dredge
I'm having the weird, emotional day.
I woke up by my alarm, but I really did not want to get out of bed. It was raining outside and the sky was overcast, which gives everything an other-worldly, bluish glow. I really love laying in bed when the whole universe is awash in various shades of blue. I had to get up. I had to take on the day. I didn't feel defeated, I just felt like I wanted to not go out. I feel that way often, but I have duties that have to be done that should have been done with a while ago.
I get out of bed and I discover there is no brewed coffee. Fantastic. I prepare my breakfast anyway, and knock out my required typed summary of "an event" in my past for my speech class. That was nice. I left the house.
I get on the bus and take my seat. I wasn't paying attention to the other passengers, so I don't know if the two retarded people got on with me, or after me. One individual obviously had Down's Syndrome. I don't know what ailed the other guy, but he obviously had some sort of mental disability that made him really socially awkward. They must have know each other because they were talking like they knew each other. I'm assuming they both go to the DSC near Parkland College. I've seen them both before, but separately, on the bus.
Anyway, during the bus ride while I was on, the socially inept guy would go through sessions of hitting and slapping the other guy with Down's Syndrome. The other guy was getting visibly upset. He would ball his fist and tell his assailant to stop. He didn't stop. Andy, the guy who as getting hit, was trying to defend himself from this other guy, who's name I didn't catch, who's name I don't want to catch. As the bus ride progressed, the abuse became worse. My bus ride wasn't even at the halfway point when Socially Inept guy gets a bus schedule, folded it up, and hit Andy on the head. I had enough.
By now the bus has a large number of passengers, but none of them are doing anything to stop the abuse. I was furious that I had to be the one to stop it because it isn't my job to reign-in mentally disabled people when the get out of line. So, I leaned over, pointed at him and yelled at him to sit down, keep his hands to himself, and look forward. He did immediately. I yelled pretty loud at this guy who was adjacent to me, but I fear the Korean kid sitting in front of me caught most of my volume. A minute later he got up again, I'm assuming to adjust his sitting position, and I yelled at him again to sit down and look forward. I was still pissed.
This guy, and Andy, didn't interact for the rest of the ride while I was on the bus. I wouldn't have allowed that, anyway. I know the reason why I felt so weird throughout the day after that incident. The same shit would happen to me whenever I rode the bus to school when I was little. I had whole legions of people hitting me, punching me, spitting on me, dumping soda on me, and calling me names, and seeing one abuser hurt a helpless person just dredged up all these feelings from my past I don't want to deal with now or later.
Dealing with these old feelings makes me ask The Universe where was my guardian angel? Very rarely did anyone ever stick up for me, or defend me during the abuse. I would have killed to have someone to rely on whenever groups of people got the idea it would be funny to hurt me in any way they could think of, which invariably happened since I had absolutely no friends in school near the end. After I told that guy to stop hitting Andy and sit down, Andy looked at me quizzically, I think. I don't know. After I made that scene on the bus I just wanted to be alone again. I really wish people would leave each other the fuck alone. I don't want to see people hitting other people, and I sure as hell don't want to make a scene in a public place to correct the misdeeds of people who don't know any better, or who don't care.
∅
I woke up by my alarm, but I really did not want to get out of bed. It was raining outside and the sky was overcast, which gives everything an other-worldly, bluish glow. I really love laying in bed when the whole universe is awash in various shades of blue. I had to get up. I had to take on the day. I didn't feel defeated, I just felt like I wanted to not go out. I feel that way often, but I have duties that have to be done that should have been done with a while ago.
I get out of bed and I discover there is no brewed coffee. Fantastic. I prepare my breakfast anyway, and knock out my required typed summary of "an event" in my past for my speech class. That was nice. I left the house.
I get on the bus and take my seat. I wasn't paying attention to the other passengers, so I don't know if the two retarded people got on with me, or after me. One individual obviously had Down's Syndrome. I don't know what ailed the other guy, but he obviously had some sort of mental disability that made him really socially awkward. They must have know each other because they were talking like they knew each other. I'm assuming they both go to the DSC near Parkland College. I've seen them both before, but separately, on the bus.
Anyway, during the bus ride while I was on, the socially inept guy would go through sessions of hitting and slapping the other guy with Down's Syndrome. The other guy was getting visibly upset. He would ball his fist and tell his assailant to stop. He didn't stop. Andy, the guy who as getting hit, was trying to defend himself from this other guy, who's name I didn't catch, who's name I don't want to catch. As the bus ride progressed, the abuse became worse. My bus ride wasn't even at the halfway point when Socially Inept guy gets a bus schedule, folded it up, and hit Andy on the head. I had enough.
By now the bus has a large number of passengers, but none of them are doing anything to stop the abuse. I was furious that I had to be the one to stop it because it isn't my job to reign-in mentally disabled people when the get out of line. So, I leaned over, pointed at him and yelled at him to sit down, keep his hands to himself, and look forward. He did immediately. I yelled pretty loud at this guy who was adjacent to me, but I fear the Korean kid sitting in front of me caught most of my volume. A minute later he got up again, I'm assuming to adjust his sitting position, and I yelled at him again to sit down and look forward. I was still pissed.
This guy, and Andy, didn't interact for the rest of the ride while I was on the bus. I wouldn't have allowed that, anyway. I know the reason why I felt so weird throughout the day after that incident. The same shit would happen to me whenever I rode the bus to school when I was little. I had whole legions of people hitting me, punching me, spitting on me, dumping soda on me, and calling me names, and seeing one abuser hurt a helpless person just dredged up all these feelings from my past I don't want to deal with now or later.
Dealing with these old feelings makes me ask The Universe where was my guardian angel? Very rarely did anyone ever stick up for me, or defend me during the abuse. I would have killed to have someone to rely on whenever groups of people got the idea it would be funny to hurt me in any way they could think of, which invariably happened since I had absolutely no friends in school near the end. After I told that guy to stop hitting Andy and sit down, Andy looked at me quizzically, I think. I don't know. After I made that scene on the bus I just wanted to be alone again. I really wish people would leave each other the fuck alone. I don't want to see people hitting other people, and I sure as hell don't want to make a scene in a public place to correct the misdeeds of people who don't know any better, or who don't care.
∅