on marriage &c.
I've been feeling particularly anti-establishment today. So I thought I'd take a minute to vomit out some thoughts on the marriage thing, and what the hell I think I'm going to be doing on August 11.
I have no interest in the concept of Marriage as an institution. My good feminist predecessors have been over this; it's all about ownership. Historically speaking, absolutely, but yes, it really still is. When people I have nothing but love and respect for phrase their wedding invitations like a "transfer of property notice," something is wrong.
And it's especially about ownership of female bodies and sexuality. For the most part, husbands cannot be held legally responsible for raping their wives; her body is his property. I thought we had all gotten over that idea, but my dear sweet ex showed me differently. ...his "apology" was: "I guess I just thought you owed me sex because you were my girlfriend."
So pardon me if I don't let you call me "girlfriend" or "wife." My self and my body are not yours to rape at will.
With all this illustrious history, is it any wonder I'm not totally behind the fight for same-sex marriage? I'm sorry, why are we fighting for "chattel slavery"? [I mean, yes, obviously, same-sex couples should have an equal right to make that choice if they want to. But for that matter, shouldn't I be able to designate whomever I want with my power of attorney if I'm sick?]
Then what do I think Jesse and I are doing? Short answer: having a picnic and saying cute things to one another. Longer answer: figuring out a way to celebrate our commitment to each other in the context of our community(ies) and create a relatively-stable, not-necessarily-monogamous, radically-genderfuct mutual relationship. that will singlehandedly overthrow the patriarchy and dismantle the institution of marriage as we know it!! okay, maybe not that.
but at least we can dream.
I have no interest in the concept of Marriage as an institution. My good feminist predecessors have been over this; it's all about ownership. Historically speaking, absolutely, but yes, it really still is. When people I have nothing but love and respect for phrase their wedding invitations like a "transfer of property notice," something is wrong.
And it's especially about ownership of female bodies and sexuality. For the most part, husbands cannot be held legally responsible for raping their wives; her body is his property. I thought we had all gotten over that idea, but my dear sweet ex showed me differently. ...his "apology" was: "I guess I just thought you owed me sex because you were my girlfriend."
So pardon me if I don't let you call me "girlfriend" or "wife." My self and my body are not yours to rape at will.
With all this illustrious history, is it any wonder I'm not totally behind the fight for same-sex marriage? I'm sorry, why are we fighting for "chattel slavery"? [I mean, yes, obviously, same-sex couples should have an equal right to make that choice if they want to. But for that matter, shouldn't I be able to designate whomever I want with my power of attorney if I'm sick?]
Then what do I think Jesse and I are doing? Short answer: having a picnic and saying cute things to one another. Longer answer: figuring out a way to celebrate our commitment to each other in the context of our community(ies) and create a relatively-stable, not-necessarily-monogamous, radically-genderfuct mutual relationship. that will singlehandedly overthrow the patriarchy and dismantle the institution of marriage as we know it!! okay, maybe not that.
but at least we can dream.