Times are getting rough.
Yesterday Scott called to tell me that he was going to have to work full-time and go to school full-time next year. Trying to give him a wake up call, I told him that was going to be really tough. He then replied with "I'll just study on the weekends." That set me off. First off all, I haven't made it this far by just "studying on the weekends." I have worked my ass off, and if he ever plans on getting a freaking college degree, he needs to know that it will take more than just wishing, hoping and a little weekend reading. He told me I was preaching and that he has two mom's and doesn't need another one to give him a lecture. I then told him that I am probably one of the only people in his life who actually gives a damn about his future. The way I see it, every decision that he makes affects my futures also. I then reminded him that if we were to get married after graduation that I would do my best to help him through. I know for sure that after college I will be making a pretty good salaray, therefore helping him by paying for books, the rent and food so that all he has to worry about is his insurance, gas and cell and he can concentrate on school. He took offense to that, which really upset me. As far as I can tell, I am the only one who seems to give a damn about his future, so when I offered my help he stated very beligerantly "I will make this on my own, and I don't fucking need anyone else's help." It is then that I realized, why am I worrying about this man who obviously doesn't realize that it doesn't have to be as hard as he makes it out to be. It could be easier, and I would be willing to make it easier for him. With my whole heart I would be willing. But his pride and Ego get in the way, that just pisses me off to no end. geez.
AFter the yelling match, we hung up, and I went to my sorority sister's wedding rehearsal and bachelorette party. Before we went to the bachelorette party at the hotel, I called scott to apologize for yelling, but not for what I said. He apologized for yelling too. But I knew it wasn't over, because he let me off the phone without telling me he loved me. Before we hung up he said that he and his roomies were going to 'City Bar' in Lafayette. It's this really trendy bar that a lot of college kids go to--he told me he would call me when he got home to let me know he had gotten there safely--(our ritual. When we go out we always do this so the other one doesn't worry as much). Well, he didn't call. And when I called him to see what was up, he didn't pick up. So I sent a text message and called again. Guess what. His phone was off this time.
So tired as hell, I fall asleep. This morning I woke up and called him again. He picked up, just as cheery as can be, and when I asked him why he didn't call, he said his phone was at home. I said, well why didn't you call when you got home then. His answer: "I didn't feel like it." When asked why: "I told you yesterday, I have two mommas. I dont need a third." So after telling him what a cocky, insulent, irresponsible, immature prick he was being I hung up on him.
I went to the wedding. Cried every time I saw regina and Bryant happy and kissing and thinking "That will never be me and scott if this shit keep happening."
It's 8: 15 p.m. and still no call. I refuse to call him first. I did nothing wrong.
AFter the yelling match, we hung up, and I went to my sorority sister's wedding rehearsal and bachelorette party. Before we went to the bachelorette party at the hotel, I called scott to apologize for yelling, but not for what I said. He apologized for yelling too. But I knew it wasn't over, because he let me off the phone without telling me he loved me. Before we hung up he said that he and his roomies were going to 'City Bar' in Lafayette. It's this really trendy bar that a lot of college kids go to--he told me he would call me when he got home to let me know he had gotten there safely--(our ritual. When we go out we always do this so the other one doesn't worry as much). Well, he didn't call. And when I called him to see what was up, he didn't pick up. So I sent a text message and called again. Guess what. His phone was off this time.
So tired as hell, I fall asleep. This morning I woke up and called him again. He picked up, just as cheery as can be, and when I asked him why he didn't call, he said his phone was at home. I said, well why didn't you call when you got home then. His answer: "I didn't feel like it." When asked why: "I told you yesterday, I have two mommas. I dont need a third." So after telling him what a cocky, insulent, irresponsible, immature prick he was being I hung up on him.
I went to the wedding. Cried every time I saw regina and Bryant happy and kissing and thinking "That will never be me and scott if this shit keep happening."
It's 8: 15 p.m. and still no call. I refuse to call him first. I did nothing wrong.