Tony Kilpatrick and the Half-Way Kiss
So, I'm workin' on a Monday right and it's pretty busy for a Monday and I mean, geez, I had 3 goddamn tables. Thank you oh Bone Fish Highness for bestowing your...ah...mercy upon me. So, anyway, the night, goes on, yaddey yaddey yaddah and around 8, I spot Ava and Amanda. Probably the 2 nicest girls in Bone Fish and of course, if you've been
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Scenario 1: doesn't need top be explained.
Little Mafer gets his mail from ASU and he runs inside the house to read it to his family of 5 trillion people on the loudest microphone ever.
Elem: Well guys... here's my ledda fum ASU. Hea it go. (Begins to read letter)
Elem: (ASU letter) Dea Elem Fage, (smiles and points to himself like that Fag girl amanda whos name doens't desrve to be capitalized. Continues to read with excitement and quickly) You have been excepted to ASU... halfway? (started the sentence like a comment and ended like it was a question. he is no longer reading to everybody in his family, but he reads aloud to himself.) We have seended yow tramscrps and we cudnint come to da conclushin if we shud hav you at owa schoowa. So we took a vote annnnnnnnnnd.... we decided to half way admit you to ASU. I really dont know why we are repeating this in da ledda but thats the kinda shit we need to do. We felt sorry for you. Please have some simpathy for us having sympathy for you. smiles? Know wadim sayin... So we hope that you aren't reading this out loud to anybody cuz this might be kinda embarassing. umm... good luck we guess and holla back if you accept. (then they get cocky with a lil snicker at the end) well it's not like you got an offer anywhere else. hehe. just kidding Elem. good luck with you hard decision. no signature needed.
END STORY and NO CREDITS CAUSE I DONT DESRVE IIIT! ROCK ROCK ROCK ROCK!
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