I've beat them
Once upon a time not long ago the only thing that would get me out of bed in the mornings was the knowledge that my red-tailed hawks would be there on the lightposts along the way to work, promising me something better to come. I hated where I lived so badly that, if I didn't have the hawks to focus on, I could literally feel my mood sinking with every mile closer to home I got. A trip to the store was a rattling experience of pessimism and misanthropy, and at night I would sigh myself to sleep, hoping for the song of a lonely mockingbird to keep me company all night.
We've moved again and I've finally found a place that is home in more than name only. We're up on top of a hill, a house among a narrow ribbon of others that snakes through the wild chaparral. Coyotes cross behind our backyard at night - skunks and raccoons come after dark to steal any unclaimed peanuts Marie leaves out for the scrub-jays every morning. Deer sometimes cross the street in the mornings, leaving their heart-shaped prints on the sidewalk.
And the hawks...
The same hawks I used to need, to crane my neck to catch a single glimpse of simply to give myself the energy to smile - they perch a mere 15 feet away in a pine tree. At any time of the day I can look out the living room window and see one or more, circling the sky or standing sentinel from a tree branch.
I'm home. Finally, finally, finally.
And it's all symbolic of my life as a whole. I'm getting married in 2 months and can't be happier. My job is going better than I'd ever have expected. I'm healthy, happier than I've ever been, and now I'm home.
We've moved again and I've finally found a place that is home in more than name only. We're up on top of a hill, a house among a narrow ribbon of others that snakes through the wild chaparral. Coyotes cross behind our backyard at night - skunks and raccoons come after dark to steal any unclaimed peanuts Marie leaves out for the scrub-jays every morning. Deer sometimes cross the street in the mornings, leaving their heart-shaped prints on the sidewalk.
And the hawks...
The same hawks I used to need, to crane my neck to catch a single glimpse of simply to give myself the energy to smile - they perch a mere 15 feet away in a pine tree. At any time of the day I can look out the living room window and see one or more, circling the sky or standing sentinel from a tree branch.
I'm home. Finally, finally, finally.
And it's all symbolic of my life as a whole. I'm getting married in 2 months and can't be happier. My job is going better than I'd ever have expected. I'm healthy, happier than I've ever been, and now I'm home.