twins!
no I'm not having twins. i just feel like i'm having to take care of two kids. err, will be. I have to do everything for josh. cook, clean up after him, tell him the time, deress him, do his laundry, keep him on track with work and finding a job after he quits his job and waking him up at a decent time so he doesn't sleep all day.
It's getting annoying and i don't know what to do about it. i don't want to just confront him about it because it's not like he asks me to do it. but i have to, he doesn't do it. I've waited on him to do his own laundry and he wears everything he has and jsut waits for me to wash his clothes. I've tried to let him wake himself up but he ended up sleeping til 7pm. I've kept my mouth shut about calling a potential employer back but he will never remember to until it's too late.
Everytime we fight he asks me if I'm happy being with him and I always say yes without giving it a thought. I don't let myself think about it. in the past it was because i knew that most of the time i was happy, i loved him with all my heart, and i couldn't imagine being without him. Now I don't think about it because i'm afraid to find out that maybe i'm not happy anymore. That we fight more than we have a relationship and i've cried more because of him then i have at the thought of losing him.
I'm not sure about anything in our relationship but i do know that i still love him. And as difficult as our relationship is we do have good times. whether it's more rare now then in the beginning i'm not sure.
Lately I've been dreaming a lot. and everytime it's about josh leaving me, or josh kissing some girl in front of me or chosing another girl over me. It's obvious that all that means is subconsously i am afriad josh will leave me and run of with some other girl. But i want to get over all of that. i don't know how or where to begin to work on this but i feel that if i do then maybe we could have a better relationship and maybe i'll find more love in myself that i can give to him.
It's getting annoying and i don't know what to do about it. i don't want to just confront him about it because it's not like he asks me to do it. but i have to, he doesn't do it. I've waited on him to do his own laundry and he wears everything he has and jsut waits for me to wash his clothes. I've tried to let him wake himself up but he ended up sleeping til 7pm. I've kept my mouth shut about calling a potential employer back but he will never remember to until it's too late.
Everytime we fight he asks me if I'm happy being with him and I always say yes without giving it a thought. I don't let myself think about it. in the past it was because i knew that most of the time i was happy, i loved him with all my heart, and i couldn't imagine being without him. Now I don't think about it because i'm afraid to find out that maybe i'm not happy anymore. That we fight more than we have a relationship and i've cried more because of him then i have at the thought of losing him.
I'm not sure about anything in our relationship but i do know that i still love him. And as difficult as our relationship is we do have good times. whether it's more rare now then in the beginning i'm not sure.
Lately I've been dreaming a lot. and everytime it's about josh leaving me, or josh kissing some girl in front of me or chosing another girl over me. It's obvious that all that means is subconsously i am afriad josh will leave me and run of with some other girl. But i want to get over all of that. i don't know how or where to begin to work on this but i feel that if i do then maybe we could have a better relationship and maybe i'll find more love in myself that i can give to him.