My Issues with Mind Probe-ers
...and the such.
I went to my doctor, under the impression I was possibly bi-polar. No, no bi-polar, instead he simply says that emotionally, I'm still 13.
Possibly true, but, I don't want to fix it entirely. I refuse to see a therapist, councilor, whatever. I refuse to. Why? They'll cookie-cutter my problem and want to make me grow up entirely. I don't want to change the entirety of me, I just want to get over my fear of growing up and taking chances.
...yeah surprisingly enough, I'm blunt as hell, but daresay I actually do anything or go anywhere. And he called my relationship with Tyler...not a relationship at all! How DARE he! I'm angry on a lot of levels with my Doc, but, I give him a small credit due to the fact he pointed out the initial problem with me.
...I don't wanna grow up. Why? I'm afraid of a few things, for starters.
I'm afraid I'll lose my creativity, I'm afraid I'll lose my lighthearted view on the world (what little I have left), and I'm damn sure no one is going to understand me on the other side.
But, I know I need to take more responcibility, such as driving, and maybe go out and do some things. I tried to suggest to Tyler maybe I'm not so alone in this, because he's a bit like me, but he's breaking out, and thusly, doesn't think he has a problem.
Well, he does, he's ball-less to be quite frank.
Anyway. I know I should grow up a little, but, I don't want to lose me, and.... The only thing is, what I know is me, I still dislike. I have almost no self confidence anymore except in my few abilities.
I guess, then, the whole growing up process that I missed in high school, must also be combined with the self confidence building...ness...
...why is it I can't just be an okay person? I would be happy if I knew how to keep all this in, rather than crying like a freakin' baby on a daily basis.
I went to my doctor, under the impression I was possibly bi-polar. No, no bi-polar, instead he simply says that emotionally, I'm still 13.
Possibly true, but, I don't want to fix it entirely. I refuse to see a therapist, councilor, whatever. I refuse to. Why? They'll cookie-cutter my problem and want to make me grow up entirely. I don't want to change the entirety of me, I just want to get over my fear of growing up and taking chances.
...yeah surprisingly enough, I'm blunt as hell, but daresay I actually do anything or go anywhere. And he called my relationship with Tyler...not a relationship at all! How DARE he! I'm angry on a lot of levels with my Doc, but, I give him a small credit due to the fact he pointed out the initial problem with me.
...I don't wanna grow up. Why? I'm afraid of a few things, for starters.
I'm afraid I'll lose my creativity, I'm afraid I'll lose my lighthearted view on the world (what little I have left), and I'm damn sure no one is going to understand me on the other side.
But, I know I need to take more responcibility, such as driving, and maybe go out and do some things. I tried to suggest to Tyler maybe I'm not so alone in this, because he's a bit like me, but he's breaking out, and thusly, doesn't think he has a problem.
Well, he does, he's ball-less to be quite frank.
Anyway. I know I should grow up a little, but, I don't want to lose me, and.... The only thing is, what I know is me, I still dislike. I have almost no self confidence anymore except in my few abilities.
I guess, then, the whole growing up process that I missed in high school, must also be combined with the self confidence building...ness...
...why is it I can't just be an okay person? I would be happy if I knew how to keep all this in, rather than crying like a freakin' baby on a daily basis.