It's been hard...
I have so much I wanted to write in here...but it seems that now that I am here, in front of my computer, I cannot put anything into words. The past few days have been very hard. I realize today, more than ever, that I cannot keep this up. I have not been keeping up the progress and the change that I have been so proud of within myself, and that is not ok with me. I liked who I was growing into, and I am going to get that person back again. Change is not easy, and sometimes you fall back into old ways, but I cannot let myself go back there, not after how much I have grown and been able to see just how great it is to be the me that I know I can be.
The bigger picture is that I have the most wonderful fiancee in the entire world, who will be living up here with me in August, and I miss her like hell, but having her love in my life is all I ever want. And I have a job that may be boring, but it's paying good money and allowing me to save up so much this summer, to start my life off right. And I get to spend more time with my family and be less stressed with my living situation. And I have the greatest fam I could ever ask for...and she knows how great she is too! I have a lot going for me...god, how could I ever forget that???
And baby, I am sorry for all I have put you through. You're an angel.
The bigger picture is that I have the most wonderful fiancee in the entire world, who will be living up here with me in August, and I miss her like hell, but having her love in my life is all I ever want. And I have a job that may be boring, but it's paying good money and allowing me to save up so much this summer, to start my life off right. And I get to spend more time with my family and be less stressed with my living situation. And I have the greatest fam I could ever ask for...and she knows how great she is too! I have a lot going for me...god, how could I ever forget that???
And baby, I am sorry for all I have put you through. You're an angel.