A piece of writing.
Title: A Fallen Angel.
Author: CD.Ward
Summary:
This is a small piece of writing about Lucifer and how he sees the war of heaven and his fall.
Author's notes:
In fact I admit that I put a lot of my own thoughts into this little story. Seeing the history behind the name Lucifer I started to mix the picture we have in mind when we talk about Lucifer and the ability of the Christian church to pervert the facts. With this I came to the conclusion that Lucifer must have a significant amount of humour. I hope I did not fail him there.
I am a Fallen Angel.
And I am proud that I fell.
My name?
What do you care for my name? Would it make any difference? You do not need to call me by my name because I am here and I will talk. When we are done you will leave and the world will not be the same anymore.
Ah, you are laughing?
Well, do so, my friend, but you will see. Now be quiet and let me start again.
I am a Fallen Angel.
And I am proud that I fell.
The heaven cried when I fell and still does nowadays because I am much missed up there. God is almighty and does as he wishes with everyone and everything. The balance is missing - lost. You say that is impossible? You say that I am the evil one? I am not but, such words cannot insult me anymore - not after all these years. I tell you the truth:
I was called Phosphoros and Eosphoros but people forgot these beautiful names long ago because they do not see the bright light in me anymore. I am the one who lives in darkness and the one who comes from hell. I am hell. My name is Lucifer and I am the light bearer, I am the morning star. I brought you the light and the new, awaking day to dispel the scaring darkness of the night. I brought the light and banished the shadows of scaring hours. I brought the light and they called me arrogant and snotty.
I ask you: what? What have I done that I deserve such injustice, such cruel and dirty unfairness? I ask you but of course you cannot know because you have not been there and you do not know yet which things happened to me and what they accused me of.
Proudness.
Proudness has been my first fault indeed - how ridiculous! I am a glittering and shimmering Cherub. That is a fact and nothing else. It is what God created and what he wanted me to be. I was happy with what I have been but then, what I was and what I loved to be changed into a deadly sin. He made me, he created me. It was Him who gave life to me and who made me beautiful but when I bared my heart to said beauty it was suddenly my mistake.
Refusal.
Are you still with me, my friend, to listen carefully? Careful you should be indeed because you never know when God, the Almighty, will let you down due to the same mistakes. I refused to show respect to the humans. I tell you: I was right but He never asked for my reasons. Maybe that is not the truth. I told Him my thoughts and I admit that I was probably not diplomatic enough in that brief encounter. But, I was right! Why should I kneel before them when I have been created first? I say they should kneel in front of me, they should creep and kiss the ground I have walked on. Why should I show respect to anyone who is made of mud - dirty, useless mud - while I am created of fire - bright and powerful, warming and beautiful fire!
You look scared now.
Are you scared?
Why?
Ah, because you realise that fire is baking mud... see, even you understand my reason but God did not and still does not. But I do not care anymore. I am done with him and after all this injustice I have my own plans but I am anticipating, forgive me. Patience is not my strength.
It was God who created us and it was Him who chose the mud and the fire. It was Him and now it is my fault? It is me who He blames just because I am the one who pointed out His failure. I was banned and cast out of heaven, thrown down without a grave to rest. Respect indeed.
Free will.
I see that you do not get the point, so let me explain what I mean and what you can do wrong there. All of us Cherubs and Seraphim were born to follow our Leader without any doubts or requests. We were born to make the world better and to follow the idea of heavenly paradise down on earth. But later we were allowed to add our own thoughts, our free will while the main angels still had to follow our orders. God's reasons for this change? I have no idea and I do not care. If you want to know, die and ask him. Funny, isn't it? Ah, no. I can see it in your eyes that you are not amused. You do not seem to have a good sense of humour, do you?
Free will does interesting things to you. It adjusts your sight in a very affecting way and it adds some distance between the Almighty one and His obedient creatures. Well, in the end the servants are not that obedient and submissive anymore which, of course, is not wanted, not allowed and not tolerated. Some of us turned into humans but I did not because... you remember the mud, don't you? But God says we have the chance to return to heaven when we live a morally and holy life. Do not ask me if any of the apostate made it back because I do not know. But I know what the result of all this is: pure dictatorship, masked by free will - as long as you do not use it.
Lust.
Do not even think about laughing! There is no reason to do so. God ordered some of us, the Grigori, to help the archangels to build Eden. Descended from heaven they fell in love with the humans, their wonderful daughters in particular. I will never ever understand the reason but it is not important, really. The poor angels... told them heavenly secrets and united with them, and finally giving birth to the dynasty of the Nephilim. And what did God do, hm? The one who should stand above all jealousy and resentment? You think He accepted them as part of the family or that He welcomed them, that He at least let them live in peace? I tell you what He did: He sent the Flood to kill them all. Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. Truely?
But back to the lust I was speaking about. Sexual lust in particular. After all this we have learned our lesson. I can imagine more enjoyable deaths than drowing in salty water. But did the humans learn anything? No. And what is another deadly sin (literally) for angels is alright for the main humans down on earth? No offense, my strange friend, but you may understand that I am not able to feel or show any respect to such creatures.
Now you know the reasons for my Fall.
You are still here and still listening?
Brave, my friend.
You sit with a Fallen Angel and you wonder how I fell?
War arose in heaven and I bet, yes I bet, that you have heard the fairytales about the dragon of the apocalypse with seven heads and ten horns? The dragon who swept off a third of the stars and tried to devour the new born Christ. Fairytales, I say! They just tell lies and fairytales. Look at me and I assure you: what you now see is Lucifer, the light bearer, and I am not able to turn into other shapes. Metamorphosis is the business of someone else. No, the truth is that I had to face a whole army. So many against one, is it not pathetic? I had no chance to win.
Michael, the beloved archangel, was the worst of them all. He should have fallen, not me. He, who confesses the heretic in his name already!* I never tried to be like God and I never wanted to dispossess him. I swear by... God? How ironic but yes, I swear by God that I never wanted to do such a thing. He just does not see who his real enemies are and I daresay that by now I have a real reason to hate Him.
Why did they banish me from heaven and did not kill me instead, you ask?
A good question indeed but think about it, put the pieces together and ask yourself. You are smart, I am sure you can come up with the correct answer. Why did He not kill me if He is almighty? God who can do everything, but no, they just made me fall down into the neverending darkness - so that I can return. Almighty... as good as a play.
Now the time has come.
The time has come for the Fallen Angel to return.
I am the light bearer.
I bring the fire, the light, to show you the darkness.
~ End ~
* Michael: Hebrew name; literal translation: Who is like God?
Your Knight.
Author: CD.Ward
Summary:
This is a small piece of writing about Lucifer and how he sees the war of heaven and his fall.
Author's notes:
In fact I admit that I put a lot of my own thoughts into this little story. Seeing the history behind the name Lucifer I started to mix the picture we have in mind when we talk about Lucifer and the ability of the Christian church to pervert the facts. With this I came to the conclusion that Lucifer must have a significant amount of humour. I hope I did not fail him there.
I am a Fallen Angel.
And I am proud that I fell.
My name?
What do you care for my name? Would it make any difference? You do not need to call me by my name because I am here and I will talk. When we are done you will leave and the world will not be the same anymore.
Ah, you are laughing?
Well, do so, my friend, but you will see. Now be quiet and let me start again.
I am a Fallen Angel.
And I am proud that I fell.
The heaven cried when I fell and still does nowadays because I am much missed up there. God is almighty and does as he wishes with everyone and everything. The balance is missing - lost. You say that is impossible? You say that I am the evil one? I am not but, such words cannot insult me anymore - not after all these years. I tell you the truth:
I was called Phosphoros and Eosphoros but people forgot these beautiful names long ago because they do not see the bright light in me anymore. I am the one who lives in darkness and the one who comes from hell. I am hell. My name is Lucifer and I am the light bearer, I am the morning star. I brought you the light and the new, awaking day to dispel the scaring darkness of the night. I brought the light and banished the shadows of scaring hours. I brought the light and they called me arrogant and snotty.
I ask you: what? What have I done that I deserve such injustice, such cruel and dirty unfairness? I ask you but of course you cannot know because you have not been there and you do not know yet which things happened to me and what they accused me of.
Proudness.
Proudness has been my first fault indeed - how ridiculous! I am a glittering and shimmering Cherub. That is a fact and nothing else. It is what God created and what he wanted me to be. I was happy with what I have been but then, what I was and what I loved to be changed into a deadly sin. He made me, he created me. It was Him who gave life to me and who made me beautiful but when I bared my heart to said beauty it was suddenly my mistake.
Refusal.
Are you still with me, my friend, to listen carefully? Careful you should be indeed because you never know when God, the Almighty, will let you down due to the same mistakes. I refused to show respect to the humans. I tell you: I was right but He never asked for my reasons. Maybe that is not the truth. I told Him my thoughts and I admit that I was probably not diplomatic enough in that brief encounter. But, I was right! Why should I kneel before them when I have been created first? I say they should kneel in front of me, they should creep and kiss the ground I have walked on. Why should I show respect to anyone who is made of mud - dirty, useless mud - while I am created of fire - bright and powerful, warming and beautiful fire!
You look scared now.
Are you scared?
Why?
Ah, because you realise that fire is baking mud... see, even you understand my reason but God did not and still does not. But I do not care anymore. I am done with him and after all this injustice I have my own plans but I am anticipating, forgive me. Patience is not my strength.
It was God who created us and it was Him who chose the mud and the fire. It was Him and now it is my fault? It is me who He blames just because I am the one who pointed out His failure. I was banned and cast out of heaven, thrown down without a grave to rest. Respect indeed.
Free will.
I see that you do not get the point, so let me explain what I mean and what you can do wrong there. All of us Cherubs and Seraphim were born to follow our Leader without any doubts or requests. We were born to make the world better and to follow the idea of heavenly paradise down on earth. But later we were allowed to add our own thoughts, our free will while the main angels still had to follow our orders. God's reasons for this change? I have no idea and I do not care. If you want to know, die and ask him. Funny, isn't it? Ah, no. I can see it in your eyes that you are not amused. You do not seem to have a good sense of humour, do you?
Free will does interesting things to you. It adjusts your sight in a very affecting way and it adds some distance between the Almighty one and His obedient creatures. Well, in the end the servants are not that obedient and submissive anymore which, of course, is not wanted, not allowed and not tolerated. Some of us turned into humans but I did not because... you remember the mud, don't you? But God says we have the chance to return to heaven when we live a morally and holy life. Do not ask me if any of the apostate made it back because I do not know. But I know what the result of all this is: pure dictatorship, masked by free will - as long as you do not use it.
Lust.
Do not even think about laughing! There is no reason to do so. God ordered some of us, the Grigori, to help the archangels to build Eden. Descended from heaven they fell in love with the humans, their wonderful daughters in particular. I will never ever understand the reason but it is not important, really. The poor angels... told them heavenly secrets and united with them, and finally giving birth to the dynasty of the Nephilim. And what did God do, hm? The one who should stand above all jealousy and resentment? You think He accepted them as part of the family or that He welcomed them, that He at least let them live in peace? I tell you what He did: He sent the Flood to kill them all. Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. Truely?
But back to the lust I was speaking about. Sexual lust in particular. After all this we have learned our lesson. I can imagine more enjoyable deaths than drowing in salty water. But did the humans learn anything? No. And what is another deadly sin (literally) for angels is alright for the main humans down on earth? No offense, my strange friend, but you may understand that I am not able to feel or show any respect to such creatures.
Now you know the reasons for my Fall.
You are still here and still listening?
Brave, my friend.
You sit with a Fallen Angel and you wonder how I fell?
War arose in heaven and I bet, yes I bet, that you have heard the fairytales about the dragon of the apocalypse with seven heads and ten horns? The dragon who swept off a third of the stars and tried to devour the new born Christ. Fairytales, I say! They just tell lies and fairytales. Look at me and I assure you: what you now see is Lucifer, the light bearer, and I am not able to turn into other shapes. Metamorphosis is the business of someone else. No, the truth is that I had to face a whole army. So many against one, is it not pathetic? I had no chance to win.
Michael, the beloved archangel, was the worst of them all. He should have fallen, not me. He, who confesses the heretic in his name already!* I never tried to be like God and I never wanted to dispossess him. I swear by... God? How ironic but yes, I swear by God that I never wanted to do such a thing. He just does not see who his real enemies are and I daresay that by now I have a real reason to hate Him.
Why did they banish me from heaven and did not kill me instead, you ask?
A good question indeed but think about it, put the pieces together and ask yourself. You are smart, I am sure you can come up with the correct answer. Why did He not kill me if He is almighty? God who can do everything, but no, they just made me fall down into the neverending darkness - so that I can return. Almighty... as good as a play.
Now the time has come.
The time has come for the Fallen Angel to return.
I am the light bearer.
I bring the fire, the light, to show you the darkness.
~ End ~
* Michael: Hebrew name; literal translation: Who is like God?
Your Knight.