the countdown begins
I may start rambling, right now I can't think straight. My guts are churning and my chest hurts. I keep walking back and forth from the kitchen to the bedroom to the bathroom....there's his shaving cream and aftershave, his clothes from yesterday on the bedroom floor, last night's reciept from Outback, his drink glass from this morning on the table, his drawing pencils scattered on my bookshelf, the note he surreptitiously left on the pillow right before we left this morning...and a thousand other small things but the house is so empty without him here. Yet I know it hasn't REALLY set in yet.
Paul just left for Iraq 7 hours ago and I do not know how I will cope for the next seven months. At least we had a year together after we were married before he had to leave. It is too horrible to think about and I will try to supress it, but it's there in the farthest corner....I am terrified of something happening to him ......I will most likely have Mylanta for breakfast and lunch from now on because no matter how much he reassured me I'm still scared to death.
I am going to miss him dreadfully. We have been together over 4 years now and I still cannot believe how lucky I am.
I'm so depressed and I don't know how I will sleep without him here for so long. I just want to put on some of his clothes and burrow in the sheets that smell like Tide and faintly of his aftershave and stay for several days.
Last night and this morning were difficult. Watching the clock and the minutes ticking by knowing that he would be leaving soon....
Monday I must put on a happy face and go teach Kindergarten. I put off my lessons plans all week so I could spend time with him after work and now the last thing I want to do is think about them, much less prepare them.
I had to leave before the busses came because I felt that my throat was going to explode from all the pressure of trying not to cry. I know he's taking it as badly as I am and a small part of me wants to say "I told you so." But I won't. Regardless of how I felt about him joining the military I am proud of him for doing it.
The hard part is not knowing when I will hear from him. As well as keeping it together in front of Elise.
Paul just left for Iraq 7 hours ago and I do not know how I will cope for the next seven months. At least we had a year together after we were married before he had to leave. It is too horrible to think about and I will try to supress it, but it's there in the farthest corner....I am terrified of something happening to him ......I will most likely have Mylanta for breakfast and lunch from now on because no matter how much he reassured me I'm still scared to death.
I am going to miss him dreadfully. We have been together over 4 years now and I still cannot believe how lucky I am.
I'm so depressed and I don't know how I will sleep without him here for so long. I just want to put on some of his clothes and burrow in the sheets that smell like Tide and faintly of his aftershave and stay for several days.
Last night and this morning were difficult. Watching the clock and the minutes ticking by knowing that he would be leaving soon....
Monday I must put on a happy face and go teach Kindergarten. I put off my lessons plans all week so I could spend time with him after work and now the last thing I want to do is think about them, much less prepare them.
I had to leave before the busses came because I felt that my throat was going to explode from all the pressure of trying not to cry. I know he's taking it as badly as I am and a small part of me wants to say "I told you so." But I won't. Regardless of how I felt about him joining the military I am proud of him for doing it.
The hard part is not knowing when I will hear from him. As well as keeping it together in front of Elise.