” She touches his cheek, his forehead. “Your skin doesn’t feel hot.”
Aiden turns his head away. “It’s not that,” he says.
His mum is quiet for a while. “Well, if you’re not sick, you should get to work. That’s how it is. Welcome to adulthood.” She claps him onto his shoulder. “Now drink your tea! You’re going to be late.”
Aiden sulks.
**
“Aiden!” Matt yells. For a brief second Aiden thinks about pretending he didn’t hear him, but in the end he thinks he shouldn’t be that childish. He turns, a mask of indifference on his face.
“Yeah?”
“Um,” Matt said hesitantly, slowing down, “you okay?” He looks at Aiden, frowning.
“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”
Matt shuffles from foot to foot. “I don’t know. I tried to call you yesterday, but you didn’t pick up.”
It’s physically impossible for Aiden to look at Matt, so he looks away. A lone peacock is walking on the grass near by. “Yeah, about that.”
“What? Did something happen?” And Matt sounds worried, like he has no clue that he’s breaking Aiden’s heart.
“I don’t think we should spend so much time together. I mean. We're cool, right? We can be friends?”
After a moment, when Matt hasn’t said anything, Aiden turns to look at him. Matt looks stunned, like someone just slapped him.
He clears his throat. “Yeah, we are friends, Aid, if that’s what you want.” His voice sounds raw. “Anyway. Um. I just wanted to know if you were all right, which you clearly are, so, I better go. Work waits for no man and all that.” His smile seems forced and then he’s already walking away from Aiden.
“Yeah,” Aiden says. “Bye.”
**
“Who stole your stripes this morning?” Louis asks the next day, when they are sitting at the picnic tables eating lunch.
Aiden shrugs, not looking Louis in the eye.
“Seriously,” Louis says. “It’s like a fucking funeral here. Both you and Matt moping, and Niall staring at Harry like someone kicked a puppy.” He sniffs, exaggerated. “It shouldn’t be this depressing working in a zoo!”
“Ha ha,” Aiden says and takes a bite of his sandwich. He tries to pretend he isn’t aware of the fact that Louis is still staring at him.
“So, you don’t know anything about the fact that yesterday afternoon Matt came to the vets' looking like someone had stolen all the happiness from the world? Even the baby otters couldn’t make him smile. The vets were worried.”
Aiden stares at the lunch he's no longer inclined to eat. “No. No idea,” he says. “Listen, I have to go. I’m taking care of the snakes today, ‘cause Paije called in sick. But I’ll see ya, yeah?” He hurries away before Louis has a chance to ask him more questions.
**
He rubs at his eyes with the heels of his hands. He’s exhausted, hasn’t been sleeping well, and now that Paije is sick he has to put in a longer day at the zoo.
“Okay,” he says to the zebras, “I’m done.” But the zebras ignore him, like they're upset with him or something. Aiden sighs, walks away.
“Hey.” And of course it’s Matt. He waits for Aiden to come closer. His shoulders are high, defensive.
Aiden walks slowly towards him, his heart beating too fast in his chest. “Hey,” he manages in a shaky voice. He swallows.
“I think we should talk,” Matt says.
Aiden nods, doesn’t look Matt in the eye. “Yeah, okay.”
There’s an awkward pause. “Okay.” Aiden looks up, and Matt’s looking pained. He’s frowning, his mouth an unhappy line. “Just--- What’s up with you? You’re acting all weird suddenly.” He sighs. “I thought we were getting along?”
Aiden stares at the ground. “Nothing,” he says curtly.
Matt snorts. “Well it’s something. You've been distant and weird all week.” He’s quiet for a while. “Aid, did something happen? You have to tell me. I promise, I’ll---” And he sounds worried, and that's what finally breaks Aiden’s resolve.
He huffs. “Something did happen.”
Matt looks at him patiently, waiting. “I’m not a mind-reader, mate. You'll have to tell me a bit more.”
Aiden tucks his hands into his pockets. “I saw you, you know. With that girl.”
Matt looks uneasy. “What girl?”
Aiden actually stomps his foot. “The girl with the pretty long hair and the heels! Who even wears heels, it’s a fucking zoo!”
“You mean Jill?”
“Yes, I don’t know! The girl I saw you with!”
Matt shakes his head disbelievingly. “It was nothing! We're just friends!”
Aiden lifts his chin. “I saw the way you looked at her.”
“What? You have to be kidding me!” Matt is starting to sound mad, his mouth an angry line.
“And you let her keep her hand on your arm. She kept petting you!” Aiden bites his lip, but the anger is still bubbling inside him. He wants to yell; wants to shake Matt!
“Oh, fuck you,” Matt snarls and walks away. Aiden keeps staring at his back, but he’s too angry to follow. He takes a deep breath. He’s not going to cry, he tells himself. He’s stronger than that.
“I’m sorry,” an elderly lady asks him just as he’s ready to walk away from the scene, “could you please tell me where the flamingos are?” She smiles at Aiden, and there’s a sullen teenage boy standing a few feet behind her, trying to look like he’s not there with her.
“They are right after the gates, ma'am. So when you’re leaving, you can go and see them,” Aiden tells her, trying to make his voice not shake.
“Oh, and which direction are the gates, again? I’m dreadful with maps and directions, to be honest.” She rolls her eyes at herself. The boy behind her snorts and Aiden gives him a hard stare. “My husband used to say, 'give Agnes a map and you’ll find yourself in Spain.' That never happened though. Never left the Isles, myself.” She looks sad, and Aiden has the sudden urge to give her a hug. “You should never give up something you love,” she says. “Marty always said I was too good to him, but I think it was the other way around.” Her eyes crinkle behind her glasses, and she smiles up at Aiden again, waiting.
“Okay, the flamingos. If you turn around, you will find them. Just follow the signs to the exit,” he says, turns around and runs after Matt
**
“I’m sorry, okay! I’m sorry!” he practically yells when he finds Matt behind the staff room. Matt’s leaning against the wall, smoking.
Matt looks at him, dark eyes and red mouth. “Sorry about what?” he says, looking suspicious.
Aiden sighs. He kind of wants to hit himself in the head. “For acting like a total twat. And, being, you know, a jealous idiot.”
Matt takes a drag on his cigarette but keeps his eyes on Aiden. “You were jealous?”
Aiden scrunches up his nose, but says eventually, “yeah, I was jealous.”
There’s a small smile tugging at the corners of Matt’s mouth. “You know, you have no reason to be jealous of Jill. I’m actually crazy about you.” He shrugs a bit helplessly, looking awkward.
Aiden stares at Matt, mouth agape. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I was trying to be, you know, a gentleman. Aiden, I don’t want to push you into anything.”
And that’s it. Matt’s actually an idiot. Aiden rolls his eyes, and then he steps closer, pushes Matt against the wall, their chests touching, and kisses him. And then kisses him some more.
The kiss tastes of smoke, and it’s hot, the way Matt tilts his head up, his arm wrapping around Aiden’s waist, pulling him closer.
Eventually Aiden pulls away. They breathe together, chests heaving.
“Okay,” Matt says. “I get it. You’re done with me being a gentleman.”
Aiden grins, pushes a thigh between Matt’s. “Yeah,” he says, and bites at Matt’s lower lip.
Matt’s hand finds his and he laces their fingers together. He grins at Aiden and licks his lip. “Okay,” he says and shows Aiden just how ungentlemanly he can be. Aiden sort of loves it.
END
Zoo!AU, where everyone works in a zoo. In an imaginary zoo, I might add.
DISCLAIMER: Not real. I own nothing.
Matt/Aiden, (Liam/Louis), Pg-13, ~7,500 words.
A/N: For horopter. Ilu ♥ I hope you like it sweetie. Thank you so, so much comeoutcomeout for betaing. You’re amazing. ♥ All the remaining mistakes are mine.
**
The zebra looks at him sadly.
“I know,” Aiden sighs and kicks the ground. “But it’s not like I can just go to him and ask him out, you know?”
The zebra blinks, slowly, and turns his head, so the sole focus of his left eye is on Aiden.
“Because he would say no, that’s why!” Aiden says, frustrated.
The zebra snorts.
“Oh, you’re in an impossible mood today, aren’t you?”
The zebra just turns his head and smiles his zebra-tastic smile at Aiden, all yellow teeth and pink gums.
Aiden sighs. “Yeah, yeah. Tell the guys I’ll come and clean the water points later.” Aiden puts his lunchbox into his bag. “I need to go and see the birds. They’ve been eating and pooping all morning now. I’m pretty sure they can’t wait to see me.”
The zebra keeps looking at Aiden, but fails to come across sympathetic.
Aiden grins at him. “Good try, mate. I’ll see ya.” He walks around the fencing and through the gate to the public area. A woman with two small children smiles at him and Aiden gives them a small wave. It’s a beautiful day and there are a lot of people walking around, smiling and taking pictures.
He goes first to the staff room to put his backpack into his locker. There is a poster of a walrus with a heavy moustache and beard on the wall, and under the picture - in big red letters - it reads: “IN CUSTOMER SERVICE IT IS IMPORTANT TO TAKE CARE OF YOU LOOKS.” Someone has written under that that means you Storm: stop scaring the kids!! with a black sharpie.
Aiden leaves and makes sure the door is locked behind him. He takes one of the red staff bicycles to get to the Birdhouse faster. He goes past the Monkey Island and the Snake House, waves at the giraffes, and smiles at people he passes. He goes through the narrow gate and leaves the bike next to the other ones at the back of the enclosure.
It’s a madhouse inside as usual. The noise and humid air hit his face like a wall. It’s almost like stepping into another dimension.
“A jungle in the middle of England,” Aiden murmurs quietly in a low voice. “See a part of the Amazon for only fifteen pounds.”
One thing Aiden has learnt since starting work at the zoo is that when you have a hangover, you should avoid going inside the Birdhouse at all costs. You can get used to the general smell of the zoo, but noise is a bit different, and the birds are never, ever quiet. Sometimes it seems they’re trying to out-scream each other. They are talkative, always, regardless of the weather outside.
“Hello,” Aiden says to a vet who smiles at him while rushing past him. She has a cage with her, but it appears to be empty.
“Hi, Aiden,” she says, smiling.
Aiden feels that most of the birds have gotten used to him by now, and usually he hums quietly while working inside the cages. It calms the birds somewhat; they don’t seem so threatened. There is one loud-mouthed bright green parakeet with a very sharp beak who likes to come and sit on Aiden’s shoulder and insult him while he tries to work. “Idiot,” the parakeet says, or shrills in most cases, “idiot, idiot, idiot!” His other favourites upon seeing Aiden are “twat” and “arse”. Aiden has started to call him Louis, to Louis’ utter annoyance, after hearing the witty parakeet address the girls giggling outside the glass “hey baby”.
“One thing I don’t understand,” Aiden said to Louis, “is why it doesn’t call me ‘baby’.”
Louis snorted, pulled Aiden to his side and ruffled his hair. “It’s because the bird has a good taste in men. And aw, Aid, I didn’t know you were jealous!”
Aiden flipped Louis off, but that only made him laugh louder.
Aiden likes the birds, though. They are pretty and colourful, and most of the time the cacophony of noise would actually manage to lull him deep into his own thoughts.
When Aiden is finished with the cages, he looks around to see he hasn’t forgotten anything. There are a two teenage girls looking at him, and when he smiles at them, they turn hastily away, giggling. Aiden rolls his eyes; he is never going to understand girls.
He goes back outside and squints at the blue sky. He really needs a smoke.
Looking at his watch he realises he could still have a break before going to see the zebras for the last time. He jumps back onto his bike and manoeuvres through the gate which is always so much more complicated from that direction; it’s like the Birdhouse doesn’t want him to leave. Well, that or the gate hates him. “A personal vendetta against my awesome quiff,” he murmurs, speeding down a small hill.
“Hey Aid!”
Aiden looks around and stops. “Oh, hey Liam. What’s up?”
Liam shrugs. “Nothing much. It’s a busy day at the gates.”
Aiden hums. “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” Liam sighs, looks around him “It’s just so sad that for most of these kids this is going to be their only chance to experience wildlife.” He turns his sad eyes back to Aiden. “And all these animals, they have no idea what it is like to be truly free.”
Aiden clears his throat. “Yeah. At least they have shelter. And like, food.”
Liam sighs again, heavily.
Aiden resists the urge to pat Liam’s shoulder reassuringly. “I have to go, mate. But I’ll see you around, yeah?”
“Sure,” Liam says, managing to give a small smile to Aiden that has most of the girls at the gates buying season tickets.
They like to come every day and stare at Harry and Liam adoringly. Zayn kept saying the zoo should charge extra for that. “They could just put them behind glass and girls would come in droves to watch them.”
Louis looked dauntingly intrigued by the idea. “But what would they do in their cage all day, though?”
Zayn shrugged, not fussed. “I dunno. Watch TV. Play games. Whatever they wanted. It’s not like the girls would mind.”
“And I bet casual nakedness wouldn’t hurt either,” Louis said, leering.
But thus far the zoo hasn’t seized that spectacular business opportunity and Harry, Liam, Niall, Zayn and Louis all work at the ticket office. Cher says it’s sexist, the way there are no women working there, but she’s happy working in the gift shop herself. She gets to paint pictures of animals on children’s faces. She says she wants to become a makeup artist some day. “Open up my own salon or do makeup for fashion editorials,” she says, eyes big, her hair up in a big bun over her head. Some of the kids call it a bird nest, but never so that Cher would actually hear them say so.
Aiden leaves his bicycle in the back. The zebras have already been fed, so all Aiden has to do is to make sure the water points are clean.
He’s sweating when he’s done. “Okay guys,” he says to the zebras that are hanging around. “I’m all done. I’ll see you guys tomorrow.”
He goes to wash his hands. He can’t wait to get into a shower to wash all the dirt and muck away. He finds it astonishing how the dirt seems to get absorbed into his skin even through his clothes.
“Hey.”
Aiden jumps. “Oh, hey Matt. I didn’t see you.” Matt’s standing at the gate, his old hat on his head, gritty Jeans rolled up to his knees.
“Yeah,” Matt rubs the back of his neck. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you.” He pulls the cap lower like he wants to hide.
“You didn’t! I mean, um,“ Aiden clears his throat. “What’s up?”
There’s a small smile on Matt’s face that makes his eyes crinkle adoringly. “I was just back at the vets' and---“ He fidgets. “The twin Spectacled Bears are doing great. And, er. You really should go and see them before they grow to be mean man-eaters and lose their appeal to be petted.”
Aiden tilts his head, questioning. “I thought Spectacled Bears were vegetarian?”
Matt laughs. “Yeah, mostly. But they’re still a bit scary when they’re all grown up, you know.”
Aiden grins. “Well, yeah. But only because they look like they could still bite your head off.”
“So,” Matt says, looking around. “Are you all done for today?”
Aiden nods. “Yeah, I can’t wait to get home.” He rubs his wet hands absent-mindedly against his thighs.
“Yeah, you need a lift?”
“No,” Aiden bites his lip. “I mean, I have a car, so.”
“Oh.” Matt looks down at his shoes.
“But thanks, for, you know, asking.” Aiden can feel himself blushing and he looks away.
“That’s okay. If you ever need a lift, or you know, something, just ask, okay?”
“Yeah, sure mate. Thanks.”
Matt smiles at him then, warm and genuine. “Any time. Well, I better go. There’s some kind of problem with the elephants, so I have to see what that’s about.”
“Yeah, okay.”
He watches as Matt walks to his truck and gets in. He only realizes he’s still staring, when Matt grins at him through the car window and gives him a wave before driving away.
“Shit,” Aiden says and hastily looks away. “Fucking hell.”
There’s a sound that Aiden swears is the equivalent of zebra laughter.
“Oh, shut up,” he says before stomping away.
**
Aiden goes home. He drums his thumbs against the steering wheel in time with the music. “Hello!” he yells when he steps inside the house and goes up to his room.
He lies on his bed and stares at the white ceiling. “I’m missing something,” he says out loud, because he can’t shake the odd feeling. There’s a weird pressure on his chest.
He puts his headphones on and turns the music up so loud it’s almost impossible to think. He closes his eyes.
He wakes up two hours later feeling groggy. “Shit,” he says as he gets up and goes to the bathroom to have a wash. He looks at himself in the mirror. His hair is sticking out in every direction and his eyes are red. “Bloody Mr. England,” he grumps. “You could be a fucking supermodel, mate,” he tells himself before flicking the light out and going downstairs to get something to eat.
**
The next day, Louis is waiting for Aiden at the parking lot. “Morning, sunshine!” he yells, getting up from the curb. There’s an extra spring in his step.
Aiden glowers at him. “Why are so chipper?” he asks, suspicious.
Louis only shrugs. “Because it’s a fantastic morning! Also, I need your help.”
Aiden stares at Louis, but he only keeps looking back at him with puppy dog eyes. “What did you do?”
“Nothing!” Louis throws up his hands, trying to look innocent.
“If you’re in trouble again for prank calling someone you shouldn’t have, I want nothing to do with it.”
Louis looks annoyed. “It’s nothing like that. It’s um.” His nose crinkles in a way Aiden absolutely refuses to find adorable.
“What?”
“I want to make Liam smile more,” Louis says after a pause, looking determined.
Aiden blinks. “You want to make Liam smile?”
Louis fidgets. “Well, yeah. I mean, he’s such a sad panda all the time, and even the girls have started to give him worried glances. It can’t be good for business!”
“Uh, so you want to make Liam smile because it’s good for business?”
“Yes. No! I mean,” Louis sighs. “I just want to make him happy, okay? I don’t want him to quit because he hates it here.” Aiden’s pretty sure Louis actually blushes at that.
“Well, why don’t you ask him to do something he likes?”
Louis tilts his head. “Like what?”
Aiden groans. “I dunno. Ask him to see a film or something.”
“What, like a date?” But Louis looks more intrigued than panicked by the thought.
“Well, yeah? Or like, a man date. I don’t know!”
“Hmm, but I can’t just go and ask him out out of the blue!”
Aiden resists the urge to roll his eyes. It’s something he has to do a lot when dealing with Louis. “Sure you can. But maybe you need some time to think it over. We should get going though, or we’re both going to be late.”
“Yeah, I need a plan.” Louis grins and hits Aiden on the shoulder. “Thanks, mate.”
“You’re welcome?” Aiden says and thinks he should probably warn Liam. But on the other hand, he’s a little too curious to see the chaos that is about to happen.
**
In the afternoon, Matt comes to see Aiden again while he’s busy feeding the zebras.
“What? Did you look up my schedule?” Aiden asks without thinking it through, and watches in amusement as Matt blushes.
“Maybe,” Matt says, trying to look nonchalant. “So, are zebras like your favourite?”
Aiden shrugs, leaning on his pitchfork. “Maybe,” he says. “They are pretty amazing. I mean, they have stripes, they’re practically horses’ cool cousins.”
Matt laughs. “So, you like stripes, huh?”
Aiden grins, relaxing. “Yeah, I mean. Do you know what a stallion said to a zebra, when the zebra asked what it was that stallions did?”
Matt tilts his head, looking bemused. “What?”
Aiden leans closer to Matt and says in a deep voice: “Take off your pyjamas and I’ll show you.”
Matt blinks before his whole face is taken over by a huge smile. “Man, that was actually a pretty good one.”
Aiden bites his bottom lip, looks down at his shoes. “Yeah. I mean, I like zebras. I mean, they should look stupid, but they don’t. It’s pretty awesome.”
“Yeah, I got that,” Matt smiles. “Hey, if you’re free tomorrow, I have this gig. I mean it’s nothing fancy, just a small one in an old pub, but if you wanted, you could come? It’s just me and my friend Ali playing covers, but we’re pretty alright.”
Aiden blinks and Matt keeps looking somewhere over his right shoulder. “You play music?”
Matt looks him straight in the eye. “Yeah? I mean, I haven’t told you? I sing and play the guitar.”
“So, are you any good, or do your friends and family support you out of pity?” Aiden grins, trying to lighten up the mood.
Matt shrugs, a frown appearing onto his face. “Well, I used to thinks so but it’s fucking hard out there, you know? So I don’t know. But I love it.” He shrugs again, a bit helplessly.
“Oh,” Aiden says. “But tomorrow, right?”
“Yeah.”
“How late are you guys playing? I mean, I’m babysitting--- I mean,” but it’s too late, and Aiden can actually feel how red his face is turning.
Matt grins. “You’re babysitting? One job isn’t enough for you?
Aiden cringes, stares at Matt’s shoes. “Yeah, my mum is busy so I’m looking after my sister.”
“Oh,” Matt says. “That’s cool.”
Aiden looks up. “Yeah?”
“Yeah, we start probably at nine. It’s the pub at the bottom of the high street, The King’s Head? Think you can make it?”
“Sure.” And he smiles at Matt who returns the smile, and for a second he looks like he’s leaning closer, but then he blinks and takes a step back.
“Anyway, I’ll see you then. Take good care of those zebras!” He grins over his shoulder before walking away.
“Yeah!” Aiden yells after him, and instantly winces. ”Yeah?” he says to himself. “Jeez, could I be any cooler?” He snorts. ”Take off your pyjamas. Way to go, mate.”
The zebras just look lazily at him. He’s sure one of them is slowly shaking its head.
**
The next day doesn’t start well. He almost oversleeps and has no time to eat a real breakfast; only manages to grab an apple and eat it in the car on his way to the zoo. Only when he’s changing into his work clothes does he notice he had his shirt on backwards.
Nothing special happens at work. Some parents call because of Nicolo, their most popular tour guide, who had said something to a group of kids that resulted in them asking difficult questions to their parents.
“It’s not my fault if the animals don’t follow their parents’ high moral codes,” Nicolo says lounging in the office. “For fuck’s sake, they wanted them to learn about animals and all I told them were the facts. They could just find them on Wikipedia themselves.”
Aiden also tells the zebras about the gig Matt invited him to. “I mean, it’s not like it’s a date, right? But he did invite me, so that has to mean something, right?”
The zebras just keep eating, looking unconvinced.
“Yeah,” Aiden sighs. “I didn’t even know he sings, you know? Why is he so cool? I’m sure he thinks I’m just some idiot kid.” He frowns unhappily at the ground. “Maybe I shouldn’t even go. It’s not like I’m going to know anyone there anyway.” He hangs his head in defeat. “I’m such a loser,” he mumbles.
The zebras give a collective sigh.
**
“Okay, I’m home!” his mum yells as soon as she has opened the door. Aiden rushes to the front door.
“You’re late!” he accuses, snatching his car keys from the table.
Joanna just rolls her eyes. “Yeah, well, Mrs Collins had a lot to say.” She reaches to touch his hair, but at the last second Aiden manages to dodge.
“Mum! he says and checks in the mirror that his hair is still looking fine. Because his mum is evil, she just grins.
“Have fun, dear. And don’t bring anyone back I wouldn’t approve of.”
“Mum! Stop it. You’re not as cool as you like to think you are.”
“Sure I am,” she says.
His mum is actually looking a bit misty-eyed, so he relents and gives her a hug. “Bye, mum,” he says.
“Have fun, and drive safely! And don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!”
**
But because there is no god, Aiden finds himself standing on the side of the road, his car’s hood popped open. He stares at the engine, miserable.
“Not now, Sylv. Please!” But it’s no use. It’s not like Aiden can make the smoke disappear. He’s not a magician.
He sniffs, but it’s only because it’s a bit chilly outside.
He looks around, cars driving past him. He gives up and calls a garage.
**
“Ah, stop moping. You have savings, don’t you?” his mum says, giving him a cup of tea.
“Yeah,” he sighs. He was actually saving so he could move out, but that’s a touchy subject with his mum.
“Or you could always buy a new car? I don’t like the idea of your car breaking down and leaving you stranded somewhere in the middle of the night.”
Aiden pouts at his tea. “How am I going to get to work now?”
“Well,” she says after a pause, “I think you have heard of these things called buses? They drive people around. You could always consider that.”
“Ha ha,” he says. “You’re hilarious.”
“Well I like to think so,” she says. “Go on, have a biscuit. You’ll feel better.”
Aiden relents and takes one. He hates to admit it, but his mum is right and it does make him feel better. Then he looks at the time and sighs heavily again. Matt’s going to hate him; he’s going to think Aiden didn’t want to come, when it was all his stupid car’s fault. He doesn’t even have Matt’s number, and he realises it’s now unlikely he’ll ever have it, because Matt’s going to hate him!
“Chin up, it’s going to be a new day tomorrow!” Joanna says cheerily. “You can always try to meditate on the bus, or you know, read a book. You might even find it refreshing.”
**
It is a new day tomorrow. Aiden has to wake up a lot earlier so he can catch the right bus. He’s sleepy and moody, and goes to sit at the back of the bus and listens to his iPod. There’s gum on the back of the seat in front of him and he stares at it disgusted.
He’s a bit early when he gets to the zoo, so he walks slowly towards the employee entrance.
“Hey! Aid, wait up!”
Aiden turns, but it’s only Louis running up to him across the parking lot.
“Hey,” Aiden says when Louis catches up with him.
“Hey man, what’s up?”
Aiden shrugs. “Car broke down.”
“Aw, that sucks!” Louis tries to look sorry, but he’s practically vibrating with energy. “So, guess what?”
“What?” Aiden says, uses his keys to open the gate.
“I asked Liam out yesterday, and he said yes!”
Aiden is actually surprised Louis acted on his advice. Well, that and a bit jealous. “You did?”
“Yeah, it was epic, man. I sent him this text, right? So I wrote, why do pandas like old films? and after a moment, I sent because they are black and white! Get it?” Louis actually laughs at his own joke.
“Yeah,” Aiden laughs because Louis’ good mood is actually catching. “That was pretty clever of you.”
“Well, Liam sent me back haha very funny, but then I sent him, so, wanna go? And he said sure!” Louis is smiling so wide it must be hurting his cheeks.
“Well done,” Aiden says. “Okay, lets change, or we are both going to be late. Again.”
“But you think Liam likes me, right?” Louis asks. “He wouldn’t have said yes otherwise?”
Aiden sighs. “Yeah, I think Liam’s crazy about you. Now shut up.”
**
Aiden manages to avoid meeting Matt. That, or - he realises with a sinking heart - Matt is avoiding him. But he doesn’t want to think about option number two, because that only makes his chest hurt, and he doesn’t like that one bit.
Aiden stares at the zebras morosely. “I don’t know why I keep talking to you. I mean, I know if I painted a wall with black and white stripes you guys would go and hang around in front of it.” He wipes his nose onto his sleeve. “It’s not like I’m one of you. I don’t have stripes.”
It seems that for once he has the zebras’ undivided attention. “It’s not like you’re going to miss me when I’m gone.”
He finishes his work in silence, and by the time he’s done it has started to rain. He goes to take all the tools back to the shed, and then gives the zebras - who are now huddling together in the rain - one last look before walking away.
**
Because it’s just his luck, the bus is pulling away when he steps out of the gate. “Shit,” he says, and because he can feel water dripping down his neck and under his shirt, there’s no point in running. It’s impossible for him to get any wetter.
He jumps over a puddle, barely managing not to trip over his own feet. He goes to look at the timetable when he finally reaches the bus stop. He looks at his watch. “Fifteen minutes?” He groans. “You’ve got to be kidding me!”
He starts to shiver. He’s actually only starting to feel cold now that he’s out of the rain. That doesn’t make any sense, he thinks, and checks the time again. He decides to walk to the next stop, just to make him feel a bit warmer.
The bus driver gives him a disapproving look when he steps inside. His teeth are chattering and he’s miserable in his wet clothes.
He actually runs home when he gets off the bus, because he can’t wait to get out of his wet clothes.
“Oh,” his mum says by way of a greeting. “Well, take a hot shower. Dinner should be ready by then anyway. And put your wet clothes somewhere to dry!”
**
Aiden wakes up slowly the next morning, and it feels like his head is trying to kill him. His throat hurts, and even thinking about moving is too much effort.
“Mum,” he croaks. “Mum!”
“What is it?” His mum comes in. “Oh,” and she comes to sit on the bed, her hand feels cold against his forehead. “Sweetie, you have a high fever.” She runs her hand through his sweaty hair. “You have to call work and tell them you can’t come today. I’ll go to the pharmacy later.”
Aiden just closes his eyes and breathes against his pillow. He wants to sleep forever.
**
Aiden sleeps through the day. In the evening his mum brings him some soup and he manages to eat that. Then he watches some TV before he passes out again.
Next day he’s feeling a bit better. He drinks a lot of tea and orange juice. He watches Ghostbusters and some random videos from YouTube that amuse him.
He’s lying on his bed, has his earphones on, when his mum’s head pops in. “Aiden?” she says, eyes twinkling.
He takes out the earphones. “What?”
“There’s someone here to see you?”
Aiden sits up. “To see me? But why---“
And it’s Matt. Of course it’s Matt, because the universe hates Aiden and it doesn’t care that Aiden is looking like shit, that he’s wearing his rattiest t-shirt, and that his hair is greasy and disgusting.
“Oh, hi,” Aiden says in a small voice, that no matter what someone might say isn’t a squawk.
“Hey.” Matt looks uncomfortable. “You okay, man? I mean---“
“Yeah, yeah. Just a flu. That’s what you get, running around in the rain, and, um.”
Matt tilts his head. “Why were you running around in the rain?”
Aiden tugs at the covers. “Well, I missed the bus, and since I already was soaked, I thought, what the hell, and walked to the next stop.”
Matt looks bemused. “But I thought you had a car?”
“Well,” Aiden swallows. “It broke? And man, I was seriously coming to see your gig, honest, but my car broke down, and I didn’t have your number, so I couldn’t call you. And then I felt bad for, you know, not coming, and I thought---“
Matt interrupts him. “Hey, hey, it’s okay. Seriously. Just, give me your phone and I’ll give you my number so next time you can let me know.”
“Uh, sure.” Aiden tries not to fidget while he watches Matt typing his number into his phone.
“I’m’ma call myself so I’ll have yours too.” Matt waits until his own phone rings once. “There.” He hands Aiden his phone back.
“Thanks.” Aiden doesn’t know where to look. He feels like a bloody Victorian heroine, lying on his bed like this, pale and sickly. “Wait, how did you even know where I lived?”
Matt blinks, twice, before looking guiltily away. “Louis might have told me. He, er, might have also told me to come and see you.”
“Oh, Louis did, did he?” He’s going to kick Louis’ arse. As soon as he has his strength back, that is.
“Yeah,” Matt looks around his room. “Nice room by the way. Cool posters. Hey, you play the guitar?”
Aiden tries to hide his blush by staring at his lap. “Some. I’m not very good at it. But I’m learning!”
“Hey, we should totally jam together some time. That would be amazing!” Matt sounds genuinely excited, so Aiden looks up and Matt’s looking at him, smiling.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah, definitely.” Matt nods, and only then seems to notice the laptop on Aiden’s lap. “Oh, did I interrupt or something?”
“No, no, I was just watching these videos on YouTube. There’s this one guy, who can like play every instrument ever invented, and he’s uploaded all these songs. He’s amazing.”
“Really?” Matt comes and perches on the bed next to Aiden. “Can I see?”
“Sure,” and so he finds himself watching videos with Matt and talking about music, until he starts to yawn.
“Oh, hey, sorry. You should have said something.” Matt says, getting up. He reaches for the covers so he could tuck Aiden in, but Aiden stops him, wraps his fingers around Matt’s wrist.
“No, no! It’s okay. Maybe I’m not that well yet. But I’ll be back at work in a day or two, though.”
“Yeah,” Matt says in a quiet voice.
Aiden’s throat feels dry. “So I’ll see you then?”
“Sure.” And Matt gives him his warmest smile that makes his eyes crinkle. Only then does Aiden realise he’s still holding Matt’s wrist, and he lets go quickly. He feels the flush climbing all the way to his ears.
“Um.”
“Well,” Matt takes a couple steps towards the door, “you take care, yeah? Also, the zebras miss you. I tried to tell them you were coming back, but I’m pretty sure they didn’t understand me.”
Aiden smiles, pleased. “Yeah, okay. Thanks for coming by.”
Matt gives him one fond look before disappearing through the door that closes with a soft click.
Aiden stares at it, like the door is just going to disappear and prove everything only happened inside Aiden’s feverish brain. But the door remains where it is, and he can hear his mum and Matt talking downstairs, and then the front door opening and closing.
Aiden lies back down, closes his eyes. “My life is actually insane,” he tells the empty room.
**
Aiden’s back at work. He had gotten one text from Matt the day before - hope u r feeling better . . . :) XX - that had made Aiden grin like an idiot the rest of the day. His mum had smiled at him knowingly, but even that couldn’t deflate his mood. Because Matt actually texted him!
Aiden had responded, something inane, after which he hadn’t heard from Matt. Aiden had picked his phone up a couple of times, but he didn’t want to appear too interested, in case Matt just wanted to be his friend. So he hadn’t sent him another text. He kept thinking he should have sent Matt something cleverer, though.
“He thinks I’m an idiot,” he says to himself.
“Who thinks you’re an idiot?” Niall asks.
“Uh, no one?”
Niall looks at him, amused. “O-kay. Matt was looking for you, by the way.”
Aiden perks up. “He was?”
Niall smirks. “Yeah. Anyway, I gotta go, I left Zayn and Harry alone in the ticket office and that’s never good.”
Aiden walks a bit faster. The zebras look delighted to see him. “Hey guys,” Aiden says. “I actually missed your stupid faces.”
A zebra neighs in response and Aiden grins so wide his cheeks hurt.
**
They happen to have their lunch break at the same time. They sit at the picnic tables outside the staff house. There are birds singing in the trees around them and the sun feels warm on their skin.
“So,” Aiden asks, “how long have you been working here?”
Matt licks his fingers clean, and even though it’s kinda gross, it’s also surprisingly hot. “I started a little over a year ago. Before that I did all kinds of shitty jobs, but I like it here. The animals are amazing, even though sometimes I get a bit tired of smelling of dung and sweat.” He smirks.
“You don’t smell that bad,” Aiden says before he can stop himself. “Um.”
“Well thanks,” Matt says, grinning. He finishes his sandwiches and digs out his smokes. “Want one?” He offers the pack to Aiden, who takes one. Matt reached over the table to light Aiden’s cigarette, and his fingers accidentally brush against Aiden’s cheek.
“Thanks,” Aiden manages, a bit breathless, watching as Matt lights his own cigarette and takes a long drag. Aiden realises he’s staring at Matt’s mouth, so he looks away.
They sit in a comfortable silence. “We should go and eat sushi some day,” Matt says after a while. “There’s this new Japanese restaurant, we should check it out. Have you ever eaten sushi? I fucking love sushi.” His eyes are focused on Aiden as he takes one last drag before stabbing his cigarette in the ceramic ashtray on the table.
Aiden blinks. “Sure,” he says. “That would be cool.”
“Yeah?” Matt sounds pleased. “Cool.” He looks at his watch. “Shit, I have to go. I have to drive to the airport to get a packet from Customs. The zoo ordered some new toys for the seals.”
“Okay, I’ll see you?” Aiden says and winces when it comes out like a question.
“You bet,” Matt says, and smiles his tad askew smile before hurrying away.
**
“So,” Louis says, “how are you two lovebirds doing?”
Aiden frowns. “What? Who?”
Louis actually rolls his eyes. “You and Matt, you twat!” He blinks, before a wide grin breaks across his face. “Hey, that actually rhymes! Maybe I should become a poet! Matt the twat who, um, spat? Hey, do you know if Matt swallows or---“
“No! Don’t say it!” Aiden puts his hand over Louis mouth. He only removes his hand when Louis licks his palm. “Ew,” he grimaces. “You don’t know where my hand has been!”
Louis leers and Aiden hits him onto his shoulder. “Not that! But this is a fucking zoo! You could get, like, fucking salmonella or something!”
“Aw, you worry too much. I’ve all my vaccinations in order.” He frowns. “At least I think I do.”
“You’re impossible,” Aiden says. “I don’t know how Liam puts up with you.”
Louis quirks his eyebrows. “There are perks to hanging out with me. First of all, I’m very flexible; secondly, I’m very imaginative, and ---“
“Oh god, just shut up!” Aiden says and covers his ears. “I don’t want to know about your sex life!”
“Aw, mate,” Louis says, wrapping an arm around Aiden’s shoulders. “Am I hurting your sensibilities? Oh, look, isn’t that Matt?”
Aiden turns to look, and yes, it is Matt. It’s Matt with some woman. Aiden frowns at them.
“Who is she?” Louis asks. “Dang, she’s hot!”
Aiden watches as the woman laughs, her head tilting back, her hand resting on Matt’s arm. Matt grins; he looks happy that he managed to make the woman laugh.
“I have to go,” Aiden says. He turns around so he doesn’t have to look at Matt with that woman. “I’ll see you,” he says to Louis before practically running away.
**
Aiden is not avoiding Matt, regardless what the zebras think. “You should have seen her!” Aiden vents, viciously poking the hay bale with his pitchfork. “She was all over him! And he did nothing! Just stood there like a, like a---” he looks around him. “Like a sloth! Like he didn’t have two fine legs so he could walk away!” He pauses, stares down sullenly. “And Louis is right. She was hot.” He almost spits the last bit out like the words are poisonous.
The zebras all hang their heads, sad.
Aiden sighs. “I know. My own fault for thinking there was something between us, huh?”
When he gets back to his locker at the end of the day, there are three missed calls from Matt. Aiden stares at his phone for a while before ignoring them. He just wants to go home and hide from the world. And eat biscuits. And possibly listen to Damian Rice.
**
Matt sends him a text later that night. what’s up?? didnt see u today. u okay?
Aiden hits delete as fast as he can. After a while Matt tries to call him but he ignores it. Matt also sends him another text, ?? :(, but after that he doesn’t try to contact him again.
Aiden feels restless. He also feels like he wants to cry, but he’s not going to. Instead he goes outside to smoke a cigarette or two.
He stands in the back garden and thinks. He thinks about Matt, about his easy smile and the warmth of his voice. Aiden doesn’t understand why he is so mesmerized by him; Matt’s just a regular guy. Who just happens to know a lot about music and who Aiden maybe wants to snog. Aiden sighs. He can still hear the sounds of the street from here, but it’s quieter, calmer. “I don’t have a crush on Matt,” he tries. He takes one last drag before stomping the cigarette-butt into the ground and goes back inside.
Because he knows the truth, and the truth is, he’s fucked.
**
“What’s up, princess?” his mum asks the next morning when Aiden sits at the kitchen table and sips moodily at his tea.
Aiden sighs. “I don’t really feel like going to work today, that’s all.”
His mum frowns. “Are you getting sick again?” She touches his cheek, his forehead. “Your skin doesn’t feel hot.”
Aiden turns his head away. “It’s not that,” he says.
His mum is quiet for a while. “Well, if you’re not sick, you should get to work. That’s how it is. Welcome to adulthood.” She claps him onto his shoulder. “Now drink your tea! You’re going to be late.”
Aiden sulks.
**
“Aiden!” Matt yells. For a brief second Aiden thinks about pretending he didn’t hear him, but in the end he thinks he shouldn’t be that childish. He turns, a mask of indifference on his face.
“Yeah?”
“Um,” Matt said hesitantly, slowing down, “you okay?” He looks at Aiden, frowning.
“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”
Matt shuffles from foot to foot. “I don’t know. I tried to call you yesterday, but you didn’t pick up.”
It’s physically impossible for Aiden to look at Matt, so he looks away. A lone peacock is walking on the grass near by. “Yeah, about that.”
“What? Did something happen?” And Matt sounds worried, like he has no clue that he’s breaking Aiden’s heart.
“I don’t think we should spend so much time together. I mean. We're cool, right? We can be friends?”
After a moment, when Matt hasn’t said anything, Aiden turns to look at him. Matt looks stunned, like someone just slapped him.
He clears his throat. “Yeah, we are friends, Aid, if that’s what you want.” His voice sounds raw. “Anyway. Um. I just wanted to know if you were all right, which you clearly are, so, I better go. Work waits for no man and all that.” His smile seems forced and then he’s already walking away from Aiden.
“Yeah,” Aiden says. “Bye.”
**
“Who stole your stripes this morning?” Louis asks the next day, when they are sitting at the picnic tables eating lunch.
Aiden shrugs, not looking Louis in the eye.
“Seriously,” Louis says. “It’s like a fucking funeral here. Both you and Matt moping, and Niall staring at Harry like someone kicked a puppy.” He sniffs, exaggerated. “It shouldn’t be this depressing working in a zoo!”
“Ha ha,” Aiden says and takes a bite of his sandwich. He tries to pretend he isn’t aware of the fact that Louis is still staring at him.
“So, you don’t know anything about the fact that yesterday afternoon Matt came to the vets' looking like someone had stolen all the happiness from the world? Even the baby otters couldn’t make him smile. The vets were worried.”
Aiden stares at the lunch he's no longer inclined to eat. “No. No idea,” he says. “Listen, I have to go. I’m taking care of the snakes today, ‘cause Paije called in sick. But I’ll see ya, yeah?” He hurries away before Louis has a chance to ask him more questions.
**
He rubs at his eyes with the heels of his hands. He’s exhausted, hasn’t been sleeping well, and now that Paije is sick he has to put in a longer day at the zoo.
“Okay,” he says to the zebras, “I’m done.” But the zebras ignore him, like they're upset with him or something. Aiden sighs, walks away.
“Hey.” And of course it’s Matt. He waits for Aiden to come closer. His shoulders are high, defensive.
Aiden walks slowly towards him, his heart beating too fast in his chest. “Hey,” he manages in a shaky voice. He swallows.
“I think we should talk,” Matt says.
Aiden nods, doesn’t look Matt in the eye. “Yeah, okay.”
There’s an awkward pause. “Okay.” Aiden looks up, and Matt’s looking pained. He’s frowning, his mouth an unhappy line. “Just--- What’s up with you? You’re acting all weird suddenly.” He sighs. “I thought we were getting along?”
Aiden stares at the ground. “Nothing,” he says curtly.
Matt snorts. “Well it’s something. You've been distant and weird all week.” He’s quiet for a while. “Aid, did something happen? You have to tell me. I promise, I’ll---” And he sounds worried, and that's what finally breaks Aiden’s resolve.
He huffs. “Something did happen.”
Matt looks at him patiently, waiting. “I’m not a mind-reader, mate. You'll have to tell me a bit more.”
Aiden tucks his hands into his pockets. “I saw you, you know. With that girl.”
Matt looks uneasy. “What girl?”
Aiden actually stomps his foot. “The girl with the pretty long hair and the heels! Who even wears heels, it’s a fucking zoo!”
“You mean Jill?”
“Yes, I don’t know! The girl I saw you with!”
Matt shakes his head disbelievingly. “It was nothing! We're just friends!”
Aiden lifts his chin. “I saw the way you looked at her.”
“What? You have to be kidding me!” Matt is starting to sound mad, his mouth an angry line.
“And you let her keep her hand on your arm. She kept petting you!” Aiden bites his lip, but the anger is still bubbling inside him. He wants to yell; wants to shake Matt!
“Oh, fuck you,” Matt snarls and walks away. Aiden keeps staring at his back, but he’s too angry to follow. He takes a deep breath. He’s not going to cry, he tells himself. He’s stronger than that.
“I’m sorry,” an elderly lady asks him just as he’s ready to walk away from the scene, “could you please tell me where the flamingos are?” She smiles at Aiden, and there’s a sullen teenage boy standing a few feet behind her, trying to look like he’s not there with her.
“They are right after the gates, ma'am. So when you’re leaving, you can go and see them,” Aiden tells her, trying to make his voice not shake.
“Oh, and which direction are the gates, again? I’m dreadful with maps and directions, to be honest.” She rolls her eyes at herself. The boy behind her snorts and Aiden gives him a hard stare. “My husband used to say, 'give Agnes a map and you’ll find yourself in Spain.' That never happened though. Never left the Isles, myself.” She looks sad, and Aiden has the sudden urge to give her a hug. “You should never give up something you love,” she says. “Marty always said I was too good to him, but I think it was the other way around.” Her eyes crinkle behind her glasses, and she smiles up at Aiden again, waiting.
“Okay, the flamingos. If you turn around, you will find them. Just follow the signs to the exit,” he says, turns around and runs after Matt
**
“I’m sorry, okay! I’m sorry!” he practically yells when he finds Matt behind the staff room. Matt’s leaning against the wall, smoking.
Matt looks at him, dark eyes and red mouth. “Sorry about what?” he says, looking suspicious.
Aiden sighs. He kind of wants to hit himself in the head. “For acting like a total twat. And, being, you know, a jealous idiot.”
Matt takes a drag on his cigarette but keeps his eyes on Aiden. “You were jealous?”
Aiden scrunches up his nose, but says eventually, “yeah, I was jealous.”
There’s a small smile tugging at the corners of Matt’s mouth. “You know, you have no reason to be jealous of Jill. I’m actually crazy about you.” He shrugs a bit helplessly, looking awkward.
Aiden stares at Matt, mouth agape. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I was trying to be, you know, a gentleman. Aiden, I don’t want to push you into anything.”
And that’s it. Matt’s actually an idiot. Aiden rolls his eyes, and then he steps closer, pushes Matt against the wall, their chests touching, and kisses him. And then kisses him some more.
The kiss tastes of smoke, and it’s hot, the way Matt tilts his head up, his arm wrapping around Aiden’s waist, pulling him closer.
Eventually Aiden pulls away. They breathe together, chests heaving.
“Okay,” Matt says. “I get it. You’re done with me being a gentleman.”
Aiden grins, pushes a thigh between Matt’s. “Yeah,” he says, and bites at Matt’s lower lip.
Matt’s hand finds his and he laces their fingers together. He grins at Aiden and licks his lip. “Okay,” he says and shows Aiden just how ungentlemanly he can be. Aiden sort of loves it.
END