Jul 18, 2005 00:45
so now i can finally fuckin post.......
i went out of town 2 weeks ago with my mom.....we had so much fun...we got drunk and went running down the beach......i thought everything was finally ok
that is until we got home and found the kitty that danny and i picked out when i was fifteen dead........life is so unfair ...i mean Lars was only 10 (ps before i get hate mail, he was lars after lars frederiksen from rancid-NOT lars from metallica)
we cant explain what happened to him .....he was just laying in front of mom's rocking chair. the vet said that it wasnt poison or dehydration, or anything obvious...he thought it might have been a heartattack
i think i hurt more for my mom than me, i left lars with her because i didnt want her to be all alone when i moved out so for like 10 years its been just her and kitty....it was real scary to see her holding the cat and crying...i guess some people just cant handle that sort of thing......now when i talk to her she is so different ..like maybe she blames me for what happened and its so not fair that we had had the best weekend we had in a long time...sigh.........or maybe i just feel guilty.....