Random Quotes
Okay. Because Trace and I keep meaning to save chats to post here, and we're crap at it and because it's Thanksgiving and I've had quite a bit of wine, I've pulled out my quote book (Good old Quotey) to post quotes from our senior year in Boston. So here we go:
While Making Hashbrowns (Sometime in the Dead Like Me months)
Cara: I think we have enough onions.
Trace: I like a lot of onions.
Cara: Me too, but we have enough.
Trace: We need more.
Cara: No we don't. They're like a spice, not a base. If we had more onions than potatoes they wouldn't be hashbrowns, they'd be something-else-browns.
Trace: But I like a 2:1 ratio!
Cara: It IS a 2:1 ratio!
Trace: Then the onions aren't a SPICE.
Cara: They're a fucking COMPLIMENT. Point is, we don't need anymore goddamn onions.
Trace: God. It's like we're married.
Cara: It's like we're my GRANDPARENTS.
While Sitting on the Kitchen Floor (Which...could be any night, ever. Possibly a Thursday)
Cara: I hate that. I always remember things when I'm about to sleep and then say "I'll do it in the morning." Then I forget.
Trace: Me too. And it's always important stuff.
Cara: Yeah, like "I was going to take that guy to the guillotine."
Trace: Or "Did I check my bank account to see if I have enough money to buy something."
Cara: Something like a guillotine.
Trace: Well, exactly.
Cara: So you can guillotine that guy. And by "that guy" I mean "Chevy Chase." Wait. Is he dead? No, no. He's alive. Good for him.
While Watching 'Reefer Madness,' That Wonderful Movie Musical (Fall)
Trace: And I can ask him for an autographed copy. And maybe Kristen Bell's autograph. On a picture of her. So you can kiss it.
Cara: Oh, shut up. At least my girlcrush is a celebrity. Yours is the Starbucks girl.
While Riding the Bus, Which We Should Never Do, As We Always Get Lost (Winter)
Trace: Man, I bet I can kick you in the face from here.
Cara: No way!
Trace: Yeah huh!
Cara: Try it! Do it! This won't end well!
While Biff Was Doing Something Obnoxious (...so difficult to say)
Cara: We could make her a funnel to put around her neck.
Trace: But she'll think she lost her legs and just loll about, using gravity and the slopey floor to get around the apartment. Because she doesn't know things are there when she can't see them.
Cara: Yeah. We should really save that for a Thursday.
After We Drank An Entire Bottle of Gin and Did Not Even Get Tipsy (Spring)
Trace: I think our gin is broken.
Cara: I know!
Trace: Now we have a disappointed owl AND a misunderstood platypus. Oh! And the dinawockie jabasaur!
Trace: Why do our fantastic ideas always come down to us needing googly eyes?
Trace: This movie has everything! Bestiality, pedophilia, incest, Jesus, cheetahs...
While We Were at the Pour House Smiling at Those Guys ForEVER (Spring)
Trace: Maybe if you lick your lips...
Cara: I am NOT licking my lips. I already smiled at them three times and my hair looks the best it's ever looked. There's nothing more I can do here.
Trace: Your hair does look really good.
Cara: Right?
While Suspecting Trace Was, In Fact, an Evil Clone (Winter?)
Trace: To have a pre-show beer or not to have a pre-show beer. That is the question.
Cara: We both know the answer to this question.
Trace: Heh...heh heh
Cara: In fact, the answer is SO obvious that the fact you asked it makes me wonder if you've been replaced by a pod person who HATES BEER
After Hanging Out With Guys We Met On the Street and Not Getting Stabbed (Spring, sometime)
Trace: I told Anik that and he was like "Way to go. It's a miracle you weren't killed." And I was like "We THOUGHT we were going to the Sevens. But then we...just kept going to their apartment."
Cara: Serial killers don't have gorgeous apartments on Pinckney Street.
Trace: I know! It was really green though.
Cara: ...The guest bedroom was bigger than our apartment, the dining room was one huge bay window and you're bitching about the paint? The flowers, maybe.
Trace: Yeah! What was with that? Who keeps vases of flowers around when their girlfriend lives in San Francisco?
Cara: And the pussy willows in the bathroom!
Trace: I know!
While Making Hashbrowns (Sometime in the Dead Like Me months)
Cara: I think we have enough onions.
Trace: I like a lot of onions.
Cara: Me too, but we have enough.
Trace: We need more.
Cara: No we don't. They're like a spice, not a base. If we had more onions than potatoes they wouldn't be hashbrowns, they'd be something-else-browns.
Trace: But I like a 2:1 ratio!
Cara: It IS a 2:1 ratio!
Trace: Then the onions aren't a SPICE.
Cara: They're a fucking COMPLIMENT. Point is, we don't need anymore goddamn onions.
Trace: God. It's like we're married.
Cara: It's like we're my GRANDPARENTS.
While Sitting on the Kitchen Floor (Which...could be any night, ever. Possibly a Thursday)
Cara: I hate that. I always remember things when I'm about to sleep and then say "I'll do it in the morning." Then I forget.
Trace: Me too. And it's always important stuff.
Cara: Yeah, like "I was going to take that guy to the guillotine."
Trace: Or "Did I check my bank account to see if I have enough money to buy something."
Cara: Something like a guillotine.
Trace: Well, exactly.
Cara: So you can guillotine that guy. And by "that guy" I mean "Chevy Chase." Wait. Is he dead? No, no. He's alive. Good for him.
While Watching 'Reefer Madness,' That Wonderful Movie Musical (Fall)
Trace: And I can ask him for an autographed copy. And maybe Kristen Bell's autograph. On a picture of her. So you can kiss it.
Cara: Oh, shut up. At least my girlcrush is a celebrity. Yours is the Starbucks girl.
While Riding the Bus, Which We Should Never Do, As We Always Get Lost (Winter)
Trace: Man, I bet I can kick you in the face from here.
Cara: No way!
Trace: Yeah huh!
Cara: Try it! Do it! This won't end well!
While Biff Was Doing Something Obnoxious (...so difficult to say)
Cara: We could make her a funnel to put around her neck.
Trace: But she'll think she lost her legs and just loll about, using gravity and the slopey floor to get around the apartment. Because she doesn't know things are there when she can't see them.
Cara: Yeah. We should really save that for a Thursday.
After We Drank An Entire Bottle of Gin and Did Not Even Get Tipsy (Spring)
Trace: I think our gin is broken.
Cara: I know!
Trace: Now we have a disappointed owl AND a misunderstood platypus. Oh! And the dinawockie jabasaur!
Trace: Why do our fantastic ideas always come down to us needing googly eyes?
Trace: This movie has everything! Bestiality, pedophilia, incest, Jesus, cheetahs...
While We Were at the Pour House Smiling at Those Guys ForEVER (Spring)
Trace: Maybe if you lick your lips...
Cara: I am NOT licking my lips. I already smiled at them three times and my hair looks the best it's ever looked. There's nothing more I can do here.
Trace: Your hair does look really good.
Cara: Right?
While Suspecting Trace Was, In Fact, an Evil Clone (Winter?)
Trace: To have a pre-show beer or not to have a pre-show beer. That is the question.
Cara: We both know the answer to this question.
Trace: Heh...heh heh
Cara: In fact, the answer is SO obvious that the fact you asked it makes me wonder if you've been replaced by a pod person who HATES BEER
After Hanging Out With Guys We Met On the Street and Not Getting Stabbed (Spring, sometime)
Trace: I told Anik that and he was like "Way to go. It's a miracle you weren't killed." And I was like "We THOUGHT we were going to the Sevens. But then we...just kept going to their apartment."
Cara: Serial killers don't have gorgeous apartments on Pinckney Street.
Trace: I know! It was really green though.
Cara: ...The guest bedroom was bigger than our apartment, the dining room was one huge bay window and you're bitching about the paint? The flowers, maybe.
Trace: Yeah! What was with that? Who keeps vases of flowers around when their girlfriend lives in San Francisco?
Cara: And the pussy willows in the bathroom!
Trace: I know!