i dont even know what to put here.

[savetheelephant]

So its been awhile since i wrote im here. Me and dustin broke up a little after two months (surprised? didnt think so) && since then Ive been OK i guess. We decided we're "dating" again but the circumstances we're under doesnt make that so easy. About a week ago i got caught sneaking out to see him and my parents found out he spent the "nightt" over. (it was only a few hours, & it was unintenional, it was like 3 in the morning and we fell asleep) So my dad forbids me to see him, which i dont think is fair. So what? dustin made a mistake. My parents have gone the past two years thinking Dustin was an angel and when it was proven he wasnt they freak out and tell me i cant see him anymore?!! Its not fair. I think its safe to say (even though i dont like admitting it) that i fell in love with him. So of course yesterday he ended up coming to my school to see me during my break between softball and school. I ended up being late to softball, so at the end of practice i had to run poles. My mom asked young why i had to run. So young said " she was late coming beack with dustin." ISnt that just fucking dandy. I really didnt get introuble, they just reinforced the idea that I'm not going to see dustin anymore. I miss him so much. I dont know what to do. I dont want to move on, but i feel like i have to. I either want all or nothing, because just having phone conversations just makes everything hurt worse, even though i feel like shit when i dont talk to him. I dont know what to fucking do. Input please.

-sarah