(no subject)
If I have some time I'd like to stay here a while and flesh out some thoughts. But I don't... and neither do I really want to think about them. If there were internet connection back at my stupid apartment I would've spewed out a few pages of self-loathing, generally spiteful words... but thanks to my landlady's indifference to her tenants' needs, the bile is mostly still swimmig somewhere behind my throat. I had a hard time making up my mind as to what stance I'd be willing to -- or be able to -- take, but in the end I left the decision-making to the way things naturally flow. Whether I'll choose to be mature or be sentimental about it, I'm putting it off to the next time I'm pushed towards the edge. For now, I'll be a little mute, and a little dead. And I'll keep telling myself that we'll both grow up some day. Eventually.