wtf???????

[sarita13]

okay, so for the first time in what...4 or 5 months i think...in which i haven't talked to ricky...i finally found him online today. he must have completely forgot about me. i mean, he remembered me, but i don't matter to him anymore. i don't matter to any one of my friends, except for kaylee and rachael (i think). this is what i'm noticing to be more and more true and i'm trying to accept this as petty high school crap and it will be over in 7 months. i need to get them all out of my mind and only concentrate on school (and maybe frank, who actually talks to me and cares about what i have to say). why does this always fucking happen to me? everyone i care about always leaves...either that or i move away! maybe it's a sign to stop caring about people. because i think, as a whole, people suck, they are petty and pretty much care only about themselves.
i hate everyone. i wish fucking high school were over so i could start something meaningful.
thanks to kaylee, rachael, frank, and sometimes raquel who care a little bit more then anyone else.
wait, one more thing i noticed: i care about everyone! i always can tell if someone is depressed and i always say something about it. people used to use me to listen to their problems because i'm good at it. but, when i have a problem, who fucking cares? no one. I NEED SOMEONE TO LISTEN TO ME TOO!!!!!