Books, Writers, Spouses, and Chocolate . . .
Deborah J. Ross talks here about several related subjects as Dave and I launch the rewrite (a very significant rewrite) of Ruler of Naught second book in the Exordium series.
I will say more about Ex and writing with Dave tomorrow, when he officially joins Book View Cave, but for now, the thing that made me smile was the spouse's view when their significant person is tied creatively to someone else.
SO many writers I know ended up divorced, not because of the intrusion of another person, but because their spouse felt the writing was an intrusion. It's gotten so that if writer friends find someone special, I kind of hold my breath, hoping they can get over that "So WHY won't you watch TV with me tonight? Can't that stupid book wait? You haven't even sold it!" or "Really? You're going to spend the entire holiday weekend at your computer, when I got these expensive skiiing tickets for you as a surprise? So I'm supposed to go alone, or sit around bored all weekend? Great choice, and what happened to 'marriage is a partnership'?" hump.
Because writing isn't always neatly segmented off as a nine to five job. It can be a 120 hour a week job, or it can be a zero week job, during which the writer mopes and frets, or cat vacuums frantically, driving the spouse nutso yet again.
But hooking up with another writer doesn't always work, either--I've known situations where one's success and actively being courted by editors, reviewers, con-runners, fans, yadda, hurt the less successful partner so much that the relationship strained, and broke.
Then there is always the madness of two writers trying to deal with a family, should they choose to have one--how do you cope when you are both on deadline, or possessed by the white fire?
Anyway, visiting Dave and Deborah is an extra special pleasure, because Dave and I can lock ourselves into his study, end up snickering and laughing up a storm, and when we come out, there's Deborah, having happily worked a session on her own stories, and ready to talk process, progress, books, reading, the universe--and when I come home, it's such a pleasure to hear "So how much did you guys get done?" and zero drama.
I will say more about Ex and writing with Dave tomorrow, when he officially joins Book View Cave, but for now, the thing that made me smile was the spouse's view when their significant person is tied creatively to someone else.
SO many writers I know ended up divorced, not because of the intrusion of another person, but because their spouse felt the writing was an intrusion. It's gotten so that if writer friends find someone special, I kind of hold my breath, hoping they can get over that "So WHY won't you watch TV with me tonight? Can't that stupid book wait? You haven't even sold it!" or "Really? You're going to spend the entire holiday weekend at your computer, when I got these expensive skiiing tickets for you as a surprise? So I'm supposed to go alone, or sit around bored all weekend? Great choice, and what happened to 'marriage is a partnership'?" hump.
Because writing isn't always neatly segmented off as a nine to five job. It can be a 120 hour a week job, or it can be a zero week job, during which the writer mopes and frets, or cat vacuums frantically, driving the spouse nutso yet again.
But hooking up with another writer doesn't always work, either--I've known situations where one's success and actively being courted by editors, reviewers, con-runners, fans, yadda, hurt the less successful partner so much that the relationship strained, and broke.
Then there is always the madness of two writers trying to deal with a family, should they choose to have one--how do you cope when you are both on deadline, or possessed by the white fire?
Anyway, visiting Dave and Deborah is an extra special pleasure, because Dave and I can lock ourselves into his study, end up snickering and laughing up a storm, and when we come out, there's Deborah, having happily worked a session on her own stories, and ready to talk process, progress, books, reading, the universe--and when I come home, it's such a pleasure to hear "So how much did you guys get done?" and zero drama.