Rain-Bow Legacy (Gen 1.0)
It's been a long time since I've taken a shot at a legacy. School caused my last one to poof into vaporware, hopefully such will not be the case with this one. Much thanks to Brilliantcat for pointing me to this challenge.
Warning: the following legacy contains pixilated, censored nudity (because some people are prudes), foul language, bad humor, bad spelling, fires and maxis fugs. Do not read if you're pregnant, blind, illiterate, or have better things to do. May cause irritation, cramps, mood swings, and (in rare cases) spontainious combustion.
Meet Azure Rain-Bow. She's Spent most of her life living in the shadiest area of SimCity with her father (Long Bow, a pimp who, according to the rather friendly girls standing on various corners, did NOT live up to his name) and Mother (Sunny Rain, a stripper who had more respect than her husband in the community). After their shocking death involving debts, cough syrup, and a cowbell (don't ask, the police are still baffled), Azure decided it was time to take what stolen money her parents had and leave.
Notice the little shack in the background. The tree that's the only improvement to the land scape. The look of "I'm tired, poor, and most likely fucked." on her face. Yes, this is the standard start to a legacy challenge. To make things even better for her, it started to rain.
The welcome wagon dropped by to greet Azure to the neighborhood. For obvious reasons, they were sent home right away.
Azure: Sarinn, I know I'm poor, but I thought there wasn't a price for a roof.
Sarinn: Oh yeah. Roof. I always forget that little detail.
It rained all day and night. At one point, early in the afternoon, the tree was struck by lightning and cought fire. My legacy tree. On fire. Anyone else think the Powers That Be are forshadowing anything?
First job in the paper, and it matches her LTW.
Ah, Ramen. The food of choice for starving students, the working poor, and legacy founders everwhere.
Bored of being stuck in the house job hunting, Azure went out and started digging. Turns out, she has a thing for nature. Boring? Yes. However, she did find two different maps, as well as got a decent start on a bug collection.
I seriously think the Powers That Be (hence forth known as the PTB) are trying to tell me something. Not sure why. Just a feeling I have.
Sarinn: GET INSIDE!
Azure: Oh look! Paratrooper Spider!
Sarinn: Inside, now. And GET THAT THING AWAY FROM ME! *shudder*
Azure: Oh gods, what time is it?
Sarinn: 5am. Get up Private Rain-Bow. And I want to be able to bounce a quarter off your bed when it's made.
Azure: Why the hell did I want to join the army again?
Sarinn: Because you've spent your teen-hood being a thug, and figure you should get paid for doing it legally.
Azure: I need a shower. You have no idea how much mud I ran through today and how much shit I was carrying.
Sarinn: Hey, at least you got promoted.
Azure: True. Must celebrate.
Sarinn: What do you have in mind?
Azure: Food and a guy. I need to get laid.
Sarinn: Oh, you want kids already?
Azure: ... Yeah, that's it. Kids.
She ended up going to a decently posh place (the name I can't remember). Her logic: expensive food and drinks attracts guys with more money than she has. Of course, the paper boy has more money than her, but that's besides the point.
Azure: Hmmm I think I know what I want.
Sarinn: You won't find a guy by ordering food, having him plop down beside you all of a sudden, and sharing dinner with him. This isn't Lady and the Tramp.
Azure: It should be that easy. *pouts*
Sarinn: Just look around, you'll find someone.
Sarinn: What about one of them?
Azure: Gay.
Sarinn: You don't know that.
Azure: Two guys sitting beside each other in a very large booth. And they ordered the same thing.
Sarinn: What about - Never mind.
Azure: I don't want to know what he's pretending to cup with his hand.
Azure: I'm going home.
Sarinn: Oh common, There's other guys out there.
Azure: There better be. If this is the best we have to hope for, we're doomed.
The next night, she went out gambling. Met some people, made some money off some suckers. It's their fault, really. I mean...
Would you trust this face to deal your cards?
Sadly, the best looking dude in the place reminds me of Quagmire. Ummm... No.
Sarinn: Whatcha up to?
Azure: Tinkering. I want a promotion and need to get better at mechanical things.
Tinkering: So much fun, you'll put your arm through a wall.
To add insult to injury, the microwave burst into flames. Along with the fridge. Azure doesn't have a fire alarm. I knew I was forgetting something else that was important.
Day 6 or something of Azure trying to find a guy that she won't fight with, dislike, or ignore.
DJ'ing is srs biznass, yo.
Ah, a goth night club and all the steriotypes show up. None of whom wanted to talk to Azure more than 2 seconds. Not that I really want her to shack up with the vamp anyways, so maybe it's for the best.
Fact: Ramen will bust into flames if microwaved too long.
Note to self: Still need to remember to get a smoke alarm.
Azure: I hate my life.
Sarinn: I think it hates you, too.
Azure: I'm serious. I can't find a guy, still haven't made drill sgt, my microwave keeps trying to kill me, and... and...
Sarinn: And you need a shower?
Azure: YES!
Azure decided she needed to get away and relax. She'd recently been told abuot a park for nature enthusiasts like herself and decided to check it out.
Where she bumped into the good witch. The witch did her standard "Give-everyone-on-the-lot-an-orgasim" spell as Azure went up to her. Surprisingly, she couldn't even have a good conversation with the good witch.
Interesting fact: despite being a good witch, and being on the nature hobby lot thing, the good witch does NOT like any conversations dealing with nature. Closet evil witch, I'm thinking.
Sarinn: Hydropnics? Shouldn't that be done indoors?
Azure: Yes, but there's this label on the side.
Warning: Keep in direct sunlight. - EAxis Gardening Co.
Sarinn: That explains a lot.
Nothing like an out-of-season penguin to cheer up my depressed founder.
Azure: I'm loooooonly. I want a guy. Want a better place. My life sucks more than when I was living in the North End in SimCity. You're supposed to be a SimGuardian. Can't you help in some way?
Sarinn: Well, Can't really help you with a guy. But...
Sarinn: There. you now have company. Store didn't have basset hounds, but I got the closest thing I could find and named him Gabriel.
Azure: Awesome! But why did you want a basset hound?
Sarinn: It's Batou's dog, from Ghost in the Shell. Which is also the same dog the writer and director -
Azure: Sarinn, your geek is showing.
Sarinn: Sorry.
Azure: Heeeeeeeeellllllllp!
Sarinn: You're fine.
Azure: Getthemoffmegetthemoffme
Sarinn: Here in Soviet SimLand, nature pokes you.
Azure: NOT FUNNY!
Yet another night. Yet another shot at finding a guy. Wait... Could it be? Did she find someone? O_O
Sarinn: Oh gods, no.
Old guy: Mile high club? Of course I know about it. Me and my buddies started that club. When we first started using B-52s we made sure to bless each bomber with a woman.
If that isn't the look of a woman plotting something, then I have learned nothing in my 30 years of being a guy.
They do get along well. They spent ages laughing people dancing, she actually had good conversations with the guy, which was a change from everyone else she's delt with.
Also, notice the background. What is it with my founder and fire?
*sigh* My founder's a golddigger.
Azure: I like him.
Sarinn: He's old enough to be your father. Or father's older brother at least.
Azure: So? I'm pretty sure his parts still work. You want me to have kids, right?
Sarinn: ugh. Mebbe we can fix him up.
Finally an end to a good day for my founder. Minus sucking face with someone three times her age (though she doesn't think it's bad).
I was hoping for a more solid relationship by now, by she's had great difficulty getting to know people, despite being fairly nice. Ah well, maybe kids next update.