(no subject)
ok so I'm not calling her. oh well. anywhoo. yeah the happiness and good feeling I had 3 hours ago is now pretty much completely gone. I can't stand being in this apartment alone. I'm so used to having him here, to having a warm body next to me at night, to knowing that I could count on him to be here for me. and now I feel lost. and I'm really trying not to. Maybe I should give up completely and sell everything and move back in with my mom and get a stupid useless minimum wage job and just admit defeat. But I don't want to. I want to be happy like I was 2 weeks ago.I want to be able to remember what that felt like. I want to not cry every day because I'm hurting so much.