Writings, Thinkings and Munchins n' Crunchin's
Well, I've fed my face and now I'm staring at the computer screen. My email inboxes are clean and squeaky, I'm sick of YouTube locking (on school computer at the moment) and I'm waiting aimlessly between classes. My phone died so I cannot get through to anyone. It lets me think though, my head hooked up to this thing, playing music and typing.
I think that I am at least 50%-70% responsible for having locked myself into this 'all-emotion/no-emotion' cycle. It's not a very healthy way to live, that's for sure, and it makes me a pain in the ass to deal with when I implode, or even worse (sometimes) explode. I am trying to make conscious strides to change my behavior, trying to make strides to better my self and keep moving forward (both for myself and my son) and keep hitting the road as best I can. I can only pray those who've chosen to come along for the ride have patience as I try to figure deeper parts of myself I've chosen to bury or has been sitting on the backburner. I don't know what my future holds, but with a schedule for regularly seeing my son, with regular and engaging classes that I can handle I think things may be improving, bit by bit. I think that my life overall, is better than where it was two months ago. I'm less stressed as far as my home life is concerned, and I don't actually dread walking in the front door, I look forward to it...hey, sometimes the yapping guard dogs are nice to come home to.
As far as my spiritual life goes, I'm kind of hitting a flat piece at the moment, and I am alright with that. What with helping out a family over the last couple months (which took a lot out of myself, and out of Ravyn in my observations), before my fiancee and I's breakup, starting out a newbie with the Georgian Coven and the tarot-reading job at the Blue Moon. I've been taking a break from serious, deep magickal work until my head stops spinning from everything that has been going on. However, I raring to get back to moving on my personal magickal studies.
I think that I am at least 50%-70% responsible for having locked myself into this 'all-emotion/no-emotion' cycle. It's not a very healthy way to live, that's for sure, and it makes me a pain in the ass to deal with when I implode, or even worse (sometimes) explode. I am trying to make conscious strides to change my behavior, trying to make strides to better my self and keep moving forward (both for myself and my son) and keep hitting the road as best I can. I can only pray those who've chosen to come along for the ride have patience as I try to figure deeper parts of myself I've chosen to bury or has been sitting on the backburner. I don't know what my future holds, but with a schedule for regularly seeing my son, with regular and engaging classes that I can handle I think things may be improving, bit by bit. I think that my life overall, is better than where it was two months ago. I'm less stressed as far as my home life is concerned, and I don't actually dread walking in the front door, I look forward to it...hey, sometimes the yapping guard dogs are nice to come home to.
As far as my spiritual life goes, I'm kind of hitting a flat piece at the moment, and I am alright with that. What with helping out a family over the last couple months (which took a lot out of myself, and out of Ravyn in my observations), before my fiancee and I's breakup, starting out a newbie with the Georgian Coven and the tarot-reading job at the Blue Moon. I've been taking a break from serious, deep magickal work until my head stops spinning from everything that has been going on. However, I raring to get back to moving on my personal magickal studies.