pits in my stomach
Ya know...
My friends dying is really starting to wear on me. I can't stand feeling guilty, and helpless, and as if I am one of the worst friends ever.
It's like, "If I just would have called her...", "I should have done everything that I knew of to help," "I just should have told her that I missed her, i loved her, I needed her..."
...and now I can't say any of that to her face.
I hate this feeling. I just want to scream at the top of my lungs so she can hear me and come back down.
fuck.
I think I felt another chunk of my heart shatter.
im pissed off...hurt...depressed.
My friends dying is really starting to wear on me. I can't stand feeling guilty, and helpless, and as if I am one of the worst friends ever.
It's like, "If I just would have called her...", "I should have done everything that I knew of to help," "I just should have told her that I missed her, i loved her, I needed her..."
...and now I can't say any of that to her face.
I hate this feeling. I just want to scream at the top of my lungs so she can hear me and come back down.
fuck.
I think I felt another chunk of my heart shatter.
im pissed off...hurt...depressed.