Difficult topic even for one coming at it from the inside.
Trans women are seen as women- ie useful for sex and victimhood if sex isn't forthcoming. 'Everyone knows' that all trannies are on the game, don't they?
What is needed is for people to get beyond what 'everyone knows'
Sigh :o(
As you know, my blog is f-locked so I'll post this open page.
What everybody knows about trans women
Trans women are all very tall. Sure, some trans women are tall, but so are some cis women. I'm 5'6" my cis female neighbour, Jenny is 6'2".
Trans women are all plus size Sure, there are some big trans women, just like there are big cis women. I'm UK size 14/16 depending on the cut and I buy all my clothes off the peg.
Trans women all look like a fifties fashion plate. (the 'cast of 'grease' ' according to one radfem) Some may do- so do some cis women. I tend to live in jeans and casuals unless I'm poshing up to go out (like most cis women).
Trans women have big feet. Of course some do. So do some cis women- my cis friend Mona is size 9- I'm size 7.
Trans women have big hands. Some probably do- so do some cis women. I take a medium in gloves.
Trans women have deep voices. Maybe some do- so do some cis women. I sing contralto and know some cis women in the tenor range.
Trans women have stubbly faces. Perhaps some are still undergoing electrolysis/laser treatment. Cis women do this too. After well over two thousand hours of same, I can assure you that my face is hair free and I never had much body hair to begin with.
Trans women have prominent Adam's Apples. Some perhaps do. ALL women have an Adam's apple as do I, but if you look at the pic I posted recently, you'll find it hard to see.
Trans women have prominent brow ridges. Some do, as do some cis women. I don't, as it happens.
Trans women all have boob jobs. Some do as do some cis women. I don't. What you see is all mine.
Trans women can never get into a relationship. Some can't, or perhaps don't want to. This is true of cis women too. I've been in a (heterosexual in my case) relationship for almost 19 years and married for almost 6 of those years.
Trans women find it hard to get work. Like that's unusual for anyone these days! I work (part time these days) and I've always worked.
Trans women are all on the game. Some are, like some cis women. I haven't got the legs for it and it's cold round the back of the Town Hall at this time of year!
Trans women all wear wigs. Some do, like some cis women. Mine is all my own.
All trans women have been in previous relationships prior to transition. Some have. Like previous relationships are uncommon amongst cis people. All my experience of relationships both social and sexual have been as you see me.
All trans women have had a 'sex change'. Not all trans women have surgery. It's not a 'sex change' as you can't change what already is, with or without surgical intervention. Call it 'gender confirmation' if you must. As it happens, I have.
Trans women all have facial surgery. Some do, like some cis women. In my case, what you see is what was always there.
Trans women all dress 'too young'. Like cis women never dress 'too young' whatever that is. At fiftysomething, I mostly go for the classics these days, but since I transitioned at 15, I think I was allowed 'young' don't you? Which brings me to:
Trans women all transition in middle age. Some do and some do it much younger. I was 15.
You can always tell a trans woman in public. How can you be so sure? That might be a cis woman you just insulted with your crude generalisations. I washed my hands next to you in the ladies' this morning and I drank my coffee sat at the next table whilst chatting to you.............
In other words, it's no more possible to generalise about trans women than it is about cis women. Why condemn trans women for all the same behaviours (or lack of them) displayed by cis women?
One of my friends is a more "stereotypical" trans woman. We met at work, during a summer language school about eight years ago. My other colleagues were all whispering behind her back about how real women are not X and real women are not Y, and I kept talking back more or less along the lines you posted until people stopped gossiping about her with me. I am still angry about that. Why does it even matter what she looks like, and whether she manages to "pass"? She is a woman.
'Passing privilege' as they call it is an issue for many- because I am physically slight and transitioned young enough to avoid some of the worst aspects of puberty (userpic's me as 19 year old undergrad :o) I have it, yet there are so still many sexist and misogynistic assumptions about what women are or should be. 'You can't want to be a woman if you don't do x,y or z' or 'if you do a,b or c' is something that forces many trans women into a totally false approach- and the worst offenders over this are often the very gatekeepers who should be empathetic.
'She is a woman'
Yes, absolutely! Like there are no homely women out there.
The whole uncomfortable idea that there's an ideal type or way of being is straight out of the Nazi ideological framework and we all know where that led..........
The notion of 'passing' made me think of being Jewish. We experience significantly less prejudice and discrimination if we can 'pass' and if we don't admit publicly to being Jewish. Similar narratives at the bigot's end, I suspect, leading to similar vocabulary at ours.
Trans women are seen as women- ie useful for sex and victimhood if sex isn't forthcoming. 'Everyone knows' that all trannies are on the game, don't they?
What is needed is for people to get beyond what 'everyone knows'
Sigh :o(
As you know, my blog is f-locked so I'll post this open page.
What everybody knows about trans women
Trans women are all very tall.
Sure, some trans women are tall, but so are some cis women. I'm 5'6" my cis female neighbour, Jenny is 6'2".
Trans women are all plus size
Sure, there are some big trans women, just like there are big cis women. I'm UK size 14/16 depending on the cut and I buy all my clothes off the peg.
Trans women all look like a fifties fashion plate. (the 'cast of 'grease' ' according to one radfem)
Some may do- so do some cis women. I tend to live in jeans and casuals unless I'm poshing up to go out (like most cis women).
Trans women have big feet.
Of course some do. So do some cis women- my cis friend Mona is size 9- I'm size 7.
Trans women have big hands.
Some probably do- so do some cis women. I take a medium in gloves.
Trans women have deep voices.
Maybe some do- so do some cis women. I sing contralto and know some cis women in the tenor range.
Trans women have stubbly faces.
Perhaps some are still undergoing electrolysis/laser treatment. Cis women do this too. After well over two thousand hours of same, I can assure you that my face is hair free and I never had much body hair to begin with.
Trans women have prominent Adam's Apples.
Some perhaps do. ALL women have an Adam's apple as do I, but if you look at the pic I posted recently, you'll find it hard to see.
Trans women have prominent brow ridges.
Some do, as do some cis women. I don't, as it happens.
Trans women all have boob jobs.
Some do as do some cis women. I don't. What you see is all mine.
Trans women can never get into a relationship.
Some can't, or perhaps don't want to. This is true of cis women too. I've been in a (heterosexual in my case) relationship for almost 19 years and married for almost 6 of those years.
Trans women find it hard to get work.
Like that's unusual for anyone these days! I work (part time these days) and I've always worked.
Trans women are all on the game.
Some are, like some cis women. I haven't got the legs for it and it's cold round the back of the Town Hall at this time of year!
Trans women all wear wigs.
Some do, like some cis women. Mine is all my own.
All trans women have been in previous relationships prior to transition.
Some have. Like previous relationships are uncommon amongst cis people. All my experience of relationships both social and sexual have been as you see me.
All trans women have had a 'sex change'.
Not all trans women have surgery. It's not a 'sex change' as you can't change what already is, with or without surgical intervention. Call it 'gender confirmation' if you must. As it happens, I have.
Trans women all have facial surgery.
Some do, like some cis women. In my case, what you see is what was always there.
Trans women all dress 'too young'.
Like cis women never dress 'too young' whatever that is. At fiftysomething, I mostly go for the classics these days, but since I transitioned at 15, I think I was allowed 'young' don't you?
Which brings me to:
Trans women all transition in middle age.
Some do and some do it much younger. I was 15.
You can always tell a trans woman in public.
How can you be so sure? That might be a cis woman you just insulted with your crude generalisations. I washed my hands next to you in the ladies' this morning and I drank my coffee sat at the next table whilst chatting to you.............
In other words, it's no more possible to generalise about trans women than it is about cis women. Why condemn trans women for all the same behaviours (or lack of them) displayed by cis women?
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I assume you were up to cis = not trans?
Although personally, I'd prefer it if we labelled all women 'woman'.....
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I got fed up with tutoring 'trans 101' so wrote this a while back!
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One of my friends is a more "stereotypical" trans woman. We met at work, during a summer language school about eight years ago. My other colleagues were all whispering behind her back about how real women are not X and real women are not Y, and I kept talking back more or less along the lines you posted until people stopped gossiping about her with me. I am still angry about that. Why does it even matter what she looks like, and whether she manages to "pass"? She is a woman.
Reply
'Passing privilege' as they call it is an issue for many- because I am physically slight and transitioned young enough to avoid some of the worst aspects of puberty (userpic's me as 19 year old undergrad :o) I have it, yet there are so still many sexist and misogynistic assumptions about what women are or should be. 'You can't want to be a woman if you don't do x,y or z' or 'if you do a,b or c' is something that forces many trans women into a totally false approach- and the worst offenders over this are often the very gatekeepers who should be empathetic.
'She is a woman'
Yes, absolutely! Like there are no homely women out there.
Reply
Reply
The whole uncomfortable idea that there's an ideal type or way of being is straight out of the Nazi ideological framework and we all know where that led..........
Reply
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