When figurative language is bad

[sartorias]

The other day I posted Jane Austen's writing advice clipped from her letters to a writing niece. Afterwards, I got three different people writing me privately to ask, basically, what is so bad about figurative language

Comments

[queenoftheskies]

I'm guilty of using tinged, so I'm glad to know it's frowned on. Thank you for that information!

[sartorias]

Well, it is frowned upon by this group, anyway!

[asakiyume]

I don't frown on it! I wouldn't take any of this discussion as indicating that a word shouldn't be used. I think sometimes we write (and not just write, this happens when people speak, too) automatically; we just reach for off-the-shelf words and phrases, like TV dinners. And the thing is, potatoes don't have to just be cooked like instant mashed potatoes; there are lots of other ways to cook them, if you start from scratch. They can have all sorts of textures and can take all kinds of flavors. So, when a beta reader, say, urges a writer to use some other phrase, or whatever, it's because they think the original phrase is too commonplace or overused, and they want to get the writer to expand their repertoire. And that's cool. But I don't think it should mean that you can't ever use the stock phrase. Sometimes instant mashed potatoes are what you need.

[sartorias]

Yep. And especially in first drafts. I think of such words as scaffolding. They get the idea across, but if we want the piece to be a bit more memorable, on the second pass, is there a better way to phrase it? Sometimes there is, sometimes there isn't.

[asakiyume]

Exactly. I think for me the thing is that I want to be *aware* of what I'm doing. Not just have words fall in there out of laziness (but sometimes it's better to fix on a second or later draft, because otherwise you cut off the flow of words altogether--in my case, anyway).

[sartorias]

Thoroughly agree. Get the story down. Tinker later.

[danceswithwaves]

Or maybe you don't want the piece to be memorable. You want to get the idea across in an easily-understood way, but not have it stand out at all.

Like they were saying above about empty calories -- coke is called empty calories, but sometimes it complements the pizza so well, you want that instead of water.

[elialshadowpine]

There is a very well-known, renowned, award-winning author whose works I have not been able to get through because for me, her focus on the pretty prose gets in the way of the story. Fifty-odd pages in, and no sign of a plot, but paragraphs upon paragraphs of lovingly crafted sentences? I know there are folks that would think I have no taste, but I want to be told a story. If the prose interferes with the story, it just doesn't work for me, no matter how beautiful the imagery is.

Of course, there are books where the writing is so bad that it gets in the way of the story, so there are extremes at both ends.

[elialshadowpine]

There is actually a book series by the same author that I mention that I love, because the pretty prose works very well; it's an almost Alice-in-Wonderland-esque children's/YA series, and the prose acts to illuminate the strangeness of the world and events and intensifies them, whereas in the other book I'd read by this author, I literally couldn't figure out what the plot was supposed to be.

I'm of a similar opinion about different books needing different approaches. The language in my desert-set fantasy steampunk CSI team/political drama series is very different from my urban fantasies. And then I write in first person and the voice totally changes.

And yeah, I've had that happen, too, where I've been taken out of place by a sentence or paragraph that just felt, while pretty, oddly structured and strange, and sometimes out of cadence with the rest of the prose.

[aulus_poliutos]

What author is that if you don't mind telling?

And sometimes it's just personal taste. I could never get into Jemisin's style. I may be missing out on some good books, but if I don't enjoy the process of reading, it's a Back on the Shelf for me. I've had to read some books I disliked at university, and life is too short for that.

[elialshadowpine]

I didn't mention because I didn't want to start an argument, but Cat Valente. I actually adore her children's novel series, because the world setting is such that her focus on prose fits with the story and illuminates it. But I know a lot of people loved Palimpset, which is supposed to be a very diverse cast, but I really just did not get it.

I like different of Jemisin's work. If you tried the Kingdoms books and didn't like, I'd suggest trying the Egypt-based ones because the voice is somewhat different. The POV character tends to color the narration in her work, I've noticed.