Squirrels taking over the world (aka. oh the things my mind comes up with when deprived of sleep)
The day had started off as usual, the alarm burped at me and i hit the snooze button a few times until i could face the concept commonly known as "awake". Of course by then I was running late so a mad dash round the flat to grab a quick cuppa and get a clean shirt on and then dash off out. It was then that i met the squirrel.
Now normally the sight of a squirrel wouldnt unsettle me, but this one had an aura about it that sugessed evil was afoot. Maybe it was the glint in it's eyes, maybe it was the way it cocked it's head to one side, or maybe it was the small hovertank with lazer gatling gun that gave it away. Of course this made for a rather more exciting walk to work than I'd anticipated. It turns out that the grey squirrels are the actual "greys" made so popular in alien abduction stories. For years they've been abducting people so they can work out how to take over the planet (they found that wiping out the red squirrels was just so much fun they wanted more).
So work today has been a complete nightmare, casualties have been flooding in, the hospital is overflowing with the wounded, anyone who can do even the smallest bit of first aid has been drafted in to help. It's hell here I tell you.
That and we've just run out of coffee. Rumour has it that the squirrels have taken control of the supply lines and have it all. So I'm currently trying to fashion a squirrel costume out of bedsheets and trying to work out how to speak squirrel. the way i see it I'd be the largest squirrel they've ever seen, they'd proclaim me their king and then I could have some fun! (and some coffee).
Now normally the sight of a squirrel wouldnt unsettle me, but this one had an aura about it that sugessed evil was afoot. Maybe it was the glint in it's eyes, maybe it was the way it cocked it's head to one side, or maybe it was the small hovertank with lazer gatling gun that gave it away. Of course this made for a rather more exciting walk to work than I'd anticipated. It turns out that the grey squirrels are the actual "greys" made so popular in alien abduction stories. For years they've been abducting people so they can work out how to take over the planet (they found that wiping out the red squirrels was just so much fun they wanted more).
So work today has been a complete nightmare, casualties have been flooding in, the hospital is overflowing with the wounded, anyone who can do even the smallest bit of first aid has been drafted in to help. It's hell here I tell you.
That and we've just run out of coffee. Rumour has it that the squirrels have taken control of the supply lines and have it all. So I'm currently trying to fashion a squirrel costume out of bedsheets and trying to work out how to speak squirrel. the way i see it I'd be the largest squirrel they've ever seen, they'd proclaim me their king and then I could have some fun! (and some coffee).