...she was someone's baby doll...
Well, it's been 5 months that I have not had any alcohol in my system! WooHoo for me! hehe. It's also been 5 months that I have not smoked! And to me, it doesn't matter if noone is even proud of me, because I am totally proud of myself. And that's what matters the most to me. I did this for myself. And I am very happy with my decision.
I still don't think that it's like "OMG AWFUL" for those who still do drink sometimes. Even though, I do worry and always will worry because so many things can happen to you from drinking and you can put yourself in positions that you will not be able to handle as well if you were sober. But, it's still cool with me for those who do it. Just don't go out and get reeaaaaally trashed please. I still don't think I'll be doing it for a while though. There are just so many reasons that I feel I don't need to and that I shouldn't.
For one, my mom is a big reason. She has so much trust in me now, more than ever before, and that's knowing about my past, that I did used to drink. I have told myself that I will not let her down. If ever I'm in a position on whether or not to drink or not, I just think... "would my mommy be proud?" So, she's a major reason I'll be staying away from it.
Second, God. He made each and every one of us. He wants us to respect ourselves and have respect for other people. He does not want us harming our bodies. By drinking to the point that your very drunk, that is in other words saying, "Screw You" to God. At least, it is in my opinion. I think that if you become close enough to God you can respect that and perhaps wait until the appropriate age to drink. And with that age, only drink ocassionally and not too much.
Third, THE LAW MANNNNN! lol. I mean aren't you sometimes scared that you'll get caught. I know I always was. It is such a relief knowing I don't have to worry about that anymore. I mean really it is. I love it. lol.
Fourth reason being my family. My father used to be an alcoholic. A lot of my other family members are alcoholics or are on the verge of being alcoholics. That is scary. I do not want to end up like them at all. I want to be a good wife and mommy when I grow up and set a good example for my kids and be there for them.
My final reason would probably just be that I can have just as much fun not drinking! Or maybe, even more fun. Because, sometimes drinking too much leads to bad things and it turns into a bad night or experience. Gosh, one night I was so drunk that me and my best friends got into a HUGE fight and we're cussing, yelling, and crying hysterically all night. That wouldn't have happened had we have been sober. And c'mon guys.. .don't ya'll want a total memory of all the fun times you've had. Instead of just bits and pieces. lol. I know I do.
All of the above also goes with smoking too. It's just a big no-no for me now. I don't have any need for it. WOOOOO! :-D lol.
Okay, but like I said...I respect other peoples decisions/beliefs in drinking/smoking. But this is just how I feel about it. So respect it too!! :-D
Don't think I'm never temtped though. lol. There are a few times, when I think "Gosh, just one drink... maybe two!" Or... "Can't I just get drunk once this summer!?" But those are the times when I just have to think to myself about all my reasons not to! And then, I feel all better. So, I'm coming along pretty well!! hehe. :-D
oh, and please keep my grandma in ya'll prayers. my mom had to take her to the hospital today becuase she's sick and doesn't know what's wrong and just keeps feeling worse. and now the doctor's don't even know what's wrong with her either. but, i think they are gonna put her in a room pretty soon. but just pray guys! thanks!!
okay, well time to clean the kitchen and take a shower after that.
love ya'll.
peace. sarah.