Another Bone Fish Production: Today's Topic: Girls and their physicalities
Girls: Situation 1: "Please tell me that big butts are still the thing"
Ashley: Oh my GOODDD. I ran track today and I hurt all OVERRR!
Tony: All over *sarcastic tone sets in* That so?
Ashley: Ya! ALLLL my muscles hurt. Even my ASS hurts!
Tony: You're ass isn't a muscle.
Ashley: I know that! But it still hurts! My big ass really hurts!
Tony: Oh...ummm...I'm sorry
Ashley: Look at it! *points to her ass as if it's perfectly okay for me to stare at it and not look like a pervert in the process*
Tony: Uhhhhhh...I'm sure it hurts...I believe you *immediately rushes like a squirrel over to the cup station to get a small swig of Sprite*
Ashley: Tonyyy...do you think I have a big ass?
Tony: *thinking 'OH FUCCCKKK'* What?!
Ashley: Do YOU think I HAVE a big ass? *innocent look on her face. She's definitely expecting a certain type of answer from Tony here*
Tony: Why would you think that?
Ashley: Well this guy the other day said I have a Badonkadonk and I mean I guess he was right...I dunno...*shrugs*
Tony: *thinking. 'You guess?'* What's wrong with havin' a big ass?
Ashley: *Eyes grow to the size of Huge tea saucers only meant for Paul Bunyan's hands* So YOU DOOOO think I have a big ass!!!
Tony: *thinking: FUCK! Tony quick! Think! Think! THINK FUCKER!* Ummm...It's like a plump, firm...uh...ass...It's nice...
Ashley: But you still think it's big?
Tony: *thinking: How the hell did I get into ONE OF THESE??* *sigggghhh*
Ashley: *has that expectant 'Wellll I'm waiting for an answeerrr' look on her face*
Tony: *sigggghhh* Ashley you know what?
Ashley: What?
Tony: I'm an assologist and on a scale of 1-10, your ass tops the charts. Nothin' wrong with a girl with a behind. Gotta nice dirty south appeal to it and that's how I think all women should have it.
Ashley: Ahhhhhh...thanks!! *gives Tony a huge hug*
Tony: *sigghhh*
Girls: Situation 2: "Uhhhh Excuse Me. This is NOT the color I wanted"
Tony: Amanda what's wrong?
Amanda: *eyes are downcast, corner of her mouth is pulled slightly downard and her usual aura of niceness has faded somewhat* *she says nothin' just mutters*
Tony: You cool Amanda
Amanda: Yaaaaaaaaa *draws out her reply with that little kid who has just lost his dog in a car wreck voice*
Tony: That doesn't sound so alright to me.
Amanda: *shrugs*
Tony: *thinking: OKAYYYYYYY! This is gonna take a lot longer that I thought* What's wrong Amanda? *as if by repeating the question in a more higher pitched tone I'll get a better response! YEA!!*
Amanda: *mutters* Nothin'
Tony: *Shit. That WAS better* Nothin'? You sure? Cuz you kinda' have that the whole world is drowning in shit look on your face.
Amanda: *manages to crack that signature smile*
Tony: So tell me what's on your mind darlin'
Amanda: Welll...there's a lot. I mean I'm tired for one and I'm kinda' bored and my hair looks horrible and the lady got it wrong and-...*Amanda sighs and looks at me expectantly*
Tony: *thinking: Wow...girls...what a life* Your HAIR!? YOUR HAIR!? Amanda I think you look beautiful with your hair. I mean it really brings out your complexion and oh damn...you look damn good. *Yes I am a complexionologist seeing as how there are no other jobs to look for*
Amanda: *corners of her mouth turn upward into a slight smile as she rumages a quick hand through her now brownish black and blonde hair* Yeaaaa...but I mean I just don't like it
Tony: Well I'm sorry that the lady got it wrong but...I mean I THINK you look gorgeous. Really...I mean...you're gorgeous anyway but I like that style you have right now.
Amanda: *smiles even more* Ahhhh you're so sweet. *sighs* Well, thanks Tony. You're so awesome....Op...just got sat...*rubs my hands*...be right back!
Tony: *thinking: Wow...I hope I have girls when I get married. That didn't seem too bad!*
Ashley: Oh my GOODDD. I ran track today and I hurt all OVERRR!
Tony: All over *sarcastic tone sets in* That so?
Ashley: Ya! ALLLL my muscles hurt. Even my ASS hurts!
Tony: You're ass isn't a muscle.
Ashley: I know that! But it still hurts! My big ass really hurts!
Tony: Oh...ummm...I'm sorry
Ashley: Look at it! *points to her ass as if it's perfectly okay for me to stare at it and not look like a pervert in the process*
Tony: Uhhhhhh...I'm sure it hurts...I believe you *immediately rushes like a squirrel over to the cup station to get a small swig of Sprite*
Ashley: Tonyyy...do you think I have a big ass?
Tony: *thinking 'OH FUCCCKKK'* What?!
Ashley: Do YOU think I HAVE a big ass? *innocent look on her face. She's definitely expecting a certain type of answer from Tony here*
Tony: Why would you think that?
Ashley: Well this guy the other day said I have a Badonkadonk and I mean I guess he was right...I dunno...*shrugs*
Tony: *thinking. 'You guess?'* What's wrong with havin' a big ass?
Ashley: *Eyes grow to the size of Huge tea saucers only meant for Paul Bunyan's hands* So YOU DOOOO think I have a big ass!!!
Tony: *thinking: FUCK! Tony quick! Think! Think! THINK FUCKER!* Ummm...It's like a plump, firm...uh...ass...It's nice...
Ashley: But you still think it's big?
Tony: *thinking: How the hell did I get into ONE OF THESE??* *sigggghhh*
Ashley: *has that expectant 'Wellll I'm waiting for an answeerrr' look on her face*
Tony: *sigggghhh* Ashley you know what?
Ashley: What?
Tony: I'm an assologist and on a scale of 1-10, your ass tops the charts. Nothin' wrong with a girl with a behind. Gotta nice dirty south appeal to it and that's how I think all women should have it.
Ashley: Ahhhhhh...thanks!! *gives Tony a huge hug*
Tony: *sigghhh*
Girls: Situation 2: "Uhhhh Excuse Me. This is NOT the color I wanted"
Tony: Amanda what's wrong?
Amanda: *eyes are downcast, corner of her mouth is pulled slightly downard and her usual aura of niceness has faded somewhat* *she says nothin' just mutters*
Tony: You cool Amanda
Amanda: Yaaaaaaaaa *draws out her reply with that little kid who has just lost his dog in a car wreck voice*
Tony: That doesn't sound so alright to me.
Amanda: *shrugs*
Tony: *thinking: OKAYYYYYYY! This is gonna take a lot longer that I thought* What's wrong Amanda? *as if by repeating the question in a more higher pitched tone I'll get a better response! YEA!!*
Amanda: *mutters* Nothin'
Tony: *Shit. That WAS better* Nothin'? You sure? Cuz you kinda' have that the whole world is drowning in shit look on your face.
Amanda: *manages to crack that signature smile*
Tony: So tell me what's on your mind darlin'
Amanda: Welll...there's a lot. I mean I'm tired for one and I'm kinda' bored and my hair looks horrible and the lady got it wrong and-...*Amanda sighs and looks at me expectantly*
Tony: *thinking: Wow...girls...what a life* Your HAIR!? YOUR HAIR!? Amanda I think you look beautiful with your hair. I mean it really brings out your complexion and oh damn...you look damn good. *Yes I am a complexionologist seeing as how there are no other jobs to look for*
Amanda: *corners of her mouth turn upward into a slight smile as she rumages a quick hand through her now brownish black and blonde hair* Yeaaaa...but I mean I just don't like it
Tony: Well I'm sorry that the lady got it wrong but...I mean I THINK you look gorgeous. Really...I mean...you're gorgeous anyway but I like that style you have right now.
Amanda: *smiles even more* Ahhhh you're so sweet. *sighs* Well, thanks Tony. You're so awesome....Op...just got sat...*rubs my hands*...be right back!
Tony: *thinking: Wow...I hope I have girls when I get married. That didn't seem too bad!*